It’s another test. If I go, I know what I’m saying to him. I’m telling him I will stay away from her. That I’m agreeing to his limitations.
Jace walks out thinking he has my trust. He has no idea about the 700-plus hours of tape of his sister that I listen to almost every night. The way I luxuriate in her melodic voice. The times she talks to herself or her damn pet lizard. The frequency of times I follow her around, tracking her every move. That I know her favorite food. Her cycle. That I fingered her pussy and had my tongue deep inside her two weeks ago. That I can still taste her earthy, floral flavor on my tongue and hear her cries in my ears. Every fucking thing about her is memorialized, and her brother has no clue.
Jace: Where the fuck are you? Thought you were going to be here.
I stareat the text on my phone and grind my molars.
“You going?”
I turn when Onyx appears in the doorway. He leans against the wall, staring at me. I want to tell him no, that I have work, that I have flesh to scrape and tan. Instead, I volley the question back to him. “You going?”
“That chef who works at Sophia’s restaurant will be there. She can cook. I’m hungry.”
Of course, Onyx is hungry. The man eats more than enough for three men. I need to prepare for the next shipment. I can’t let Ivory and Angel down. “No. I’m going to stay.”
Onyx raises an eyebrow, but I ignore his knowing look and finish cleaning my station and tattoo guns.
“She’s grown, Stefan. She’s not a kid.”
I know that. Her pussy was all woman. I avoid his statement and say instead. “I think someone is following me.”
His energy changes. “Are you positive?”
I lean back in my chair and scrub my hand over my face. “No definites, but someone knows where my mother is, and I’ve found a few suspicious tracks outside the cabin. I have no idea what information they have. They are getting way to close. Close to…”I trail off. I could say they are getting too close to my mother, to me, but I also mean they are getting to close to Camryn.
Onyx’s stare is unflinching. He’s one of the smartest men I know and I’m sure he can fill in the end of the sentence I left hanging. “You care about what happens to her.” Onyx’s statement makes my breath hitch in my lungs.
He knows me better than anyone. “I care too fucking much.”
“Maybe that means something.”
“That’s exactly why I’m going to stay away from her. I can’t let another woman get hurt because of what I am, who I am.”
His eyes look tortured, and I hate that I brought it up again. The memory of Ivory and Angel’s mangled bodies, carelessly tossed away and nearly burned to the ground. All of it set inmotion because of the Legion Lords. Because of me. If I hadn’t become El Búho. If I hadn’t become a man so feared, maybe they would still be alive. My niece would be 16 years old now. She’d be a high schooler with dreams of the future. Ivory would still be married to Onyx. He wouldn’t have had to bury his wife and daughter on the same day.
I watch him go, wanting to go with him. I’m sure Riggs will be there as well. The man has his own obsession with our new friend group, namely Jacqueline, but like me, he knows nothing can ever come of it. There’s an even bigger target on his back than mine.
Sighing, I bow my head. Now that I know what she tastes like;it’s killing me not to do it again. Not to push her legs back and feast on the sweetest, softest cunt I’ve ever tasted. To hear her keening cries and feel her fingers dig into my hair.
Gripping my hardened cock, I grit my teeth. For the first time since I was 19 years old, I’m conflicted over my choices, wishing I wasn’t who I am, and she wasn’t who she is. That I could spend hours, out of time and reality, and just slide my cock inside her, use my blade and cut her a little, watch drops of blood trail down her smooth, fragrant skin. Lick the warm metallic taste off each part of her body.
I’m used to taking what I want, when I want it, and damn the consequences. And for the last decade of my life, what I wanted was to kill the people who were directly and indirectly involved in the murder of my sister and niece. Capture and torture the people who I know hurt and brutalize young children and women. Fulfill the promise I made to Ivory and Angel the moment I touched their cold bodies, and saw the blank stare in their dead eyes.
But Camryn is different. She’s the promise of life and pleasure and beauty, not revenge or atonement. She is becomingthe only thing I want just for my own in a world where everything I touch turns to ash.
Chapter 40
Pulling into Jace’s long, tree-lined driveway, I grip the steering wheel, hoping my car can handle the rough terrain. It’s been a year since the last time I was here for a party. It feels so long ago that I showed up filled with problems, worried about what my father would say about me dropping out of medical school. Now I feel infinitely older and wiser, stronger for the choices I’ve made.
Everyone is moving on with life. Lara left for Sweden two months ago. She’ll be gone for almost two years. I’m proud of her. She got the man and the career and is living her dreams. Eleanor is living in Paris with her son and new husband. We are all dying to see her since we had no idea she was pregnant. The baby was a secret until she was nearly six months pregnant, and when we discovered who the father of her baby was, we were all taken aback. I miss everyone. Our last girls’ night feels so far away.
Jace just shared a picture of my niece and his newest tattoo. A tattoo of Valentina’s footprints over his chest. Sophia is in the background smiling, nursing. They both look exhausted, but happy. They’ve come a long way as a couple. I would spend everyday with them upstate, but I want them to have their time as a family. Our home was cold, with only the housekeeping staff, chef, and gardener as friends, and I know Jace wants something different for his daughter.
Pressing my foot on the brakes as I get closer, I freeze. There are two bikes parked outside. Fuck’s sake.
But you knew he could be here.
“Shut up,” I mutter, hating that inner voice that reminds me that I thought about this very possibility as soon as I got the alert on my phone about Jace’s inviting me to Val’s impromptu two-month birthday BBQ. It made me laugh, but I wasn’t shocked. The man celebrates every shit my niece takes, and he can’t stop showing off his new daughter. Who am I to rain on his parade? I love seeing him be a dad, and it means I could see my niece. I haven’t seen Val for a week, and snuggles with her will cure this funky mood. But yeah, at the back of my mind, I knew when I pulled on a beat-up pair of jeans shorts over my bikini, the same white ones from last year, that Stone could walk across Jace’s lawn looking just as sexy as he did the last time.
