“The doctor thinks so. I’ll see if she’ll put you on the list. You can’t even talk to Carly on the phone unless you’re on that list. Let me call them now.”
A few minutes later, Carly’s mom finally called back with the number.
He dialed it and asked for Carly. A moment later, she got on the phone.
“Carly, it’s me,” he said. “How are you doing?”
“I’m doing better. I’m really sorry about all this. I never meant to create chaos in your life.”
“It’s okay. I would never run from a responsibility like this. Carly, you had to know that.”
“I did,” she said. “Look, I’ve got a long way to go. I was a good mother, as good as I could be, but Zan should be withyounow. I need time to get well.”
“I got the paternity test results back,” he said. “I’m Zan’s father.” The words felt so foreign, but there was a sense of pride and hope in them too.
“I know,” she said. “I always knew.”
“I don’t want to upset you, but I do wonder what it is you expect from me. I mean—”
“I’m not trying to get us together, if that’s what you’re asking. I thought what I was doing was right, but I realize I was robbing you of your rights as a father. I also realize dropping it on you all at once was not the best way either. What I willpromise you is that when I am well, I’ll do my part, but I will always make sureyou’llbe in Zan’s life too. We’ll figure it out.”
“That little girl is amazing,” he said. “I can’t believe how smart she is.”
“She is something,” Carly said. He could hear the choked sob in her voice. “She’s the best thing I ever did in my life.”
Mine too, I think.“I don’t want you to worry about Zan. She’s fine. Do you want to see her? Should I bring her to you?”
“Not yet. I need time.” Her voice shook. “Adam, this isn’t going to be just a one-week stay. It could be a long time. I’m kind of a mess. They’re recommending at least ninety days, maybe longer.”
“Okay. Just say when. I told you I’d help you. I meant that whether I was her father or not. I’ll do the right things by her.”
“I know you will. Thank you, Adam. Mom and Dad can’t travel, but if sometime this summer you could get Zan down to see them, that would be great. I feel so bad for taking her from them. She’s the best part of their days.”
Carly must feel so lonely. How did a girl who seemed so strong on the outside get to a place like that?He couldn’t imagine her like this, and he was drawn to help. First Zan, and now this. For the first time, he wasn’t the priority. “I’ll come up with a way to get her out there for a visit.”
“That would mean the world to me and them,” she said, sounding as though she were starting to cry. “Our little girl needs you. Promise me you’ll be careful. Please don’t let anything happen to you.”
“Don’t cry, and don’t worry.” He knew she was talking about the rodeo. “I’ll be careful.” His eyes teared up, and his voice caught as he said goodbye. He sat there in his chair fora good long while. His whole world was spinning out of control. He couldn’t promise that nothing would happen. It wasn’t a matter ofifyou got hurt in bull riding, just a matter of when and how badly.
A knock at the office door pulled him out of the moment. “Yes?”
Zan’s little head poked around the corner of the door. “I cleaned up all my stuff. Do you think we can have a fort tomorrow too?”
He waved her over. “Come here.”
She ran over to him, and he lifted her to his lap. “You like coming to work with me?”
“Yes. Everyone is nice.”
“How about until summer is over and you get to start school, you come with me to work. Would you like that?”
“Yes! Can we bring lunch?”
That seemed out of left field, but she had him already wrapped around her little finger. “Sure. We can pack lunches.”
“That’ll be good practice for when I go to school. School kids get lunch boxes.”
“They do?”
