To find my courage.
I watch as the other first-years read down the list, searching for their names. Some jump up and down, hugging the friends they’ve made this past week. Others shake their heads, disappointment written all over their faces.
All their emotions are understandable but pointless. It doesn’t matter what we feel or want. The academy decides our future.
But the diverse display of emotions isn’t what’s causing anxiety to claw its way up my throat, digging deep into the tissue and drawing blood. No, that’s saved for the students who cast looks in my direction with varying expressions of pity or confusion.
Please do not let me be a dark wielder.
I wring my hands in front of me.
Anything but that.
I swallow, forcing myself to calm down. Getting upset isn’t going to accomplish anything.
Most of the surviving first-years know how badly I want that Veil title. Our numbers have dwindled to around forty over the past week, so we’ve gotten to know each other in a sense, even if only on a superficial level. Enough to know who’s gunning for Veil and who has their eyes set on becoming a Noctryn.
“Nori!” a feminine voice yells, causing me to look over. Mallory is heading in my direction, her cheeks pink from running. They match her cherry-blossom fauxhawk. Her feet skid to a halt right in front of me as she grabs my shoulders for balance. “Have you looked yet?” she asks excitedly, a huge smile lighting up her face.
“Not yet. But I’m working on it,” I reply, forcing myself to appear cool, calm, and collected.
But I know my nervousness is written all over my face. I’ve always been shit at hiding my emotions. The sympathetic look she’s currently directing at me tells me she definitely picked up on it.
“What are you waiting for? You know exactly where your name is on that list. At this point, you’re only confirming it,” she states in a confident tone. Both hands propped on her hips.
“Yeah, that’s kind of what I’m working up the courage for.”
“What are we getting courage for?” Finnley asks, coming up beside her and giving my braid a playful tug.
“She’s nervous about the results,” Mallory explains, pulling my braid out of Finnley’s grasp.
“She has nothing to be nervous about. She’s a Veil through and through,” Ambrose joins in, turning away from the upperclassmen he was talking to and wrapping his arm around my shoulders.
“Or… she’s a Noctryn, which is okay as well,” Finnley replies, but his sincere smile and understanding eyes are directed at me.
Ambrose cuts an annoyed look toward Finnley but doesn’t say anything more.
He’s working really hard to dig himself out of the trenches.
Mallory looks around at us all, both hands back to resting on her slim hips. “Well, I’m walking up and finding my name. Who’s coming with me?”
“Right behind you,” Finnley answers, turning his torso side to side and stretching his arms like he’s preparing for war.
“Me too,” I whisper.
“Nori, you got this,” Ambrose says, grabbing my face gently with both hands and turning me to look at him. “You and me until the end. We always knew we would be Veils together. We’ve waited for this day since we were kids.” His scent wraps around me, the familiar smell of ocean breeze and broken waves grounding me. Reminding me of who I am.
And that I’m not alone.
I nod, breaking eye contact and stepping back to follow my friends.
My steps falter slightly behind Finnley and Mallory, their excitement outweighing my trepidation. Ambrose stays back, allowing us to experience this together as first-years. It’s better this way. For some reason, I’d be even more nervous with him reading the names with me.
The pressure would just be that much more intense.
A large parchment is pinned to the stone, with the Kintoira Academy crest pressed into black wax, dripping down the right corner. The names are written in Solarish, the most common language throughout the realm. Also mandated that everyone know how to read and write in it.
Bold letters in elegant gold writing clearly state “Noctryn” with a group of names beneath.
