I stare at it until my eyes water, then stand up, back straight, and weep silently. The boys are thankfully oblivious, but damnit if Holly doesn’t notice. She scoots close to me, wrapping one arm around me and squeezing me close to her. “It’s a lot, I know. I had the same reaction the first time I saw a nebula through one of these ‘fancy telescopes.’ It makes me feel minuscule, but also, part of a greater community. It’s hard to think that we are each alone, when at this very moment, millions if not billions of people around the world are looking up at it, just like you and me.”
Don’t wipe my eyes, don’t look to see if the boys are watching, solely focused on this fucking amazing woman holding me, I twist under her arm, pull her to me, and kiss her like I’ve never kissed anyone before.
Her little gasp of surprise delights me. She yields to my lips, my tongue, my hands immediately. It would be so easy to get lost in her, in this moment right now. I restrain myself, gripping the reins of my desires and yanking back. Breathing heavily with her, nose to nose, there’s a muffled silence around us. Then, a shout shatters that silence.
“See! I told you!” Todd is loud and exuberant in a way I haven’t seen him in a couple of years. He and Cliff fist-bump.
Cliff asks, “Does this mean we all have to study stars now? Forever?” Sighing quietly, I drop my arms from around Holly and shake my head, not that he can see it.
I’m still formulating words in my head when Holly says, “You should always study the stars, but not because of a kiss. Now, take a look again and estimate how long you think its tail is. We’ll do some quick math together.” Cliff leaps forward, almost knocking over the telescope. His six-year-old attention span is a gift. Todd, however, has lost his smile and is eyeing us warily. Damn teenaged years. I really wasn’t prepared to have a conversation like this with him at Christmas.
Holly refuses to go inside. I get it; this is her moment. Eventually though, the boys are chilled to the bone, even with hot cocoa, all their snow gear on, and a heavy woolen blanket each wrapped around them. After Holly assures me she’ll be okay for a while, I walk them back to the cabin. Through all of their chatter about the comet, I help them get out of their frozen gear and get ready for bed. putting an extra blanket on both their beds.
Tucking Cliff into bed, he asks if Dr. Holly is our new mom now. “Bud, it was just a kiss. She’s got work and a life far away from Mt. Frost. Nothing is changing right now, besides making it home soon.” I ruffle his hair.
“I know. But I really like her. And she makes you smile and play with us more. I like that.” I don’t know what to say. Thankfully, he yawns and rolls over onto his side. I pat his back and tell him goodnight. When I stand to check on Todd in the top bunk, his eyes are squished shut. “Night, bud. I love you,” I say to him, grateful his pretending to be asleep means we can avoid more awkward conversations tonight.
After putting another log on the fire, I head back outside, another blanket in my arms for her. I can hear Holly singing Christmas carols, loudly and slightly off-key, as she looks into the telescope. That’s certainly a vision I never expected to see.
“Sorry about the kiss. And the boys,” she says once I’ve draped the blanket over her shoulders.
“There’s nothing to apologize for. I kissed you. It could be the majestic comet unearthing feelings from my scarred heart. Or it could be that I want to thank you for being here, introducing the boys to the comet, making our Christmas so memorable.” I pause. She says nothing, just looks at me under the stars. “Or it could be that you’ve flipped my world upside down in just a few short days. I feel more alive than I have in years. And since you pulled up in my driveway, I can’t get you out of my mind.”
More silence.
“Your driveway? I thought that house belonged to Mr. Noel.”
Chapter 12
Holly
Ihave built my life around science. Around my career. It’s literally all I have. All I’ve ever wanted. And then this stupid mountain man with callused hands and thighs that ripple in his jeans looked at me, setting a fire inside me. Then this mountain-ranch hand kissed me, with lips so soft, and a tongue that pierced through my armor. And then…this idiotic single dad got me off on his lap in front of the fire. And that internal blaze has been begging to ride him for real since then.
Just when I thought maybe I could give this a go. Or at least, open myself up to more than just one weekend stuck together, I discover that he’s been lying to me? Or withholding information that seems pretty fucking important.
We stare at each other. Overhead, the comet is oblivious to us, my angst, to the passing of time.
Finally, Jack speaks. “Yes, my home. My name is Jack Noel. This is my cabin. My family owns most of Mt. Frost.”
“Seriously? And you just let me believe you were an employee? Why?”
“It felt good to be looked at because I’m Jack. Not because I own Mt. Frost. People, especially women, act a little different when they see dollar signs floating above my head.”
“Yeah, well, that would be weirdly eye-catching.” I huff out, seeing my frozen breath between us. “I guess that explains your familiarity with the cabin. And the boys feeling right at home.”
“Well, they’d feel right at home in a cardboard box. They don’t have many filters on propriety.” He chuckles a little. Another bout of silence. I move back to the telescope and adjust it again. Even though I’m still mad, the awe at viewing the Kringle Comet has that raw edge cooling a bit.
Still looking at the comet, I say, “Look. I’m not sure what to think or feel right now. All I know is that this comet is a once in a lifetime experience, and that I can’t feel my toes. I’m going to go inside to warm up a bit.”
“Do you want me to bring the telescope inside?” Jack asks.
“No, I’ll come back out. It needs to stay outside. If it warms up, the glass will get foggy.”
In silence, Jack follows me back to the cabin. His cabin. An hour ago I was ready to jump him for more orgasms. Climb him with abandon. Ride him like a cowgirl. With no clothes. But now? Now I’m not so sure. Can I trust him? And…does still wanting him, knowing he’s rich, make me a gold digger? I shiver, and not from the cold.
Chapter 13
Jack
