The recollection of the horrifying day means only the slightest whimper escapes my mouth when I slice the shank that ended Agent Moses’s life across my forearm and thigh before removing my panties and placing them in Agent Moses’s pocket.
After taking a moment to ensure I have my story straight, I rip open the door I closed only minutes ago and commence screaming for help. My cries bounce down the isolated corridor before they’re gobbled up by boots thumping on polished concrete floors.
When two guards reach me at the entrance of the surveillance-free room, I collapse into guard number one’s arms while the other moves toward Agent Moses to check him for a pulse.
“H-He tried to r-rape me,” I stutter on purpose, hopeful it will authenticate my ruse. “I-I-I had to protect myself. He left me no choice.” When guard two shakes his head at guard one, announcing he feels no pulse, I release the tears I saved when I slice the recently wiped clean of fingerprints shank through my arm and thigh. “No. He can’t be dead. I just wanted to stop him from hurting me. I-I didn’t mean to k-kill him.”
As I rant and rave that I only meant to protect myself, I’m carted out of the prison and placed into an awaiting ambulance. When the medic suggests a sedative to calm me down, I lower my sobs before pulling my knees to my chest, where they stay until Agent Grayson Rogers enters my hospital room five hours later.
I don’t know whether to be stoked about my top-shelf performance or displeased. It isn’t every day an impromptu script gets you placed into the psych ward of a hospital. I guess I didn’t really need to act when it came to portraying Agent Moses as the man he really was. I found it harder pretending I liked him during Maddox’s transport than I did faking his assault.
“Are you sure this is the story you want to run with, Macy?” Grayson asks, his tone void of the usual cheekiness it has.
I confidently nod. “It isn’t a story. I defended myself from an attacker.”
“By stabbing him fourteen times in the stomach before inflicting a final wound to his chest.”
I wish I had counted Agent Moses’s stab wounds before jumping the gun, but I honestly don’t think it would have changed my mind. Maddox reacted the way he did because of me, so it’s only fair I take some of the blame.
“You know how much adrenaline you get hit with when survivor instincts kick in, Grayson. It was all a blur. One minute, he was holding my face to the wall while tugging at my panties, the next minute, I was standing over his bloody body.”
A shiver rolls down my spine. There’s too much similarity to my reply for me not to respond. There’s just one difference. In my dreams, Agent Moses ends up dead. In my nightmares, I let my rapist roam free—until today.
My eyes float up to Grayson when he says, “The DA said you’re refusing a physical examination.”
I lift my chin. “He didn’t get to the point of p-penetration…” I stop before I say too much.
Unfortunately, Grayson is more clued on than his handsome face indicates. “Today?”
My chin wobbles before I faintly nod. I’ve kept this secret for over twelve months. It’s time to let it go.
When my woozy head has me mistaking Grayson’s sigh as disappointment, I blubber like a narc. “I reported it the day after it happened. I took it directly to the head of our department. But instead of prosecuting my rapist, he gave him a big fat promotion.”
Grayson doesn’t lecture me about Bureau protocol like his father did or scold me for not going directly to him. He just holds me in his arms like my mascara-stained tears won’t ruin his shirt.
I’m not sure how long we stay huddled in our little bubble. It isn’t long enough for me to feel uncomfortable, but it is long enough for Grayson to make a verdict on his ruling. With Agent Moses dead, he is now the interim supervisor of our division.
After rubbing his thumb under my eyes to clear away the last bit of moisture on my cheeks, he says, “I’ll recommend for the Bureau to suspend youwithpay for six months.”
Money isn’t something I have to worry about, but my badge, that piece of gleaming metal that convinces me I contribute to this world in a positive manner, that means the world to me, so I’m so very grateful it wasn’t immediately stripped from me.
“Before you can come back, you’ll be required to undergo a psych exam.Ifyou pass that, we will slowly ease you back into fieldwork.”
I interweave my fingers to stop me from reacting with violence for the second time today before saying with a pout, “You don’t have to say it like that. I’m not mentally unstable.”
“It’s a pity,” Grayson murmurs with a grin. “The loopy ones have always been my favorite.” He laughs when I sock him in the stomach before he offers me a ride home.
“I’m good, but thank you.”
Blond hair flops into his face when he slants his head to the side. “Do you have somewhere else you need to be?”
I take a moment to acknowledge the unexpected jealousy in his tone before replying, “Yeah. She doesn’t have anyone right now, and I have six months of vacation time.” When Grayson groans, I smile. “I’m joking. I’ll use it wisely. Neither you nor the Bureau can get rid of me that easy.”
When I rub my hand down his arm in an unprofessional manner, it sees me pulling away like his arm set my hand on fire. It did, but that isn’t the point. I took the blame for Agent Moses’s murder because he sexually assaulted me on the clock.
I shouldnotbe objectifying anyone.
The knot in my stomach gets a moment of reprieve when Grayson calls my nickname. “Mace.”
