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"So that's where you inherited your naughtiness," Leila said with a smile.
Fiona smoothed her gloves. "Yes, I suppose I am terribly like him in many ways. Nine brothers and not a one of them seems to—Oh, what am I doing?" she exclaimed. "I meant to stop for only a minute. My coachman will be cross with me for keeping the horses waiting."
She gave Leila a quick hug. "I'll come back as soon as I can. Be sure to write every day, else I shall go mad with boredom."
Without waiting for a reply, she hurried out, unaware she was leaving her friend to go mad with boredom. And loneliness.
At Leila's urging, Andrew had resumed his interrupted business trip to France. She hadn't seen David in at least a week. No one else had visited since the funeral. Except Esmond.
She would not think about him.
She wouldn't think about anyone or anything. All she had to do was keep busy, and she could do that even if she couldn't produce anything of artistic value. She'd had dry spells before. She knew how to fill up the time.
She spent the afternoon building stretchers and the evening tacking canvas to them. The next day she prepared rabbit-skin glue and coated the canvases with it.
The next day she was preparing to apply the next layer—white lead paint mixed with turpentine—when the Earl of Sherburne called.
He was one of the very last people Leila expected—or wanted—to see. On the other hand, she'd seen no one else. Whether the visit boded good or ill, he would at least provide temporary distraction from a mind that refused, despite all the busy work, to stop thinking.
All the same, if the visit proved disagreeable, she would want an excuse to cut it short. Thus Leila's only effort toward making herself presentable was to remove her smock, wash her hands, and push a few loose pins back into the unruly mass of her hair. Sherburne would understand that he'd interrupted her work, and if she chose to get back to it quickly, he would have to understand that as well.
Gaspard having allowed him to wait in the parlor, Leila found His Lordship standing before the curio cabinet, his hands clasped behind him and a frown on his harshly handsome face. He hastily erased the frown, and they exchanged greetings. He offered his condolences. She made the suitable responses. She politely invited him to be seated. He politely declined.
"I do not mean to take up much of your time," he said. "I see that you have been working. I also understand that my presence cannot be altogether agreeable, given what passed the last time I had occasion to visit."
"There's no need to speak of that," she said.
"There is. I am aware that I behaved abominably, Madam," he said. "The quarrel was with...others. It was wrong of me to bring you into it. I have long owed you an apology."
Leila had only to glance once into his countenance to comprehend that the words hadn't come easily to him. His expression was rigidly controlled. As it had been the day he'd mutilated his wife's portrait.
"You paid for the painting," she said. "It was yours to do with as you wished."
"I wish I had not done it," he said.
He wouldn't have, her conscience reminded, if she'd paid attention to what was going on about her.
"I rather wish you hadn't, either," she said. "It was one of my better efforts. But if it worries you so, I can always paint another."
He stared at her for a long moment. "That's...you are—you are very good...generous. I did not..." He put his hand to his forehead. "I fear it cannot be so easily mended. How…awkward. But you are very good. Truly. You have sent my wits begging."
She gestured at the decanter tray. "If you would be so kind as to pour, I shall drink a glass of wine with you. Whether or not a new portrait is possible, we can make friends again, I hope."
She did not care for wine in the middle of the afternoon, but he clearly needed it. She owed him something. Some kind of help, even if it was simply giving him something to do while he recovered his composure.
It did seem to help. By the time he handed her the glass, he seemed fractionally more at ease. Yet she couldn't help wondering if ruining her painting was all that had troubled him. The way he had searched her face—what had he been looking for?
What would the murderer be looking for? she silently amended. Sherburne had by no means been obliged to come, and the visit was difficult for him.
Reasons…not what they seem.
She watched him take a long swallow of wine. "I didn't mean to imply you must make it up to me," she said carefully. "I had guessed you were angry with someone else. I often take out my vexations on inanimate objects."
"It was clear enough who I was angry with, thanks to the spectacle I made of myself that day. It couldn't have been difficult for you to put two and two together." He met her gaze. "I was not the only one who'd been betrayed by my spouse. I was a brute to heap insult upon injury."
"I've long been past that sort of injury," she said. "I wish you would put it behind you as well."
"I should like to know how that's done," he said tightly. "I should like to know how I am to look into my wife's face and pretend nothing has happened, nothing has changed."
She knew too well how it was done. She had done it, in the beginning. This man might not be standing here now if she'd continued to do it, instead of running away.
"You might try recalling the sort of man my husband was," she said. "I strongly doubt Lady Sherburne had any idea what she was getting into. Francis could be...unscrupulous."
He turned away, to the curio cabinet again. "So I learned. The hard way." He paused, and Leila watched his fists clench and unclench.
"It was wrong, very wrong of me to bring you into it," he said. "My only excuse is that I was not altogether rational at the time. There was nothing I could do, you see. Having discovered what he was capable of, I dared take no action, because he might easily retaliate by publicizing the—the details of the episode. I should be made a laughingstock and Sarah should be ruined. Utterly. An intolerable situation. And so I relieved my feelings by destroying your work."
She knew he didn't, entirely, deserve her compassion. He'd betrayed his wife more than once. Yet Leila couldn't help understanding. She knew there rarely was anything anyone could do. Even she had been afraid to leave Francis, afraid of how he might retaliate. He'd not only humiliated this man, but made it impossible for Sherburne to call him to account. Intolerable, yes, it must have been, not to be able to avenge the injury in a duel. Intolerable enough, perhaps, to drive the earl to another sort of revenge.
"At least you paid for the portrait first," she said, crushing a surge of anxiety.
"Indeed, it seems we continue to pay." He turned back to her. "We have had a disagreeable few months. She weeps." He touched his forehead again, and Leila understood that it was a gesture of helplessness and, perhaps, incomprehension. "It is...not pleasant. I much dislike going home. Yesterday was our anniversary. I gave her sapphires. We had people to dinner. What a beastly farce it is."
"Lady Carroll mentioned the sapphires," Leila said gently. "She told me they were very fine and became your wife exceedingly."
"Sarah wept all the same. After the guests left. Again this morning. I wish she would not." He set down his glass. "I should not speak of it."
"Not to me, perhaps," she said, "but to your wife."
"We don't speak, except in company."
He was in pain, and Leila couldn't bear it. Whether or not she could have changed or stopped Francis, damage had been done. It was a debt he'd left behind, and she must pay it, as she would have done financial debts.
"Were the sapphires a—a peace offering?" she asked.
His jaw hardened. "It was our anniversary. I could hardly give her nothing."
She put her own glass down and summoned her courage. "It's none of my affair, of course, but it seems to me that what she wants is forgiveness, not a lot of cold, blue stones. Haven't you both suffered enough? Will you let Francis' unkindness keep you apart forever?"
His mouth set in a thin line. He
didn't want to listen. His pride didn't want to. Yet he remained and did not deliver the setdown Leila so richly deserved. He was a peer of the realm, she a mere bourgeois. He could not be standing there, stock-still, out of a politeness he by no means owed her.
Leila took heart. "Surely you must see that she's sorry for what she did. For your own peace of mind, can you not show her some affection?"
"Affection." His voice was expressionless.
"She's a lovely young woman, my lord. I don't see why that should be so very difficult." She took his hand. "Come, you are older and wiser than she is. Surely you can coax her round?"
He looked down at their clasped hands. Then a very reluctant smile softened his countenance. "I should like to know who's being 'coaxed round' at present," he said. "You possess talents of which I was altogether unaware, Mrs. Beaumont."
She released his hand. "It's not my place to offer advice. It's just that I'm sorry Francis caused so much trouble. I wish I could fix it. I shouldn't blame you for holding a grudge, but I'm greatly relieved that you do not."
"Not against you," he said. "I wanted you to know that."
She assured him she believed him, and they parted not long thereafter, to all appearances, as friends.
Not until he was safely out of the house did she allow herself to sink to the sofa and pray she hadn't made a fatal mistake.
