“According to Luc, it sounds like he wasn’t trying to hurt anyone.”
“Yet good people died because of him.”
“Not directly,” she said softly. “He couldn’t have known the information would be used nefariously. From what Luc said, it sounds like Mateo was just providing a general update. He wasn’t giving specs or helping the Sentinels plan an attack.”
“No, but he lied to us afterward and framed Clara.”
“Because Osiris told him to.”
“I’m not sure that excuses any of it.” Balthazar’s abdomen clenched as he pushed off the counter. “Betrayal destroys trust. It’s hard to come back from that.”
There was a hint of something else in those words.
A statement that went beyond Mateo and applied directly to her.
Because she’d altered his memories, thereby betraying him to an extent. Yet he’d just told Luc that he trusted her.
“As I said, sometimes things are done with the right intentions in mind. That doesn’t mean they’re correct. It just means the reasoning behind the actions weren’t nefarious or cruel in nature.” His quiet tone hit her right in the heart.
“I had to protect Stas.”
“At my expense. At the expense of us. At the expense of a future that may never be the same.” He shook his head, his disappointment palpable as he started toward her. “You could have tried to trust me instead. But you chose the path for us without even attempting to confide in me.”
“Balthazar…”
“Shh,” he hushed, his fingertip brushing her lips. “I’m not saying I don’t trust you, Lee. I’m saying it takes time to recover from a betrayal. It can be a difficult path to navigate. But not an impossible one.”
He leaned forward to gently press his mouth to hers.
An apology threatened her thoughts, her heart panging uncomfortably in her chest.
Because he was right.
She could have tried to talk to him.
Instead, she’d chosen to suffer on her own and remove herself from his mind. He was never supposed to know. It was her burden to bear, not his.
Yet now he knew.
And she could feel the disappointment radiating off him in waves of punishing regret.
“It’s not my intent to truly punish you, Lee,” he whispered. “I understand why you did it. But now we both have to live with the consequences of that decision.”
“I didn’t want to hurt you.”
“I know.”
“I… You weren’t supposed to know.”
“That almost makes it worse,” he murmured, his palm cupping her cheek. “Those memories were for us to enjoy, not for you to remember alone.”
He kissed her again, more intently this time, with his tongue leading the way. It wasn’t forgiveness. Nor was it an apology. Just something in between. An intangible sensation. A new path forward, one created by mutual desire and a yearning to learn more.
Leela’s soul rejoiced deep inside, spreading foreign warmth to her veins and reminding her of something important. Something she should remember. A moment in the past. An impossible connection that she didn’t understand.
It was there and gone in a flash, the recollection disappearing into the abyss and leaving her chasing after the ghost of a sensation.
What was that?she marveled, breathless. It left alarm bells ringing in her head, cascading goose bumps down her arms and legs. It had felt so real. So improbable. So—
