I’d been so close to losing control yesterday, a sensation I’d never experienced in my very long life. I thrived at being in charge, but Kayla… she made me feel wildly inept, like I couldn’t tell up from down.
I ran a hand over my face, preparing myself for seeing her again. It would take serious restraint not to grab her and kiss her as though I had every right to do so.
Which I should.
She was my fucking mate.
But I’d ruined all chances of us having a normal courtship when I’d abandoned her in Hell.
A twinge of guilt—also a new sensation—clawed at my insides, encouraging me to apologize. However, I knew it would never be enough.
I also wouldn’t entirely mean it.
The balance had to come first. Always.
Except a very selfish part of me… wanted Kayla to come first. Just this once. Just for us.
I swallowed, palming the back of my neck, and glanced up at the ceiling of my kitchen.
Which was, of course, how Kayla found me.
She cleared her throat, a note of amusement touching her lips as I met her gaze.
It immediately made me suspicious.
“What did you do?” I asked.
She shrugged. “Nothing.”
I narrowed my eyes, then glanced around the too-clean kitchen. She’d clearly eaten in here, and recently, too.
Which meant she’d found the leftovers from my midnight snack.
I opened the fridge, confirming it, and just shook my head. “I had plans for that salad.”
“And those plans were positively delicious, too,” she drawled.
I fought the urge to smile and lost as I caught her proud expression. “Well. At least you like something about me.”
Her dark eyes glittered, her lips curling. “Don’t get cocky, Archangel.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it.” I pulled out a bunch of fruit, some juice, and a powder from the pantry, then went to work making a meal smoothie.
Kayla crept forward and hopped up onto the counter beside where I was working, her long, jean-covered legs crossing at her boot-clad ankles.
I doubled my portions without asking her, preparing her the same liquid lunch for our trip to Nashville. I’d reached out to Zebulon early this morning, and he’d provided me with the contact I needed, saying he would be awaiting our arrival.
I’d recognized the name as one at the top of Kayla’s list of Nephilim.Gleason. He’d grown exponentially in power, marking him as a suspect. But I’d learned from Zebulon that he’d also been the one to help compile the list, which downgraded my suspicion to mere curiosity.
“We’re meeting Gleason in Nashville in an hour,” I said before hitting the button to blend all the items together.
Kayla merely watched the ingredients spin around in the glass, her expression giving nothing away. However, the dark circles beneath her gaze suggested she’d slept about as well as I had.
I placed my palm on her thigh, curious to see how she’d react.
She startled, glancing down at it and then up at me with an arched brow, still silent.
Deciding to test these new boundaries, I leaned forward to press my lips to hers while holding her gaze. She didn’t kiss me back, but she didn’t move away either.
