“Do you remember escaping the throne room?With me?”Rathiel’s voice grew almost eager, eyes searching mine for any hint of recognition.
I frowned deeply, closing my eyes against the pounding that began in my skull.“Escaping with you?No.That never happened.At least, I don’t think so.I don’t remember—no.You…you weren’t there.Or were you?Maybe?I can’t—” Agony assaulted my skull, and I dug my fingers into my hair with a frustrated groan.“Please…don’t make me try to remember.It hurts.”
Silence.
When the agony finally receded, I opened my eyes to find Rathiel staring at me, a different kind of pain alight in his gaze.He instantly blinked it away, but I’d seen that flash.Just as I was about to ask him about it, I realized something.Something that had my heart dropping to my feet.
His question…the way he’d worded it.
Before you arrived on Earth, what do you remember?
Such an odd way to phrase that question.
“How did you know?”I murmured, one piece of the puzzle suddenly coming together in my head.
“Know what?”He cleared his throat and averted his gaze—a clear sign he was nervous.
“How did you know I can’t remember everything?”I repeated, my words loud and pulsing with rage.When he didn’t respond, I kept pushing.“You wouldn’t have phrased your question that way if you didn’t already know.”
Rathiel grimaced, his jaw tightening.
My blood boiled.“Answer me!”I snapped, pushing Purrgatory off my lap as I stood, fists clenched at my sides.“How did you know?”
He didn’t speak.Then, with a sigh, he raised his hands, as though trying to calm a raging storm.“Lily, let me explain.It’s not what you think.”
Oh, I had a feeling it wasexactlywhat I thought.But I wanted to hear it directly from him.“Spit.It.Out,” I commanded.
After a deep breath, he nodded.“Before you arrived on Earth, some of your memories were erased to protect you.”
“Protect me,” I repeated with a dry laugh.“Who did it?Who wiped my memories?”
Rathiel’s expression shuttered, and he lowered his gaze.The silence that followed was suffocating, thick with tension, as if the air itself held its breath.
“You,” I whispered.“It was you, wasn’t it?”
ChapterEleven
The guiltin Rathiel’s eyes told me everything I needed to know.After ten years of wondering, here it was.The truth.And it shattered me.
“You bastard,” I choked out, taking a single step toward him, my hands trembling with the urge to strike.“You had no right.Were you the one who sent me here, too?”
“I had to,” he said quietly, his voice barely audible.“It was the only way to save your life.”
His words rattled in my skull, bouncing around like some cruel joke.I scrubbed my hands down my face, trying to make sense of the chaos in my mind.“Start from the beginning, Rathiel.And if I don’t like what you have to say, so help me, we’ll find out what happens when I burn you alive.”
Rathiel’s face hardened, the guilt in his eyes replaced by a steely resolve.“You have to understand, Lilith.You were a threat to Lucifer.A powerful one.If you remembered everything, you would have killed yourself trying to get back to Hell.I couldn’t let that happen.”
My eyes narrowed.“Rememberwhat, exactly?What was so important that you had to erase it?”
Rathiel sighed, defeat slumping his shoulders.Finally—finally—he spoke.“You led a rebellion against your father.You rallied the strongest, the fiercest, the most vicious to fight against Lucifer’s tyranny.You nearly succeeded, too, but in the end, he crushed your forces.He destroyed everything you built.And then…he crushedyou.He tore off your wings and was about to obliterate you.I couldn’t let that happen.”
The words hit like a hammer to my chest, knocking the air from my lungs.“I…led a rebellion?”I whispered, the words foreign and strange on my tongue.
The idea of standing against my father, the most powerful being I’d ever known, seemed absurd.Yet, the conviction in Rathiel’s eyes told me it was true.My stomach churned as I considered his words, and I couldn’t reconcile what he said with the person I thought I was.
“I hate my father, yes,” I said, my voice shaking.“And yeah, I’ve broken his rules and defied him every chance I got.But lead a rebellion?Fight against him?No…that’s not me.”
“Except it is,” Rathiel assured me.“You proved to be the strongest among us all.A true warrior.You led us.You gave us hope.I just wish we’d won the fight.”
