“No, Rathiel.I want themback.”I snarled, fury sparking in every word.“You don’t know what it’s like to forget who you are.You talk about me like I’m some great hero—but I don’t remember her!I don’tfeellike her.She’s a stranger to me.You invaded my mind and you stole who I was, and now you’re telling me I’ll never get that back?”
He opened his mouth to speak, but I cut him off, voice trembling with the force of my rage.“You had your reasons, fine.I understand that.But the only way you can even begin to make this right is by helping me get those memories back.Promise me you’ll help.”
“You don’t need those memories to be strong, Lilith,” Rathiel said, his voice firm.“You’re still the same person.A warrior.A leader.The memories may be gone, but the essence of who you are—that hasn’t changed.You don’t need them to fight.”
I shook my head, disbelief flooding my veins.“So what?I’m supposed to just…forget about them?Pretend this is all fine and move on?”
“I’m saying we need to focus on what’s ahead of us.On stopping Lucifer.On fulfilling your destiny.We can’t change what’s happened, but we can still fight for the future.”
Frustration bubbled over, and I glared at him, my voice raw.“This ismylife you’re talking about, Rathiel.You took everything from me.Everything.You had no right.”
He reached out, hesitating before resting a hand on my shoulder.“I know,” he said softly.“And I’m sorry.But right now, we need to stop Lucifer.That’s the priority.Once that’s done, we can talk about your memories.”
I jerked away, unwilling to let him off the hook so easily.“Fine,” I snapped.“But this conversation isn’t over.When this is done—Lucifer, the prophecy, all of it—we’re going after that relic.”
Rathiel nodded, his expression solemn.“Agreed.”
I took a deep breath.We had bigger problems to deal with right now, so I had to push my emotions down into the deepest, darkest pit inside.
“You can sleep on the couch,” I muttered, turning toward my bedroom.I paused, glancing back over my shoulder, my voice sharp and low.“But don’t think for a second this means I forgive you.”
Pain flashed across in his face, but he eventually nodded.
I turned my back on him and headed to my room.No matter how angry I was—and I wasincrediblyangry—Rathiel and I had to work together.But once this was over, he and I were going to have a long conversation about everything.And if he ever pulled a stunt like this again, I would shove a stake so far deep into his chest, he’d be coughing up splinters for eternity.
ChapterTwelve
I slipped into my bedroom,threw my purse in the corner, then pinched the bridge of my nose.Questions echoed in my head, and my temples throbbed.Ten years of uncertainty, of speculating and imagining all the worst-case scenarios, and not once had I ever imagined this.Finally, after waiting for so long, I had my answers, and honestly, I had no idea what to make of it all.
Rathiel had taken my memories, my home, my life, and all because he cared about some stupid prophecy.And Lucifer—he’d taken my wings, stripping me down until all that remained was this empty shell who barely recognized herself.My life in Hell had been brutal, but it’d beenmine.
Betrayal, anger, and a deep sense of loss filled me.How was I supposed to reconcile the fact that the vamp who’d trained me and taught me to fight had also robbed me of everything that made meme?What was I supposed to do now?
I stopped in front of a small, crooked mirror sitting on my dresser and stared at my reflection.But the more I stared at it, the less familiar it felt.I wasn’t sure who I was anymore.Rathiel said I led the rebellion, but that idea was ludicrous, right?The LilyIknew would never have raised a hand against her father, let alone an army.Even in my wildest imagination, I never would have envisionedthatscenario.
And I still couldn’t believe thatRathielhad been the one to exile me.
For some reason, that hurt a hell of a lot more than believing Lucifer had done it—which only confused me more.I’d never given a crap about what Rathiel thought of me.So why did I care so much now?Why did this betrayal hurt so badly?
I rubbed my brow and quietly swore.I’d been looking forward to my date with Jack all week.I’d gone shopping, bought a nice dress…only for Rathiel to waltz in and upend my entire life.For that reason alone, I wanted to sock him in the balls so hard, he coughed up his testicles.
A part of me—the logical, more reasonable side—reminded myself that Rathiel hadn’t had it easy either.He’d survived ten years of torture.Most would have cracked in far less time.I recognized that, and I empathized.My father was a masterful artist when it came to the torturous arts.But the other part of me—the vindictive, vengeful side—couldn’t ignore that we were only in this positionbecauseof Rathiel.He’d fucked up my life six ways from Sunday, then let my father capture him.
Sighing, I sat on my bed before flopping backward into a pile of thin, cheap pillows.I wasn’t given much time to wallow though, thanks to the sudden chiming of my phone.
I hauled my ass back up and retrieved my phone from my purse.
A quick text popped up on my screen.
Jack: Did you make it home safely?
Interestingly, my rage and frustration quieted at the sight of his name, and a small smile graced my lips.Unlocking my screen, I opened the chat and typed out my response.
Me: Sorry, I meant to text you.I did make it home, thank you.And thank you for dinner tonight.I really did have a lot of fun.
The three dots appeared, and I patiently waited for Jack’s response to pop up.
Jack: Glad to hear it.Would I be insane to invite you out again?Maybe this time without your long-lost cousin—I assume?—interrupting our evening?
