“He relaxed. He was stiff, like someone was holding a pistol to his head, but then halfway through the dance, he… loosened. And not only that, he became a better dancer than I would have expected. He even smiled at me—twice! And by the end, I could’ve sworn he enjoyed it.”
“Perhaps he did.”
I scoffed. “I think he must’ve had some sort of fit. Or maybe it’s just his nature to be strange. But then—” I paused, trying to make sense of it all. “The way he looked at me, Jane. It wasn’t… normal. He looked at me like he was trying to figure something out. I am sure he disdains me mightily, but there were these strange times when it was almost as if—well, as if he was attracted to me.”
Jane gave me a knowing look. “That’s hardly impossible, Lizzy.”
“Impossible or not,” I said quickly, “I don’t trust it. The man behaves erratically. One moment, he’s glaring at the world and cursing at shadows, and the next, he’s practically dancing a jig. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he’s mad.”
“Perhaps he is simply trying to find his place among strangers.”
“Oh, Jane,” I said, shaking my head with a laugh. “You wouldn’t speak harshly of Napoleon Bonaparte himself!”
She smiled and shrugged. “I only think we should be cautious in our judgments. Mr. Darcy may surprise you yet.”
“He’s already surprised me, but I can’t say any of it has been pleasant,” I replied, leaning back against the bedpost. “If there’s more to him, I’m not sure I want to find out.”
Twelve
Elizabeth
“Lizzy, do hurry up!”Lydia’s voice rang out ahead of me as she and Kitty scurried down the road, their bonnets already askew despite having just left the house. “The officers won’t wait forever!”
“They’re hardly waiting at all,” I muttered under my breath, quickening my pace to catch up. If my sisters could only summon half this energy for household tasks, our home would be a far more pleasant place. But alas, the mention of redcoats seemed to summon a frantic enthusiasm that nothing else could.
Behind me, Mr. Collins lumbered along, out of breath.
Oh, right. Mr. Collins. The walk to Meryton the next day might have been pleasant—if not for our houseguest.
It was Papa’s fault. Mr. Collins had arrived the evening before, as expected, and he had been just as ridiculous as anyone could have hoped. So ridiculous was he that, this morning, when Kitty and Lydia proposed a walk into the village to cleanse our palates somewhat, Papa agreed that sounded like a fine notion. And he compelled Mr. Collins to offer to escort us.
He trundled along beside us, puffing out his chest like a rooster on parade, all while spouting endless praise for Lady Catherine de Bourgh, a woman none of us had ever heard of before last night, but about whom we now knew everything—from how she took her tea to her opinions on garden sculptures. I couldn’t quite decide if I pitied or despised him for his mindless devotion.
“And you must know,” he said, gesturing vaguely toward the landscape, “Lady Catherine always recommends a brisk walk as a remedy for the constitution. It is an activity that improves both body and spirit.”
“Of course,” I said dryly, exchanging a glance with Jane, who was clearly trying her best to keep a straight face. “A walk always does wonders.” It might do a wonder or two for Mr. Collins, at least, for he could hardly manage to talk and move his feet at the same time, as both seemed to demand all the air in his body.
Kitty and Lydia were already giggling. Mary, however, was nodding along, probably thinking this was exactly the sort of thing she’d read in one of her moral books.
“I daresay,” Mr. Collins continued, oblivious to the barely concealed laughter behind him, “that Lady Catherine herself would find this village quite charming. She is, of course, a woman of unparalleled taste and judgment, and I feel certain she would take an interest in the welfare of the local inhabitants.”
The way he spoke of Lady Catherine, you’d think she was the ruler of half the country and not some distant benefactor of his. I opened my mouth to make some biting comment but thoughtbetter of it. He seemed beyond reason, and it was hardly worth the effort.
I sighed, wishing I could shake Mr. Collins’ company, but it seemed bothersome men were to be my lot this month. Another, far more vexing figure kept lingering at the edges of my thoughts—Mr. Darcy. His manner even more imposing, his behavior, even more baffling. One moment he seemed determined to avoid me, and the next, he looked as though he were on the verge of saying something important, only to think better of it. If he disliked me so much, why did he always seem so… double-minded when I was around?
“Lizzy!” Kitty called again, dragging me out of my thoughts. “Don’t dawdle! We might miss them!”
“Miss them?” I hurried to catch up. “We don’t even know if they’ll be in town.”
Lydia tossed her head. “If they’re not in town, we’ll wait. They have to come through eventually.” Lydia’s logic was about as flawless as her embroidery—which was to say, nonexistent.
“If only you applied this level of perseverance to your music lessons,” I quipped, earning a giggle from Kitty and an eye roll from Lydia.
“Music won’t secure me a husband, Lizzy,” Lydia replied, tossing her head dramatically. “But a red coat might!”
Behind me, Mr. Collins caught up somewhat. “Miss Elizabeth, while I admire your light-hearted spirit, Lady Catherine would never approve of such frivolity. A woman’s chief duty, as Lady Catherine has often remarked, is to secure the admiration ofrespectablemen through modesty and propriety.”
“Well, Mr. Collins,” I said sweetly, not turning around, “I imagine Lady Catherine must be a paragon of both.”
