“It is scarcely seven, Mrs Fitzwilliam. I hope you slept well.”
She edged carefully into a seat at the breakfast table and started to reach for a teakettle when the footman pre-empted her and poured it. She waited for him to finish, smiling uncomfortably all the while, and then stared at the cup.
“Sir,” she began again, “last night…”
“I hope you were not up reading into the wee hours,” he interrupted. “Sure to harm your eyesight, Mrs Fitzwilliam.”
She was looking at him quizzically, but he flicked his eyes toward the footman, and she drew a breath as if she understood. “I am afraid I was up far later than I should have been, sir.”
“Must have been a particularly engrossing book, I imagine?”
She sampled her tea, lingering over it a moment before answering. “Gripping, I should say. Quite terrifying—I really ought to try different reading material before bed.”
“Ah, well, no harm done,” he assured her, and folded his paper. “Perhaps we can find in my library a better means of comforting you to sleep, but first, I suggest some exercise to clear your head. Samuel—” He gestured to the footman. “Will you please go to the stables and ask John to saddle my hunter this morning? And have the side-saddle placed on the bay mare, as well.”
Elizabethshiveredintheautumn damp as they set out over fields still kissed by frosty dew. How vastly different the English chill was from the dry, biting cold of the plains she had once called home. No wind tormented here for nine months of the year, but the grey sky overhead was just as oppressive to the spirits.
“Are you warm enough, Mrs Fitzwilliam?” Mr Darcy asked from beside her.
“I will be soon. Mr Darcy, it was kind of you to think of my amusement this morning, but if you have other business, I hope I do not keep you long.”
A smile tugged at the near side of his mouth. “On the contrary, I can think of no more invigorating start to my morning. In my youth, I was in the saddle by dawn, rain or shine, and always the more contented afterwards for having taken a bit of exercise before other affairs commanded my day. I have missed that habit. You will probably find it necessary to tell me when you wish to turn back, rather than depending on me to be responsible. For this once, anyway.”
She tried to answer with an easy laugh, but only sat tightly, still trying to disguise her shivers. “Sir, I appreciate your delicacy and patience, but I feel I must speak.”
He nodded but did not turn to face her—a thing she was glad of, for it made him less intimidating for the moment.
“I—I think I said something last night about experiencing nightmares,” she began.
“You have them frequently?”
“They are nothing to be concerned about,” she answered quickly.
“I should think they are. You were in a fearful state last night. Truly, you looked most distressed.”
“Oh, no, it was… that is merely the way of it. Sometimes I recall a… something that happened, that is all. You know, life on a ranch is not so polite as it is here.”
He frowned and looked over at her. “No, I do not know. In fact, I feel I know very little. Tell me what it was like, for I have no picture in my head of your home.”
She clamped her lip between her teeth and thought of what shecouldsafely tell him. “Well, I… I suppose it would seem very primitive to you. We had two wells, with a pump in the kitchen, so we were thought quite well to do. Papa raised the very finest bloodstock around, and we could afford enough help that we girls did nothaveto tend the herds, but we chose to. Jane and I did, that is.”
“And you were the savage one,” he guessed with a teasing smirk.
“As to that, I did have something of a… a reputation.” Her brow creased, and she looked off to the horizon.
“Mrs Fitzwilliam, does it distress you to speak of it?” he asked gently.
She cleared her throat. “Distressed is not the right word. I miss them so!”
“I could not account you a rational person if you did not. Please, tell me anything that comforts you, but do not feel obliged to relate that which might be troubling to you. Why not tell me something of pleasant memories?”
“But are you not hoping to learn why I was thrashing about last night?”
That careful smile reappeared on his face. “That is what I was hoping, but if it is too much…”
She shook her head dismissively, trying to make light of it. “No. I… perhaps you wish to know how we lost everything.”
“I am curious, yes.”
