“What do you know?” Lydia harrumphed. “I have it on good authority that you cheated him out of a fortune, Mr. Darcy!”
I saw Fitzwilliam’s shoulders lift in a long-suffering sigh. Then he shot a piercing glare at Mr. Wickham.
“Well, now,” he stammered, “I suppose that is not… notpreciselytrue, Darcy old boy.” He licked his lips and looked at Lydia again. “Perhaps I did embellish here and there.”
“Miss Lydia, if you would be so kind, I have business with the lieutenant here which may distress you. If you would grant us but a moment, please allow me to present you a small token of my appreciation.” He extended something to her, and I sawher figure straighten. “Perhaps you would like a new winter bonnet?”
“Well!” she exclaimed. “I suppose you are not half so bad as I had thought. I will be back straightaway, of course. What of it, my dear Wickham? I think something with a bright green ribbon under my cheek would be so very jolly.”
Lydia flounced away, and I stepped back around the carriage door, not desiring that she should see me and come over. I was too painfully interested in what Fitzwilliam had to say to Mr. Wickham.
“I suppose you mean to run me out of the country,” accused the unhappy lieutenant. “What took you so long, Darcy?”
“The choice of where to go is yours. I will merely provide the means.”
Wickham leaned against the wall. “How do you intend to do that?”
“Your shopkeeper’s debts in Meryton are paid, and I am willing to arrange for any debts of honor you have incurred while here. In exchange for this, you will repair to London immediately and present yourself to Colonel Fitzwilliam. He will handle the purchasing of a commission into the Regulars, in the available regiment of your choice.”
Mr. Wickham was silent, then; “And if I refuse?”
“I will hold your debts.”
The gasp of dread was audible even from where I stood. “I see. You really went out of your way this time, Darcy. Why now? I have not breathed a word about our little disagreement last summer. One might think I was getting a little too close to your turf again. Is that it? I was having a bit of fun with that Bennet chit, and you have your eye on the Bingley widow?”
My spine prickled, and I stopped breathing, dying to know how he would answer. Of course, he would admit to no such thing, even if it were true… even if I longed for it to be true. Whywould he expose himself to the contempt of a man he already despised just to claim an interest in a woman who was not his social equal? Even if he did nurse such a sentiment, no good could come from him confessing it.
“I do not profess to be worthy of Elizabeth Bingley,” Fitzwilliam answered tightly. “But I ever did win her for my bride, would you truly wish to have me as a brother-in-law? For I assure you, I would not suffer you to ruin that girl and again escape the demands of honor.”
I do not remember anything after that. There were a few words about arrangements, a threat or two, then Fitzwilliam fairly chased Mr. Wickham from the alley so the rascal would not be there when Lydia came back. Then he gave a jerk of his hat, as if satisfied in a deed finally accomplished, and walked up the street. He never saw me, standing behind the door of the carriage, with my heart in my throat and my eyes full of tears.
He had done this for me! Bearing all the mortification of hunting down Mr. Wickham’s debts, as though he were responsible for the man, and potentially opening the door to gossip about why the powerful Mr. Darcy would want to hush up and send away the winsome lieutenant—he had done it to protect my sister and others, and to please me! I was sure of it! If it had been merely the “right thing to do,” he would not have spoken about me as he had… but speak he did, and I was determined to say a few words of my own.
As soon as I could get him alone.
Fourteen
Idid heed Richard’sadvice on one or two points over the next couple of weeks. Matters I had dreaded were finally settled to my satisfaction, and I felt, at last, I had the right to hold my head erect. I fancy that Elizabeth might have perceived my angst while I was yet in the midst, for so often that week I would look her way, my heart panging achingly against my ribs for what I thought I could not have, and she would reward me with an instant’s smile. It was only the compassionate smile of a friend, but it was manna to me. Surely, she could not know how it encouraged me, inspired me to learn to be the man she deserved. Perhaps that shared glance mattered a good deal less to her, but to me, it was the ray of light I sorely craved.
We did engage in a few more chess battles, most of which I permitted her to win. It was worth it to see the wicked gleam in her eye as she flashed me that cheeky look of triumph. It was worth anything, just to bow my head over the same board, our hands nearly touching, the sweet smell of lavender water soothing me even as her quickness and ready humor exhilarated me. But it was only a shadow of what I really wanted fromher. Another playful kiss… I would not have let such a chance pass me again without pulling her to my chest and showing her precisely what her previous kisses had wrought. But I had no such opportunity.
Christmastide was fast approaching when I came back to Netherfield one day, after having completed an obligation that had been too long in the waiting. The relief of that duty, slipping from my shoulders, nearly made me skip like a youth as I bounded through the front door. I looked for Elizabeth at once, but I was told she was out. Charles had gone to Longbourn for the afternoon—not much of a surprise, as he had failed to heed my cautions about falling in love with Jane Bennet.
Eventually, I joined Georgiana in her sitting room and watched her paint. I never told her anything about my business in town that morning, because there was no need. She was starting to learn happiness again, and that was all I truly desired. These days, she is Countess de Tourney at the center of the London scene, but that afternoon, she was simply my sweet little sister once more, and that was enough.
So relaxed was I, and perfectly unaware of the hour, that I was ignorant of what was taking place downstairs. Later I learned that the servants were looking for me, but no one thought to search Georgiana’s private rooms. I came down, whistling and straightening my coat, thinking Elizabeth would be returned by then, but I was rudely arrested on the stair by the sound of someone shouting my name from the drawing-room.
“Fitzwilliam Darcy and my daughter are formed for one another! Since their cradles, his mother and I planned their union. You have no decency if you could dream of pretending to such a lofty status. It cannot be borne—it shall not be!”
Lady Catherine!My blood turned to ice, and I gripped the banister to stumble down as fast as my clumsy feet could carry me. My aunt had always nursed some fantasy that I was engagedto my cousin Anne, though I had never encouraged her. And now, for some reason, she had come to Netherfield, thinking to stake her claim to me and warn Elizabeth off! She seemed to care little who might overhear because the halls of the house echoed with her contempt.
“Are you engaged to him?” my aunt thundered.
I was still racing across the entry hall, my boots skidding on the polished floors. I know the servants were gawking at me, and Heaven only knows what was said of me later, but I was in a blind panic to keep my aunt from destroying that which I had not yet built.
“No,” I heard Elizabeth answer.
Ten more steps. I could make it!
