“I like Nola,” Jacob said. “Dad’s so happy, he’s even humming Christmas songs to himself.”
“Right? I haven’t seen him this happy in a long time. It sucks that we have to leave tomorrow.”
“They could try the long-distance thing.”
Maddie’s sigh was loud enough to be heard over the guys chattering about whether or not they wanted to grab sandwiches. “Dad said it would never work out because his life is in Connecticut and hers is here, which is a bummer, but at least he’s happy while he’s here. Maybe it’ll encourage him to try dating back home.”
Ouch. She pretended to shift the bottles of soda around in her arms, as if they were slipping, to buy herself a few seconds to let the pain roll over her. Not that the news her time with Ian was coming to an end was a shock. But the idea that she’d gotten Ian back on the horse so he could ride off into the sunset with some other woman didn’t feel great.
“Let me help with that,” Ian said from right next to her, and she sucked in a breath as he took one of the soda bottles that actually was slipping. “It’s going to be a few minutes and she said she’ll call my name, so we may as well sit down.”
Forcing a smile she hoped passed for genuine, she handed him two of the sodas and did her best to shove the surge of emotions down deep. She didn’t want Jacob and Maddie to know she’d overheard them talking, and she definitely didn’t want Ian to know the conversation had happened.
Both kids smiled at her when they reached the table, and remembering that they really did like her helped her own smile feel less forced. She’d never felt the desire for children of her own, but she could easily see herself with these two young adults in her life.
And she needed to back that truck up before she started sobbing into her soda.
“Where are we going after we eat?” Maddie asked, and the subsequent unfolding of the map and navigational chatter was a welcome distraction.
Nola pointed to a spot on the map about halfway between where they were now and the lodge. “There’s a pull-off around there that has pretty views. I think Maddie would like to take some pictures there.”
By the time they’d finished eating and hit the restrooms again, Nola had shaken off her earlier mood and was ready to enjoy the rest of the day. She knew what she’d signed up for—she’d enjoyed her slice of cake, but she couldn’t have the whole thing.
Clearly Ian had figured out Nola knew how to handle a snowmobile because he kicked the speed up a notch when they left the gas station. It was exhilarating and she told herself that, even though it wouldn’t be the same without Ian, she needed to make a point of riding more often.
The miles passed in a blur, and she loved watching Ian ride. Even though she stayed a safe distance back, she could see the way his body moved as he was going into a corner. And she recognized the twitch of his helmet every time he looked in his mirror to make sure the correct number of headlights.
“Your cheeks are pink,” he told her when they’d stopped at the pull-off so Maddie could take some pictures. “You’re not cold, are you? Am I going too fast?”
“Too fast for Nola?” Jacob snorted. “I think you should letherlead so maybe we can get home before dark.”
Nola laughed with them, appreciating that she’d earned a spot in the Emerson family trash-talking. “I’m not cold and you’re not going too fast for me. I’m just having fun.”
When the kids wandered down a path beaten in the snow because Maddie wanted a different angle for her shot, Ian pulled Nola close. As he lowered his mouth to hers, their breath mingled in one frosty cloud and she closed her eyes to savor this perfect moment.
After kissing her until she wondered if the snow would melt around their feet, he put his arm around her shoulder and held her, looking out at the view of the snow-covered trees and small mountains in the distance. “This is a beautiful spot. Thanks for pointing it out. Jacob loves snowmobiling and I guess Maddie does, too, but I think for her it’s more about getting out here to see stuff like this.”
“I thought she might like it here.” His body shifted and she looked up to find him watching her with a thoughtful expression. “What?
“How has some guy in this town not been lucky enough to be yours?”
“I guess I’ve just been waiting.”
“Waiting for what?”
For you.The words snagged in her throat and she swallowed hard. She should say them—just put it out there—but she couldn’t muster the courage.Dad said it would never work out…“I don’t know. I just never met the right guy at the right time.”
As she watched, some of the sparkle went out of his eyes, though his smile didn’t dim. They could hear the kids’ voices getting louder as they came back from their exploration, so he said nothing, but he didn’t have to say what he was feeling. She felt it, too.
Ian was definitely the right guy.
But it wasn’t the right place and time.
Eight
Tuesday, the 22ndof December
The creakingof an old wooden floorboard—it was almost more of a groan—as Ian put weight on it sounded as if it actually echoed off the walls of the quiet lodge, and he winced as he made his way to the kitchen.
