Willow makes a little noise, agreeing. Her gaze rests on me. “Why don’t you come to the farm? Grandma Maggie and Ray are coming over for supper. You should join us.”
My gaze continues to follow my granddaughter. “Oh, I don’t know. I really need to go over to my house and mow tonight.”
Willow reaches out and touches my arm.
“I’m not very good company these days,” I tell her before she starts in on me.
“Your presence alone is enough.”
The wind blows, and Aspen lifts her face. Her eyelids flutter, and I smile. She reminds me so much of her grandmother.
“Please,” Willow begs. “I’ll make Jackson go over to your place and mow.”
Willow might look sweet, but she also plays dirty. She knows I’ll grab on to any excuse to avoid going over to my house.
I run my hand through my hair and chuckle. “Okay, you’ve got a deal.”
She claps her hands and then gives me a kiss on the cheek. “Supper is at six unless you want to come with us now and help me with this little turd.”
Aspen plucks a flower out of the concrete vase on my wife’s headstone. She sits down on the ground and begins to pull the petals off one by one. “Love me.” She smiles as she picks another petal. “No love,” she mutters to herself, her mouth turning down into a frown. The next petal makes her smile again. “Love me.”
“Who taught her that?” I scold gently.
Willow laughs. “It wasn’t me. It was Kelsie.”
“How can I say no to an afternoon with my grandbaby?” I walk over to pick her up. “How ‘bout a ride on Papa’s shoulders?” I ask her.
Instantly, she stands and raises her arms to me, the flower quickly forgotten. The sun glints off something on Rachel’s headstone, and I’m temporarily blinded as I bend over to pick up my granddaughter. It’s an amethyst.
I straighten with my granddaughter in my arms and quickly pocket the crystal. Aspen curls against me and lays her head on my shoulder.
“Aw, she’s getting sleepy. I don’t know if she’ll make it on your shoulders,” Willow says, stepping up beside us.
I laugh. “You’re probably right there.”
Aspen rubs her eyes.
“Do you still have a car seat in the truck? We don’t have to walk back.”
I start to head to where I parked. “Sure do.”
My heart beats fast as we make our way down the hill toward my truck. I’m losing my fucking mind. It’s just a rock. It doesn’t mean a fucking thing.
Willow buckles Aspen in after I gently set her in the car seat. “Papa,” she cries, holding her hands out to me.
“Papa’s going with us,” Willow assures her.
She falls asleep as soon as I put the truck in motion. The farm is just a short drive down the county road.
“Your brother is really coming along on their house, isn’t he?” I say as I pass by his place. It’s my best attempt at small talk. That’s what life is right now. I’m always trying to make everyone think I’m okay. I mean, I am okay. I’m just not … well, I’m just not anything. I’m here, and that’s all I can muster for the time being.
“He really is. Ash is hoping to get it done before their wedding.”
“Is he going to try and sell their tiny house?”
“Um, I don’t know.” She bites her lip and turns to look out her window.
Willow is the worst liar I’ve ever seen. It’s because she doesn’t do it often. It makes me chuckle. “It’s a secret, huh?”
