I dropped into the chair again, elbows on my knees.
“I can’t stop thinking about her,” I admitted, voice hoarse. “She’s always in my mind. I’m fucking up, focused on her.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, seeing the cracks I left behind. Waiting outside Mekhi’s office. Taking Steel’s car. The cameras I forgot to avoid. The phone call that was too long, too bold. Mistakes piling on mistakes. I wasn’t being careful. I wasn’t thinking clear. And it was because of her.
“They gon’ figure it out,” I whispered. “If I keep making noise like this… they gon’ find me.”
My mother leaned in, voice sweet in my ear. “Then act first.”
My throat tightened. “I don’t want to hurt her.”
“No, no,” she cooed. “Not her, baby. Never her.”
She stood in front of me and began a slow rub of my temples. I almost moaned with relief.
“You were robbed. And now you see the boy livingyourlife with the girl who should beyours.”
“She don’t even know I exist.”
“She will,” my mother insisted. “After you get rid of Mekhi. Right now, she completes him. You make her yours, she’ll complete you.”
I closed my eyes, letting myself see the beautiful illusion, letting it wrap around me tight. Me and Farrah. Her soft voice saying my name. Her sunlight melting the cold that was always in my chest. That fantasy was better than anything real.
But Mekhi stood in the way.
Always him. Always the golden son. Always blessed. Always beloved.
Always on top.
My mother’s voice broke through the haze, soft and evil.
“You want your father’s legacy back?”
I swallowed.
“You want the life you were denied?”
My hands curled into fists.
“You want the girl?”
I inhaled sharply.
“Then take it.”
She leaned close enough that her breath hit my cheek.
“And you start,” she whispered, “with him.”
The morningafter the shooting and the carjacking, my mind wasn’t right. I couldn’t sleep. All I could do was watch Farrah curled against me, soft, warm, and safe. That safety could disappear so fast if Trell got his way. The nigga was escalating. Yeah, our trap had collapsed yesterday after Farrah’s conversation with him, but that conversation also spurred him to get bold… and sloppy. That could be good, because sloppy made him easier to find and finding him made it possible to kill.
I was ready to end him.
He and his partner had left the Suburban in the parking lot. The police hadn’t noticed it. Ajani and Braeden had that thing broken down better than any crime scene investigation show I’d ever seen. Fingerprints and Prime’s connections revealed thatTrell’s accomplice was Maurice Dale. He usually worked withRamónBlack. No surprise there. The other set of fingerprints matched those of a man wanted for questioning in a couple of disappearances, but he had no record. A ghost, for real. That didn’t stop our searching for both of them.
I spent the day with Farrah around the house. Shorty knew I was still pissed off, so she was all sweet, trying to be in a nigga’s skin. I liked it all right, but I knew tomorrow that mouth would be back. Low-key, I was looking forward to it.
We were in the middle of a Spades game with Mekhayla and Seth when my phone rang. Shit was a relief because Farrah and Mekhayla were whooping our asses and bragging about.
