“Thank you, Lord,” I murmured. “I’ve never done this before, but traditionally Bonded pairs wake within a few hours of the ceremony. I would imagine that this might take longer, simply because of the nature of the Bond. Someone should be here when they wake up, though, to explain what’s happening.”
Lord d’Refan simply shot me an expectant look and I blew out a tired breath.
“I suppose that would be my job.”
“As you’re the only one who even knows of this new Bond . . . yes, I would say that must be you. I can have another bed made up for you across the hall?”
I shook my head. “No, that’s fine. I’ll sleep on the couch. There should be someone in here when they wake. I’m certain there will be . . . questions.”
Lord d’Refan shoved his hands in his pockets before nodding to me. “Very well. Make sure you record what happened here in your little notebook over there. I would expect you’ll be performing quite a few more of these in the coming weeks.”
I blanched at that but nodded my head again. “Yes, my lord.”
With that he grunted once more before turning and striding from the room, closing the door behind him. I was encased in silence once more, feeling more alone than I ever had. I gently pulled the hair back from Ben’s forehead, doing nothing to stop the tears that coursed down my cheeks.
I pressed a small kiss between his eyebrows before shuffling back to the couch and collapsing onto it. I tucked myself into a ball, back pressed against the cushions, and let the sobs come.
I cried for Asha and her sacrifice for someone she’d never met.
I cried for forcing Ben into a Bond.
I cried for Rohak and his desire to find a partner, but inability to do so.
But most of all, selfishly, I cried for me. I cried for willingly sacrificing something that made me happy, for the loss of what could have been, and for the future I’d inevitably be thrust into.
I sobbed until my tears ran dry and I was gasping for breath.
It was like that, a puddle of snot and tears under my face, knees pressed to my chest, that I fell asleep, my dreams plagued by the stress of the day and horrors of what was to come.
Chapter 57
Rohak
Istomped through the manor, slamming doors and glaring at any servant who dared to make eye contact with me. They quickly got the hint and scurried out of my way as I thundered through the halls.
Fucking Faylinn and those fucking Bonds.
She knew how I felt about Bonds—the sanctity of finding your True Bond, the reason I despised the Forced Bonds. She empathized with me, said she understood, and then turned around and forced a Bond on a man she professed to love not hours later.
What else does she do to those she “loves?”
I scoffed to myself as I stomped down the stairs toward Alois’ office.
Was I being a bit self-absorbed in this? Maybe.
Did I understand that she had relatively no choice? Deep down, yes.
I could even sympathize with her and, logically, her decision to Bond Ben made sense. But it was the glee on her face when she discovered the information, the pure wonder and excitement in her voice when she showed me the book and Bonding Rune, coupled with the blank mask she wore when completing the Bond, that sent me over the edge.
There was no remorse in her expression, just plain curiosity and an edge of excitement.
At her core, Faylinn was a scholar, and a bright one at that. But I thoughtshe was more than that—that the kindness, love, and caring she showed her people back in Isrun would translate over to the people and her studies here in Vespera.
I was more than disconcerted that I could be wrong about her.
And, if I was wrong, she would be a tool of destruction in Alois’ hands.
The whole thing made my gut churn.
