“Bonds are different for everyone,” I sighed. “The experience of Forced and True Bonds are even more different.”
“Will you tell me about them?’
“Are you asking me about my sex life, Rohak?” I smirked, trying to relax him further, and was pleased when a slight blush rose in his olive-toned cheeks.
He gripped the back of his neck hard before barking a second laugh. “Yeah. I guess I am.”
I openly laughed at his admission and recrossed my hands on my belly.
Recounting the memory of Bonding Sasori would be painful—like opening a festering wound. But maybe it’d be cathartic in a way, healing.
Besides, I’d do anything for the man in front of me, even flaying my soul open wide.
“Sit back and relax, Rohak. It’s a wild ride,” I said.
Chapter 65
Lex
SEVENTEEN YEARS AGO
My soft leather boots padded silently against the sparkling obsidian floors, a direct contrast to the sharperclackof the sandals that accompanied the gait of an acolyte of Fate. The halls were relatively empty, but that was to be expected for the middle of the day.
Most, if not all of the soldiers—both Awakened and unAwakened—were in some sort of training. Weapons, hand-to-hand, magical combat, strategy. Only soldiers with special dispensations, usually those with newer Bonds, were given ‘off time’ during the day. There were a multitude of things that Bonded Mages and Vessels needed to do, especially in the early days of the Bond, to grow and foster their connection.
But that was generally done in private.
So it was no surprise that the corridors were empty today.
It’d been nearly six months since I’d Awakened on the dreaded table deep down in the hidden catacombs of the Academy, and I’d subsisted on crystals since that fateful day.
I often wondered, when I was in class or training with another Awakened soldier, if they knew what was happening beneath their very feet. They couldn’t—I was sure of it. Theirawe and reverence when I appeared one day in the Awakened barracks sporting not one, but two affinities was enough to make me believe that they knew nothing of the horrors below.
And I chose to keep believing that.
Because the alternative was even worse than their innocence.
True to my prediction, no one else emerged from the dungeon below.
Each day since I came back, I looked for a familiar face, but predictably found none. I long ago gave up the notion that anyone else would emerge with two powers. Now, I just held a thin thread of hope that some of those soldiers would at least survive.
It was a fool’s hope.
No one left that dungeon alive.
Not even me.
After the initial intrigue of my powers wore off, both unAwakened and Awakened soldiers gave me a wide berth. I was somewhat of a social pariah now, especially with all the unwanted attention I received from Lord d’Refan.
I’d been given my own room—large and well-furnished, it was substantially larger than the entire apartment I’d shared with my mother and siblings—as well as certain special dispensations. Like the ability to visit a pleasure house whenever I desired.
I internally shuddered at even the thought.
My thoughts drifted back to the acolyte leading me through the winding hallways. Last night, Lord d’Refan sent word that a new group of Vessels was arriving at the Academy, a handful of Pleasure and Pain Vessels amongst them. As his new “pet,” I had the ability to choose my Vessel first, ahead of even some of the more seasoned Mages. This, of course, only caused the other soldiers—Mages especially—to detest me.
Lord d’Refan’s offering of a Vessel was remarkable. But I simply couldn’t bring myself to choose one, to bind myself to another person for the rest of eternity.
The last person I’d grown close to was irreparably damaged because of me, her memories completely erased. Her body broken and permanently scarred.
