I smiled. “Do you want to walk down to the beach?” It was low tide, and the beach was wide and inviting. I pointed out the path to her.
She followed the line of my finger, her expression shaken. Her hand still covered her heart, but she nodded. When we reached the beach, she opened her arms wide and turned around in a circle. “I can’t believe this is all yours.”
“Mine and Amir’s and Bear’s. But Bear never comes down here. He hates the cliffs. And the beach.”
“Why does he live here if he hates it?”
I’d never asked myself this question. “I don’t know.” Then I thought of the only time I’d seen Bear at the beach—walking out into the water with my father’s ashes—and I thought that maybe I did know why. This place was all we had left of our parents. It was hard to imagine Bear’s feelings, but that did not mean he didn’t have them.
“Can we sit for a moment?” Rosalie asked.
I led her to the area near the back of the beach where Amir and I had long ago arranged some large rocks into seats. Rosalie looked surprisingly comfortable on those rocks, even in her nice clothes. Maybe she really was an avid camper, as Emma had claimed. For a few minutes we sat in silence and took in the view. I hoped to impress Rosalie with a sighting of one of thegray whales that traveled from Alaska to Baja, but it was early in the season for that journey and I knew the chances were slim. The sun sparkled against the water, making it look like an unending expanse of glistening ice. No whales appeared.
“It’s gorgeous here,” Rosalie said, looking out at the sea. I wondered if she was going to tell me what had really spurred her visit. “It’s so... untamed. I can see why you and Amir love it.”
She removed her hat and pushed her sunglasses up into her blond hair. When she turned toward me I was surprised to see that her face, suddenly exposed, was etched with concern. Her blue eyes held mine.
“I know you love it here,” she said again. “But, Merrow, you’re sixteen. You’re allowed to have big plans for your life. And I think that you do. I think that sometimes you dream about a future that is very different from your past. That’s why you wanted to look in our windows, wasn’t it? And that’s why when you described Horseshoe Cliff to me—even though the words you used were beautiful—you sounded so sad.
“This is your home,” she continued. “You are a part of this place, and it will always be a part of you. But sometimes home is the place you have to leave in order to discover who you truly are.”
I realized that my hands had begun to tremble only when Rosalie covered them with her own.
“We don’t know each other well, but I meant what I said last weekend. I believe there are moments when your whole life changes, and I felt that sort of change when you stayed with us. I think I’m meant to help you. I think Icanhelp you. I hope you’ll allow me.”
“I don’t understand.”
“I think you should apply to college. Now. Today. What reason is there to wait? I don’t know the exact details of your life here, but I know enough to think that you would be better, maybe even safer, somewhere else.”
“I don’t know if he’ll let me.” My face burned.
Rosalie leveled her eyes on mine. “Bear.”
I nodded. If Bear thought leaving would make me happy, he would do everything in his power to make me stay.
“Then we’ll file emancipation papers. You have your GED. We can use that to establish your maturity.” Rosalie squeezed my hand. “I know how to do this, Merrow. I did it myself. And you don’t need to worry about the financial aspect. Between any number of scholarships and my own contributions, you’ll be okay.”
I understood then that shehadspent the week thinking about me, that her words were not empty promises. But I would not leave unless Amir left with me. Why should we wait out the two years before we became adults in a place where Bear would continue to hurt us when we could be together somewhere else? In two years, the land would be ours. We could return to Horseshoe Cliff as adults.
“I can’t leave without Amir.”
“Does he have his GED?”
“No. But I won’t go without him. You have to help him, too.”
Rosalie patted my hand and at the same time, without any hesitation at all, she said the words that would make me love her forever. “We will.”
AFTERROSALIE DROVEaway, promising to return soon, I checked the garden for Amir but could not find him. I figured he was working in the orchard. I wanted him to be in a good mood when I told him the news that Rosalie had agreed to help us leave Horseshoe Cliff, and since both of our moods were tied to our stomachs, I decided to make him a sandwich. The television blared from Bear’s room, and I felt so exhilarated that I almost considered knocking on his door and asking if he wanted me to make him a sandwich, too. Then I realized that my happiness would only make him suspicious. The less Bear knew about my plan, the better.
I’d put two boiled-egg-and-lettuce sandwiches on a plate and was adding the last of our fall carrot harvest when I heard a car in the driveway. I set the plate on the counter and walked outside.
Rei stepped from her car. “Where’ve you been?” I called down to her from the porch. We hadn’t seen her all week.
She blinked up at me and shook her head. It was her favored response when she thought I was being rude. The bracelets that lined her arms shook,tskingagainst each other. Amir had made her a wooden bangle engraved with stars for Christmas the previous year, and I hadn’t seen her without it since.
“Hello, Merrow. I’ve been on a baking tear. Help me bring some of this inside, please.”
I headed down the steps to help her. Though my limp was almost gone, she stopped and narrowed her eyes at me. “What happened?”
