My objections to the marriage were not merely those which I acknowledge to have required the utmost force of passion to put aside in my own case. There is, in the case of your mother, a want of connection that would hinder Bingley’s advancement in society. However, the situation of your mother’s family, though objectionable, was nothing in comparison of that total want of propriety so frequently, so almost uniformly betrayed by herself, by your three younger sisters, and occasionally even by your father—pardon me—it pains me to offend you. But amidst your concern for the defects of your nearest relations, and your displeasure at this representation of them, let it give you consolation to consider that to have conducted yourselves so as to avoid any share of the like censure is praise no less generally bestowed upon you.
I did not wish for Bingley to marry your sister—a young woman who may never have the capacity to love him back in the way that he deserved—and then be burdened with poor connections and grasping relations for the remainder of his life.
It took all of Elizabeth’s efforts to resist crumbling the letter and hurling it into the fireplace. After several calming breaths,she picked it up off the bed where she had dropped it and continued reading.
Returning to my family’s situation: it wasn’t until my father died five years ago that I was able to help my sister. When I arrived at Pemberley, I was horrified to discover that Nurse had fallen ill several days prior, and the maid-of-all-work who had been hired to come once a day had been being paid for a job she never actually did. My ten-year-old sister had been left alone to care for an elderly woman near death with no way to summon help, in spite of her father’s home being a stone’s throw away.
Elizabeth’s reading of the remainder of Darcy’s letter was interrupted by her frequent sobs. Through her tears, she could scarcely make out the story of Dr. Carson’s surgery on Georgiana, as well as Darcy’s complete ignorance as to Major Wickham’s situation once the steward had been ordered from Pemberley.
Shortly before Bingley invited me to Netherfield, I returned to Pemberley for the harvest. I had spent much of the summer in Town on business and was eager to see how my sister was doing. I arrived sooner than anticipated and looked forward to surprising her. You may imagine what I felt and how I acted when I quietly crept towards her schoolroom, only to hear her companion, a Mrs. Younge, berating her with the foulest of epithets.
“Oh, the poor, dear girl!”
I immediately removed my sister to London, where I could personally ensure that she was being treated in the manner befitting her station. Her affectionate heart has been greatly damaged by years of mistreatment by those who should have loved her best. I was loath to leave her for Hertfordshire—especially as London at large is unaware of her existence—but Bingley has ever been a steady friend, and my mother’sfamily—with whom I am gradually becoming acquainted, all ties having been severed upon my father’s erratic behavior—encouraged the short distance as a way for my sister and I to regain our confidence.
This, madam, is a faithful narrative of every event in which we have been concerned together, and if you do not absolutely reject it as false, you will, I hope, acquit me henceforth of cruelty towards both your sister and Major Wickham.
I shall endeavor to find some opportunity of putting this letter in your hands in the course of the day before I leave for London. I will only add, God bless you.
Chapter 23
By the time the cock crowed to announce the rising sun, Elizabeth’s letter from Darcy had been stained with tears and had begun to tear along the creases of the folds. Having remained awake all night to read and reread the missive time and again, Elizabeth was almost drunk from lack of sleep.
How differently did everything now appear in which Darcy was concerned! His questions about Polly appearing in public, his comments to Bingley about Jane being an appropriate match… it was all done with his sister in mind.
She grew absolutely ashamed of herself. “How despicably have I acted!” she cried aloud to the empty room. “I, who have prided myself on my discernment! I, who have valued myself for my abilities! How humiliating is this discovery—yet, how just a humiliation! Til this moment, I never knew myself.”
Elizabeth’s self-recriminations lasted for several days. The biggest contributing factor to the lengthy duration of her self-castigation was the fact that she had very little to occupy her time.
Louisa was actively employed in helping her husband recuperate from his injuries. While he was physically healing tolerably well, his mental state left much to be desired. He was determined to cease imbibing, and the resulting withdrawalswere affecting his emotional well-being more than was originally anticipated. As his injuries prevented him from distracting himself with riding, hunting, fishing, or other similar pursuits, it was up to Louisa to ensure that Mr. Hurst’s mind was kept agreeably engaged.
Jane and Bingley—or Charles, as Elizabeth was continually reminded to call him—were completely absorbed in their own world. Elizabeth felt quite redundant at Netherfield now that Jane had a husband to care for her. She never realized how much time was spent tending to Jane’s needs until it was no longer required of her.
After a week of reading the same books and walking the same paths, Elizabeth could no longer bear the solitude. It left too much time for rumination and self-reflection. While she was certain she deserved every moment of her self-castigation, she knew that if she wallowed in her remorse for too long, others would notice and question it.
It was with this in mind that Elizabeth set forth to Meryton, intent on distracting herself with news from friends and family. She was not formed for ill-humor, and the brisk walk in the unusually warm weather did much to soothe her wounded spirits.
As she reached the edge of the village, her steps felt lighter with anticipation of the day’s encounters. The town, always a hive of activity, seemed particularly lively, echoing with the mingled sounds of commerce and conversation.
The town square was abuzz with the chatter of townsfolk and the occasional clatter of carriage wheels over cobblestones. A group of children played a spirited game near the fountain, their laughter ringing clear and joyful, while their mothers exchanged news and gossip nearby, their voices a comfortable murmur in the background.
Elizabeth’s attention was then drawn to a small crowd gathered around a stall, where a traveling merchant was animatedly showcasing his wares. Curious, she edged closer, intrigued by the exotic spices and fabrics that promised tales of distant lands.
Just as Elizabeth was about to engage the merchant further, a familiar voice called out her name. She turned and spotted Kitty and Lydia standing with a group of soldiers, eagerly waving at her, beckoning her to join them.
“What a good joke!” Lydia laughed. “We were just telling Denny and Wickham here that we haven’t seen you in an age, and here you are!”
“Almost as if by magic,” Elizabeth replied, a twinkle in her eye, which faded quickly when she realized how close her sisters were standing to the soldiers.
Elizabeth’s brief frown caused Kitty to blush and untangle her arm from her escort, but Lydia pretended not to notice her sister’s disapproval. She tossed her head and pressed her form closer to Wickham’s arm, who in turn cleared his throat awkwardly.
The uncomfortable moment was interrupted when Mrs. Phillips threw open her parlor window from across the street. “Girls! Do come inside, and bring the officers with you!”
Elizabeth’s face flushed at her aunt’s poor manners, but fortunately the officers were too eager for a decent meal and good company to say anything disparaging. As a group, they all crossed the street and, after entering the house, went to the parlor.
Once inside, Elizabeth was somewhat surprised to see that Major Wickham had abandoned Lydia’s company in favor of her own. He took a seat near her and, after inquiring after her health, offered his congratulations on Jane’s marriage.
“Thank you. They are doing quite well, and it is clear they are extremely happy together.”
