“I miss it too,” Parker says, his warm voice filling the room.
I clear my throat. “At least we have McGregor’s journal now. Soon you’ll have your powers back and we can split.” Parker slips his hand into his pocket, our plans to separate hovering in the air between us like thick smoke. “What date is it?” I ask.
“October twenty-six. We were gone for less than twenty-four hours.” A shit-stirring grin creeps across his face. “You might finally be getting the hang of this.”
“Imagine how good I’d be if I wasn’t carrying your massive head with me.” I laugh again, and my entire body aches with the movement. “Where’s McGregor’s research?”
Parker gets to his feet and retrieves the journal from his bed. It lands in my lap with a soft thud. “Lucky it’s from our time and I can hold it, or it’d be on the ground outside.”
I clutch the book in my trembling hands, as precious to me as the air I breathe. Our last hope.
“We should take it to McGregor,” Parker says. “Now.”
“We need to sort out your wound first. Find a first-aid kit and—” My bare legs brush against crisp bedsheets, the cool morning air kissing my exposed arms. My head snaps up. “Did you take off my clothes?”
“No.” He presses his lips together, gaze dropping to the floor. “Ella was here.”
I slump back against my pillow.Of courseshe was. “Parker, when I traveled us to Neurovida, my memories split. Spending time with Ella will only make it worse. Youknowthis.”
“My memories didn’t change,” Parker says.
“Because you don’t have any powers. Only a time traveler’s memories can split, remember?” I exhale and lower my voice. “Parker, the more you interact with her, the worse it’s going to be when we go back. You need to leave her alone.Please.You’re putting her in danger,” I say, pointing at him. “Stop using every excuse to spend time with her.”
“Excuse?” Parker says, his mouth hanging open. “You really have no idea, do you?” He purses his lips and stares through the open doorway. “I didn’t know what to do last night. You were incoherent, covered in blood, and I couldn’t help you.” His voice breaks on the last few words,the memories of last night reflected in his pinched brows. “Without Ella, we wouldn’t have made it through that front door. You owe her a massive thank you.”
I pick at my nails. Of course Parker sees it that way. People will tell themselves anything to sleep at night. “Where’s my fucking vape?”
Parker tries to snatch my jeans from the floor with a silent wince, but his hands pass through the fabric. “Fuck, Rose,” he says. Closing my eyes, I exert more energy to allow him to interact with his surroundings, and my brain protests in piercing jabs. He tries again, pulls my vape from the back pocket of my jeans and slams it down on my nightstand. “You’re welcome,” he says bitterly as I bring it to my lips.
My shoulders drop at the first inhale. “Go take a shower. You stink.” Vapor curls from my mouth. “I’m going to look through McGregor’s journal before we give it to him.”
Parker stops in the doorway, his posture stiff. “Why?”
“In case there’s information about why Neurovida turned on us,” I say, opening the old book.
Parker shrugs. “Because of Matthews. McGregor had nothing to do with it, but suit yourself.”
“I will,” I state to his back as he saunters out of sight.
Exhaling, I scan the first page of McGregor’s journal, but his messy, looped handwriting is near impossible to read.
E2360—Sedative
E1007—Catalyst
E2409—Inhibitor
What does it mean? There are pages of mathematical formulas, diagrams of chemical structures, medications and drug reactions. I can’t say half of them aloud. I press the heels of my palms into my eyes. I’m not equipped for this.
“Can I ask you a question?” Parker asks, reappearing shirtless in the doorway.
“Fuck off, Jimmy. I’m reading.”
“You’re hilarious. Do you remember the name of the guy Ella dated before she was recruited?”
My jaw tightens. Why does it matter? Here I am, killing myself so he can have some sort of future, and all he wants is to focus on Ella. I close my eyes. “No,” I bite out.
“What about how long they were together?”
