I can’t even conjure fear about getting on one of those walkways; I’m just so angry. There’s a possibility that the adrenaline burn-off, over-exertion, and emotional fuckery are contributing to how savage I feel. I ache from head to toe. A headache pulses behind my eyes. The only way I can stop my hands from shaking is by pressing them together so hard they bleed white. Despite the comfortable ambient temperature of the station, I’m inexplicably cold. But underneath all of that is a roiling, seething heat that I can see but can’t reach. It wants out, and I’m not sure my body could handle it.
I could leave right now and get on a train without Tanisira, except I have no idea where the ship’s docked. I also don’t want to be the one responsible for getting my broken body back there. It was horrible being found on the med bay floor the last time I stupidly pushed myself too far—I’m not going to do that again. Sighing, I blink some life into my heavy eyes, nab my hat and yank it on. I can at least stay inconspicuous whilst I wait. The plaza isn’t as busy as the central hub, the visibility much better, but that works against me right now.
As I sink onto a padded bench, I catch sight of a familiar face. I inhale sharply and freeze in place. The woman from the hotel stands in the middle of the atrium, amongst all the transient passengers, and stares straight at me. Samiran.Has to be. The pure beauty of her strikes me again, followed by the observation that she looks exactly like Tanisira in this getup.
She tilts her head andsmiles. Then she’s gone. I’m halfway out of my seat when the familiar scent of pomegranate, lavender, and vanilla washes over me. A second later, a hand cups my shoulder. It dawns on me.
I whirl around. “Are you fucking kidding me?”
Tanisira rears back and snatches her hand before I can slap it away. There’s a brief moment where I recognise the fatigue etched into her, but I’m too mad to stop.
“You’re something else, you know that,Myth?” I spit.
She flinches. But then she grits her teeth and steps closer, glancing around even as she catches my waist in a grip both tender and unyielding. She draws me close and lowers her voice.
“We have to go. There’s a maglev due to arrive any minute for our docking port. We need to be on it. You can shout at me all you want once we’re back on the ship.”
I hesitate, leaning away to stare up into those lidded eyes. She looks sad. The usual defences in her expression have dropped. My fingers twitch with an urge to touch her; out of kindness, out of affection. My heart twists. I can’t stop thinking about the shitstorm that was today.
“Count on it,” I say, pulling away from her. I feel scraped to the bone by the things I’ve learned today, and though I want to hear her side, I fear nothing can be the same again.
We stare at each other.
Wordlessly, she turns for the nearest walkway. As much as I don’t like having my anger scheduled,I see the way Tanisira glances over her shoulder every few seconds. We’re not safe yet, so I tamp it all down, down, down.
She gets us to the correct platform just in time to catch the train back to theMidas.
I stare out the window the whole journey.
Flesh. Trafficker. Greed.
Wretched
“What...the fuck are you wearing? Is this some kind of roleplay?”
“Beau, not now.”
I storm past them and head for Tanisira’s cabin, aware that she’s following. After this conversation, I’ll need to be alone, and it’ll be easier to leave her cabin than it will be to kick her out of mine.
“Cap, I tried—”
“Don’t worry about it,” Tanisira’s quiet voice reaches me just as I turn a corner. I’m relieved that Beau won’t get in trouble for letting me go off alone. It should make me feel like an errant child except I didn’t make good choices today, so it’s not wrong.
Tanisira enters her cabin hot on my heels. I start pacing, hands on my hips, as I try to organise my thoughts into some semblance of order. I have questions—boy, do I have questions— and maybe they’reallimportant, but what the hell do I start with?
My gaze flicks to where she stands, hands in her pockets, watching me. Uncertainty is writ large across her face. It’s almost painful to look at. Her usual, aggravating confidence is nowhere to be found. I falter.
But that’s not the only side of her I’ve seen today.
“I trusted you,” I blurt.
That might just be devastation on Tanisira’s face.
“What are you—”
“Not me, I don’t mean with me. With my son, Tanisira. I trusted you to keep him safe. I trusted you to have his best interests at heart. I trusted that you were good. Except that you’re not, are you?” I shake my head. “You’re a liar. A really fucking adept one, it turns out.”
“I never lied to you,” she says, voice thick.
