She laid a gentle hand on his arm. “I do. I do trust you.”
And she did, more than she’d trusted any man in years and years. She trusted that he cared about her. That he wished her happiness. That he would tell her the truth. That he’d found her sexy and interesting in this brief span of time, here on the island.
She just didn’t trust that they had a future off the island.
His lips compressed, but he didn’t argue with her, and he didn’t shake off her touch. “The reason I’ve looked so uncomfortable is because I need to talk to you about something.”
“All right.” She slid her hand down until she was surrounding his with both of hers, a mute apology. But she was a grown woman, and she needed to use her words too. “I’m sorry, Lucas. I just…”
“You just what?” He didn’t sound impatient or angry anymore, simply tired.
Her guilt, her anxiety over what he might actually want to say, felt like a literal, physical weight on her aching, slumped shoulders. “I just got worried. I’m leaving so soon, and I don’t know what happens then.”
At that, he straightened, his thigh suddenly tense and taut beside hers. “Conveniently enough, that’s precisely what I want to talk about.”
She turned to him, mouth firmly shut this time, and waited to hear what he had to say.
“My contract expires at the end of the year, like I told you. For a long time, I wasn’t sure whether I’d renew it or not.”
Was he considering another type of work? Coaching? Commentary?
If so, he’d be busier and more distant than ever, but at least he’d be taking advantage of his talents. Stretching himself and discovering what he could do without a racket in his hands.
It would hurt, of course, to have him so far out of her reach. But imagining him buried on this island forever, hiding from his past, hurt much, much more.
He paused. In this light, the circles beneath his eyes were dark as bruises, and no wonder. In lieu of restless sleep, he and Tess had made love throughout most of the previous night. She’d credited that to her own desperation, her own need for him, but maybe she hadn’t been the only one worried, the only one unsure of the future.
Another deep breath, and then he continued. “I’ve decided I won’t extend the contract. Over the holidays, I’ll visit my family in Sweden for a couple of weeks. Then I’ll move to Marysburg.”
The words were a punch to her diaphragm, stealing her breath.
She could only gape at him, gasping, unable to parse his intentions or her own emotions.
“I would get my own place at first, but we could eventually move in together.” His palm was uncharacteristically damp against her own, his fingers squeezing a bit too tightly. “Either at your house or a new place we bought jointly.”
She licked her lips, the buzzing in her ears rendering his voice nearly inaudible.
Then he stopped talking, and all she could hear was static and her heart thudding and thudding again. In panic, in joy, in disbelief, in anger that he was going to make her say it.
He was really, really going to make her be the one to say all of it.
“Tess—” He ducked his head to catch her eye, the movement jerky. “Say something.”
Well, he’d asked, and she would.
“You don’t have family in Marysburg. You don’t have a job in Marysburg.” She formed each word carefully, stripping them of emotion. “It’s a medium-sized town comprised of a college, a living history museum, high-end outlet stores, and retirees. Maybe people play tennis there, but it’s certainly not a hub for the sport.”
He immediately countered, “The college has a tennis center, and a Challenger-level tournament is held there every year. When I was recovering from one of my surgeries, I actually played at that tournament.”
He’d put that much thought into his decision, at least.
But not enough. Not nearly enough.
“Is the tennis center looking to hire, either now or in the next few months?” Her school-administrator tone had made an appearance, fair but no-nonsense. Inexorable. “I know you have savings from your time as a pro, but would the salary they’d offer be enough for you?”
He leaned back a little, pale beneath his tan.
“I…” His throat bobbed. “I haven’t had time to check. But even if they weren’t hiring, didn’t you tell me I could do anything I wanted? Including non-tennis-related work?”
