“Then the only person at fault here is the man who abused your mother. Not her. Not you. Him.” Wren’s eyes were wet too, but clear as the ocean, without a single eddy of doubt. “And if you have trouble believing that, you might want to see someone about it. A counselor.”
He swallowed over a sore throat. “Not you?”
“I’m happy to listen, but I can’t be your therapist. We’re too close.” She bit her lower lip. “No wonder you were so upset at this season’s scripts. Ron and R.J. had Cupid abandon Psyche and their healthy relationship to return to his abusive family, and you—”
“Acted the whole thing out to the best of my ability, even though I knew it was wrong.” His cheeks were tight with salt, his eyes sore. “Even though I knew it would hurt vulnerable viewers who might be struggling to leave violent relationships. I should have walked away from that fucking show, Wren. Walked away and not looked back.”
Again, he couldn’t spot a single shadow of condemnation in that extraordinary gaze. “So tell me, then. Why didn’t you?”
Selfishness,his brain immediately reiterated.Cowardice.
But that wasn’t the full story, was it?
“If I’d walked away—” He pressed his lips together. “My lawyer said it would be a clear violation of my contract, and I’d owe Ron and R.J. a shitload of money. And I was afraid I’d ruin my reputation in the industry. Which is ironic, given what happened at the convention, but …”
She nodded. “You didn’t want to bankrupt yourself or break something you’d been building for two decades. That’s understandable, Alex.”
“No. That’s not it. Not entirely.” Within the cup of her hands, he shook his head. “I think I’d have paid that price, if I would have been the only one paying it. But without savings, without a paycheck, how could I support my mom? How could I keep funding my charity? How could I afford to pay Dina?”
“Honey …” She stroked his cheeks with her thumbs. “Honey, that’s not self-absorbed. Not in the slightest.”
“I don’t …” Bending uncomfortably low, he rested his forehead on her soft shoulder again, and she resumed stroking his hair, and oh, fuck, therelief. “I don’t understand how you can say that, when all those people watching—”
She didn’t let him finish.
“You were in a situation with no good options, and you chose one. That’s all.” Her warm, moist breath puffed into his ear, and he shivered. “You said you trusted me. Is that true?”
He nodded against her neck.
“If that’s true,” she told him, “if you truly trust me, then you’re morally and legally obligated to believe me when I say you’re a good man. You have no choice. I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules.”
He didn’t believe her, of course. But Lauren was generally right about everything, and he did trust her. Totally and without reservation. So … he didn’tnotbelieve her either.
“Come on.” She tugged his arm, and he followed her back onto the couch. “Let’s stretch out and rest for a minute. I think we could both use a nap.”
He eyed her consideringly. “Only if I get to be the little spoon.”
“Whatever,” she said with a sigh.
They sprawled sideways on the generous couch, and she obligingly squeezed herself behind him. Before dozing off, he blearily noted the absolute perfection of her soft belly against his back, her round arm circling his ribs, and her strong hand clasped in his.
And then, absolutely safe at last, he let go and slept.
24
ALEX WOKE HARD AND WANTING.
His mind had been wiped clean of grief and guilt, at least for the moment, and his rested body responded to Wren’s proximity the exact same way it had been doing for weeks now.
When he twisted his neck just right, he caught a glimpse of the bedside clock. The two of them had only taken an hour’s nap, and he had plans for their second night together. Plans involving that spacious whirlpool tub on the balcony.
Now to find out if Wren still wanted him, even after his umpteenth emotional upheaval of their limited acquaintance.
Only—shit. As gently as possible, he slipped out of her arms and went to find his wallet. Because if he didn’t have a condom there …
“Alex?” Her voice was sleepy. “What are you doing?”
Better to know her intentions now, he supposed. “Checking for condoms. In case that’s something we might need.”
