She sighed and let her eyelids slip shut. “I’m so glad to be alive.”
And not only because she was eager to learn whether rumors of vampiric stamina and dicking-related talent had their basis in fact. Although that didn’t hurt.
“I am too,” he murmured, then kissed the crown of her head. “Strange, that.”
13
Max’s voice bristled with outrage. “You’re not a subscriber?”
“No.” With a tap of her finger, Edie selected the next download to watch. “The onlyBetter Than Youvideos I’ve seen in their entirety are the ones Brad and Tonya referenced on their channel. Which is probably why I didn’t immediately connect Mr. Macramé Undies with Chad, even after spotting you in that sheepskin thong two nights ago.”
“So you’ve watchedseveralof my videos and actually downloaded snippets of my contentonto your phone, but you’ve still chosen not to subscribe?”
Fashion and beauty weren’t really her thing, so…“I think I clicked the thumbs-up button for one of them?”
That hand-knotted underwear might not have tempted her to subscribe, but she’d wanted to salute his wedgie-inducing efforts—not to mention his ass—in some fashion. He’d earned her thumbs-up, even before she’d known about the Testicular Strangulation Incident.
Her attempt at consolation only offended him further. “Onlyone?”
“Poor Gaston.” She patted his forearm, tensed from holding the phone in front of them. “Never fear. You remain a bethonged inspiration to the rest of the villagers.”
“Hmph.”
The aggrievement in the sound was exaggerated, and they both knew why. Didn’t matter. It worked. She buried her snicker in his upper arm, finally relaxing into the couch’s cushions and his embrace once more.
Over an hour before her alarm had been due to sound that morning, she’d woken in the painful grips of another nightmare and the cool, careful hold of Max. To calm herself and provide her brain with pleasanter images, she’d grabbed her phone and tapped her downloads folder. At some point, he’d woken up too, and they’d begun to watch together.
In the current snippet, he was somehow transforming mime makeup into cutting-edge beauty, then admiring his reflection.
Which reminded her: “You can see yourself in a mirror, then?”
“Evidently.” His sarcasm was thick enough to choke her, and okay. Yes, that was a stupid question, but really, wasnoneof the accepted information about vampires correct?
“Then how did that even become a thing?”
“What impressive wordsmiths you humans are,” he murmured, then yelped when she kicked his shin with the heel of her bare foot. “Before the Battle for Containment, mirrors made discreet feeding more difficult, so we either avoided them or ensured we moved too quickly to be spotted in their reflections. The fewer witnesses, the better.”
Which was a very diplomatic way of saying,The fewer murders, the better.
Instead of pursuing that disturbing conversational tangent any further, she gestured to the phone and asked, “Why do this? If you simply want to be left alone, as you keep telling me, why make videos of yourself for worldwide public consumption?”
She had her theories, but she was curious how he’d justify his contradictory behavior. What he told himself in lieu of admitting to loneliness and a need for connection to others, however limited and one-sided. What he’d say to avoid acknowledging both a genuine interest in fashion and a healthy dose of justifiable vanity.
“Unlike many of my brethren, I refuse to exist as a sentient anachronism.” To his credit, he answered her question without hesitation. “I won’t hold on to a past that can’t be recaptured, and I’ll deal with the world as it is, not as it was. Which means employing modern technology and means of communication.”
Ah, there it was again. The inimitable scent of bullshit wafting through the chilly mall air. “You can do all that without modeling furry thongs on YouTube, dude. Try again.”
He paused this time, but only briefly. “When I inspire humans to put on the clothing and makeup I’ve modeled for them, they look like the fools they are. It’s very satisfying.”
That answer had the ring of partial truth. And since he wasn’t pushing her to share emotions she’d rather keep hidden, she’d grant him the same favor.
“Hmmm.” With a sigh, she reached out to swipe her cell’s screen and close the downloads folder. “Dawn isn’t too long from now. We should eat before we go. Did any of your blood packsmake it? Or did they all fall into the moat?” A thought occurred to her. “Or maybe vampires don’t need to eat every day?”
“We don’t.” He devoted unusual attention to placing her phone atop her bag. “In theory.”
Uh-oh. “What about reality?”
“If I went too long between meals, I’d eventually lack the strength to protect us both.” His chest swelled against her back with his deep inhalation. “And at some point, basic biology would take over.”
