“I suppose I deserved that,” Kip wheezed when he got back to his knees. “But you’re still an enormous dick, bro. And I don’t mean the size of your penis, so please don’t start talking about that again, Edie-my-love.Please.”
“Thank you,” Max said placidly, tugging her closer to his side. Together, they watched Kip crawl off in search of more food. “I try.”
23
At some point, everyone else drifted to other parts of the house, and Edie and Max finally had enough privacy to talk.
Well, semiprivacy. In the loft above, the trolls were ranking their evening’s refreshments as they noisily crunched on yet another snack. But it was the most solitude Edie and her favorite vampire had managed all evening, and the most they might have until after the battle. And even this limited isolation wouldn’t last long. Some of the Girl Explorers would need to make a bed on the living room floor, sooner rather than later.
She had so many things to say and no time to waste.
“Shit, Max,” she whispered, as soon as they were alone. “I’m so sorry.”
His voice was quiet too, and very, very warm. “Why? You’ve done nothing wrong, my Edie.”
Gods and goddesses above, where to begin? She could apologize for the remainder of the night, and it wouldn’t be enough.
Kissing her fingertips, she pressed them over his heart and took a deep breath.
“I’m sorry you were forced to reveal your secrets so publicly when you’d have preferred to keep silent. I’m sorry you had to relive such an awful moment in your life. I’m sorry you were betrayed and terribly hurt on every possible level by your ally and your lover.” Her breath hitched. “And I’m sorry my decisions brought you here, to a place where you don’t trust anyone. I’m sorry you’re about to risk your life to protect me—to protect all of us—instead of hunkering down safely and comfortably in your basement.”
One broad hand rose to cover hers on his chest while the other cradled her nape.
“You know,” he said thoughtfully, “I think I preferlairtobasement. It sounds classier. More archvillain, lessguy who lives with his mom and works part-time at Foot Locker.”
She huffed out a laugh. “Less Chad, you mean.”
“Precisely.” His fingertip smoothed a strand of hair behind her ear. “Darling, I don’t think you understand what was happening to me down in my lair. Without your intervention, I might have been safe in the moment, but not for much longer.”
Did he think the zombies could potentially reach him down there? Despite the ladder and the freaking water pit? “You’re right. I don’t understand.”
“I was detaching.” The words were stark, his eyes certain. “Some days, even drinking a blood pack felt like too much effort.”
Was he telling her he’d eventually have starved himself? Compared to the alternative form of detachment he’d mentioned—a blood-drenched killing spree—it was certainly the preferable option, but…there would have been no more Gaston/Max/Chad in the world? Anywhere?
The thought of it squeezed her heart like a vicious fist.
His forehead came to rest against hers, underlining the intimacy of his confession. “The only living being who truly interested me anymore was my human neighbor. The only duty I still cared about was keeping her safe, even as I kept her at a distance. The only bright moments in my endless days were my encounters with her, when she’d ring my doorbell and patiently suffer through another conversation with fuckingChad.”
“But…” That couldn’t be true. “What about your videos?”
“They helped, but not enough to keep me tethered to my life.” He lifted his hand from hers, and his fingers tunneled through her hair, working out the tangles in slow, gentle tugs. “I’m grateful to care deeply about anything at all, sweet Edie. And I’m beyond lucky to care deeply aboutyou.”
Her sinuses had begun to prickle. “I don’t…”
I don’t think anyone’s valued me this much in over two decades. I don’t know what I’ll do if you die tomorrow. I don’t care what anyone else believes about you, or about us as a couple, as long as I know the truth of who and what you are.
“You’re worth every risk I’m taking. You deserve everything I have to offer.” The tip of his nose glided along the side of hers, the tenderness in the gesture matching the open adoration in his words. “I don’t want your apologies, ma puce. I want to thank you.”
A declaration that nakedly heartfelt from such an embittered and suspicious vampire would have melted the knees of even the most hardened soul. Edie was many things, but not hard.
She sniffled. Loudly. Then ducked her head for a moment.
“Did you…” He paused. “Did you just wipe your nose on my hoodie? Again?”
Yes. Because her system simply couldn’t handle more sincere emotion right now, and if he kept being so sweet, she’d be tempted to jump him despite the presence of nearby trolls. Who would most likely peer over the loft railing and watch, snacking happily all the while.
She wasn’t shy. Dabbling in a little exhibitionism might be worth it.
