Mockrealization filled her eyes. “Oh, that. What’s there to tell? It was nothing.”
“I beg to differ. We need to talk about it.”
She sighed, dropping her hands. “There’s nothing to talk about, Marino—”
“Stop. Stop calling me that.” My annoyance and irritation flared as I cut her off.
“It’s your name.”
“That’s not what you call me.”
She shrugged. “Well, get used to it, Marino.”
I frowned. Not many things threw me off guard, but her attitude right then was answering all the questions that had been taunting my mind.
“What happened?”I asked in Spanish carefully; you might have even thought there was a genuine softness to my voice—maybe there was.
Zahra’s eyes widened, showing that she hadn’t expected me to ask. But she collected herself quickly, and I saw how she locked her shoulders, raising her guard.
“Whatever happened is none of your business,” she responded in English. “Like I said,” she continued, “there is nothing to talk about, and honestly, I’m in a very terrible mood right now, and I can’t dissect whatever happened on that rooftop or why the fuck you would want to talk about it, but get this, we were high out of our minds, okay? It was a fucked-up night, filled with raging hormones, and we shared a stupid fucking kiss and tried to get each other off until we were interrupted; thank God for that.”
It was silent for what seemed like a long minute. I had nothing to say. No—my mouth felt too dry, and I had the strongest urge to drink water.
She shifted on her feet. “So, if you’d excuse me, I’d like to go back to that house and pretend like the people I call family don’t exist until I have to work with them again.”
I tried to find thoughts, but they were very silent at the moment, so I just swallowed, nodded, looked away from her, and motioned to the door as I said, “Of course.”
She hesitated to leave for a bit, and when I looked back at her, I caught what seemed like regret in her eyes.
She sighed. “Listen, Elio—”
“You’ve cleared up my concerns. You can leave now.”
She let out a shaky breath before nodding. “Okay…” Her eyes searched mine for a few seconds, and then she turned on her heel and left the space, closing the door behind her and subjecting me to silence.
I stood staring at the closed door.
For how long, I had no idea.
But finally, after so long, I had one thought.
No—one affirmation.
I had wasted valuable time asking questions I should have seen the answers to up front, and I should probably have punished myself for how useless the last ten hours had been and for losing control like that on the rooftop.
But I knew I would also be wasting my time punishing myself, so I’d learn the lesson from this experience instead.
It was a“stupid fucking kiss.”Therefore, it was something I’d never repeat.
Probably for as long as I breathed.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Zahra
Through my headphones, I could hear the soft knocking on my door, which I’d been ignoring for almost five minutes now. I pressed my eyelids together, a flimsy attempt to block out my thoughts and center my mind.
I wasn’t in a good place. I was too in my head. A lot of thoughts plagued my mind. I didn’t know which to focus on. Devil and Upper being involved in some way. Milk knowing about it, Dog suspecting and not saying anything to me. The incident on the rooftop with Elio, which hadn’t stopped replaying in my head… the warmth of his lips that had me pressing mine together every time to remember how it felt subconsciously.
