Chapter 2
Clarissa stared into Christian’s deep-set eyes, unable to utter one sensible word. His smile slid into an amused grin, and she realized her mouth was open—wide enough to catch flies, if the look on his face was any indication.
Clamping her jaw shut, she inwardly cursed the flood of heat rushing to her cheeks. Blushing over Christian? What in the world had come over her?
“There’s no need to pink up on my account, Ladybird,” Christian said. “But I’ll be happy to take the reaction as a compliment.”
His words came out in a masculine rumble, warmed by a hint of laughter. In response, something fizzy shot down her spine. Surprise turned to alarm as she realized her body had turned traitor, responding to Christian on a purely physical level. Not since Jeremy marched off to war had she felt anything remotely similar. She had thought never to feel it again, nor had she any desire to.
Or so she had thought.
Fortunately, before she could do something truly stupid—such as continue to gape at Christian like a bird-wit—Lillian whacked her brother on the arm with her closed fan.
“Why in heaven’s name would you refer to Clarissa bythat silly nickname? You know she has always hated it. You really are the most dreadful, annoying boy, Christian.”
He laughed—a rich, entrancing sound. As if by magic, the tumult of the ballroom faded away, and Clarissa found herself transported back to a time when the world was bright and peaceful. To a time when she and Lillian had romped through the woods on the Archer estate with a pack of frolicking spaniels on their heels, and a rambunctious, teasing boy always at hand to make them laugh.
“She hates it?” Christian asked. “She never said anything to me. But if that’s the case, certainly I’ll call her Clarissa from now on.”
“Now you’re being disrespectful,” Lillian scolded, sounding like her mother. “Her proper name is Mrs. Middleton, as well you know. Did you lose all your manners in the Peninsula?”
Christian’s vibrant eyes turned serious, although a shadow of a smile still lingered on his lips. He executed a faultless bow, looking every inch the dashing officer in his regimentals. “Mrs. Middleton, please forgive my shabby ways. I have been too long away from the civilizing influence of the ladies. You may blame my bad manners on the fact that I spend most of my time in the company of soldiers—an uncouth lot at the best of times.”
Clarissa forced herself to rally. Itwasonly Christian. What did it matter that he had turned into perhaps the most handsome man she had ever seen? Besides, it was foolish for a widow to act in so ninny-headed a fashion over a younger man.
“There’s no need to apologize, Captain Archer,” she replied, trying to strike a note of friendly disinterest. “We’re the oldest of friends, are we not? I was simply surprised at how …”
She trailed off, running a quick glance over his tall, impressive physique. How to explain her reaction withoutsounding like a flustered schoolgirl? Her cheeks began to heat again as she struggled to find the correct response.
Although the devil was back in his eyes, he took pity on her.
“I imagine you’re surprised at how I’ve grown,” he said. “I believe I was little more than a callow youth the last time you saw me.”
Lillian rolled her eyes. “A beanpole, more like it. I never knew a boy as tall and skinny as you were before you joined the army. Father used to say you should have picked the navy, instead. They could have used you as a mast on a frigate.”
Clarissa smiled with relief as brother and sister bantered back and forth, finally understanding her strange reaction. The last time she had seen Christian he’d been a gangly boy, his body giving no hint yet that he would grow into such a powerful man. In his dress uniform, he was a handsome, intimidating giant.
“You certainly are quite large,” she interjected into a pause in the conversation. “I’m sure I ’d have to stand on a chair if I wanted to box your ears again. It was so much easier when you were a little boy.”
Christian’s ready laughter sent a ripple of pleasure humming through her body. Clarissa couldn’t help laughing, too, but more from surprise that she was actually enjoying herself than from the humor of her silly joke. A few nosy guests turned and leveled their quizzing glasses at her, but for once she didn’t care. It had been a long time since she had felt this at ease.
Christian’s eyes gleamed. “If you ever think I need my ears boxed, Mrs. Middleton, I’ll be happy to escort you to a chair and hand you up. I should be most happy to receive a correction from you.”
“Really, Christian, the things you say,” huffed Lillian.
But for all her scolding, Clarissa’s friend was a completefraud. Lillian gazed at her brother, pride and love shining in her eyes. Clearly, no regrets for Christian’s chosen profession diminished her enjoyment of his company. No fears for his future frayed the edges of her happiness. Lillian and the entire Archer family had sent Christian off to war with their blessings, never doubting that he would cover himself in honor and glory. They seemed happy to make the sacrifice, even as the war dragged on year after year, the casualties mounting ever higher.
One of those casualties had been Jeremy.
At the unbidden thought, Clarissa pressed a hand to her stomach, willing the sick feeling that suddenly tightened her insides to subside. Unlike the Archers, she had begged her husband not to join the army. What were king and country to her if the war meant she might lose the man she loved? But Jeremy had gently but firmly overruled all her objections, telling her that every man must do his duty. She had almost hated him then, as she had in the months that followed his death.
Taking a deep breath, she cast her gaze around, trying to distract herself. But everywhere she looked, she saw only red coats and gold epaulettes. The room overflowed with officers—except for one. The only one who mattered to her, and who was lost forever.
A gentle hand touched her shoulder. She jerked her head up to meet Christian’s gaze. His too perceptive eyes inspected her.
“Mrs. Middleton, are you well? It’s very hot in here. Perhaps you should sit down.”
“Goodness, no,” she replied with a forced laugh. “I’m perfectly well, thank you.”
