Lambert shrugs, like he doesn’t care that all of us are caught between incredulity and disgust. “Don’t knock it unless you’ve tried it.”
I’m not usually one to judge, but isn’t using women as good luck charms a little disrespectful?
“Besides,” he continues. “I don’t need it this year. Kyrith’s going to?—”
“She won’t hug you,” Leo warns. “And if you ask her to blow you, I’m pretty sure she’ll banish you again.”
The room goes silent, and I know we’re all wondering the same thing: what would that even feel like? She’s a ghost, right? Even if we felt something, would she? It wouldn’t be fair if I couldn’t reciprocate…
Hypothetically, of course.
I definitely have not thought about her ordering me to my knees, pressing her dainty toes into my chest, and letting me shove those long skirts out of the way…
Getting horny for a ghost would be so wrong.
Shit. I don’t even care. I’ve not had sex—that I can remember, anyway—in ten long-ass years. What encounters I had before that were…bad. The fumblings of teenagers who lacked the confidence to ask for what they wanted or communicate properly. Telling your girlfriend you want her to boss you around when you’re nineteen is somehow more embarrassing than confessing that you’re still a virgin. Besides, after such a long period of enforced celibacy, I’d be more worried if I wasn’t wondering about the tits that are alwaysalmostspilling out of that corset.
Dakari rolls himself out from underneath the projector with a satisfied huff. “It’s done. Where’s your Ackland shadow? He needs to wear the pendant if we’re going to watch anything.”
“North?” Lambert looks around, as if only just noting that his friend is missing. “He said he was on his way.”
“I’m here.” North sticks his head around the corner. “But there was no way I was pissing around with cushions and shit.”
His yellow eyes light on me for a second, and the calculating gleam in them makes me look away, nervously.
“You’ve been here the whole time?” Lambert interrupts, aghast. “We could’ve used you?—”
North rolls his eyes, oblivious to the ghost who’s just materialised behind him.
“Whatever. It doesn’t look like her majesty is showing up, anyway.”
Grimacing on his behalf, I wait for him to notice, or for her to announce herself. Neither happens. Something in our expressions or silence must eventually give her away, because he whirls to discover Kyrith with her arms folded and an unimpressed expression levelled in his direction.
It would be funny if it wasn’t so cringeworthy.
A heartbeat passes, where we wait for him to apologise, or for her to give him a strike. He says nothing, and her brow rises as he turns his back on her as if she doesn’t exist and holds his hand out to Dakari.
“Chuck me the damned necklace, and let’s get this over with.”
“Kyrith, can I get a kiss for luck?” Lambert asks, bounding past his friend towards the Librarian who actually drifts through a wall to avoid him on her way into the room.
“Don’t be ridiculous.” She scoffs, though she loses some of the stiffness in her posture. “What would kissing me achieve? Play well and make your own luck.”
Lambert doesn’t visibly react, except for the slightest twitch of his lips. “One day, boss lady!”
I’m pretty sure Kyrith mutters, “if I were alive…” under her breath as she passes me.
North grabs Lambert—presumably to try to stop him from doing anything more embarrassing—but he’s too late to stop the blond idiot from asking:
“What about a victory lap dance?”
He can’t see it from where he’s standing, but the corner of her lip actually quirks upward for a heartbeat before she manages to control her expression.
She turns to regard him in silence for a long second, and we all get to watch as he slowly starts to lose a sliver of his confidence.
“I mean… I could just… I’ll… Ahem…”
I stifle my chuckle behind my hand.
