Cale is one of the nicest guys I’ve ever met.He’s deadly on the ice but has a heart the size of Texas.That heart shines through his friendships, and I know it’s what makes him a hell of a great team captain.
It’s that compassion that I can only assume led to his marriage.
“Fuck, dude,” I acknowledge softly.“Is that the reason you married her?To help her out?”
He shakes his head and turns his gaze toward the gym wall, contemplating something only he can see.
“I know it’s difficult to understand, and I appreciate you worrying about me.But yeah, I couldn’t just walk away.She’s an American, has no family and she’s self-employed with crappy, really expensive insurance.I have millions,” he says self-deprecatingly, stretching his arms out wide.“I figured it was the least I could do for someone in need.”
“I don’t know, bruh.That’s really kind of you, but did you consider the possibility that she’s bullshitting you?She could just be feeding you a line about her health.”I click my teeth to show my disapproval.
He shakes his head, rubbing his jawline.
“Nah.She had me sit in on a video call with her doctors, so I know her diagnosis and the treatment are legit.Maybe I’m just a bleeding heart, I don’t know.”Costa shrugs his shoulders and twists to lie back down across the bench.Turning his head to the side, he lifts his gaze back to mine.“I guess the way I look at it is, if you have the means to help someone else, you gotta do the decent thing.Otherwise, you’re just a selfish asshole.”
It makes me wonder: If I were put in the same position, would I have the same level of empathy toward a stranger and offer my help?
Or would I be the selfish asshole in that equation?
15
Halle
After I finish up the spreadsheet I created with all the new data entered from the most recent game, I check my watch for the fiftieth time in the last six minutes.
12:15 p.m.
Why is it that time ticks by so slowly when you’re waiting for something to happen?It’s that way when you’re counting down the days until your birthday or for Christmas Eve to arrive.Or in this case, for the conversation with your ex about the paternity of your daughter.
Taking a long inhale, I let it go with intention and drop my head back against the chair.Then I begin to touch each finger to my thumbs on each hand, one by one, as a means of calming my nerves.
For five long years I’ve carried the weight of this secret, one only shared with my dad and Carmen.Not even my brothers know who Lennon’s father is, and honestly, they never even bothered to ask.As teenagers, they were too centered on their own lives and playing hockey to wonder about it.That didn’t prevent them from being great uncles, though, and they both love Lennon with all their hearts.
My dad, Zack, and Drew all stepped up to be the men she needed in her life.It was an easy topic for me to avoid because she had them to love and dote on her.Until the day came when Lenni expressed an interest in knowing who her daddy was.
It first occurred six months ago when she attended the birthday party of one of her preschool friends.It was held at the little girl’s house, and both parents were in attendance and very involved in the event.Lenni came home enamored with the way her friend’s dad had entertained them all, even putting on a cute dance performance with his little girl.
When I put Lenni to bed that night, she looked up at me with those soft pewter-gray eyes of hers and asked in her sweet voice, “Mama, will my daddy come to my birthday party, too?”
It shattered my heart into a million irreparable pieces.The response I came up with was not the full truth, and I knew it would only delay the inevitable.
“You don’t need one, sweet pea.In fact,” I said, brushing her baby soft hair from her face and tucking it behind her ear.“You’ve got more than just a daddy.You have your Papa and your uncles.You’re one lucky girl.”
She seemed satisfied with the answer at the time, but I know the question will continue to crop up in the future, possibly leading her to search on her own one day.
Which is why this conversation with Dane is long overdue, regardless of my reluctance to have it.
I’m startled back to the present when my coworker, Anna, who typically works remotely, pops into my cubicle from around the corner.
“Hey, Halle.You’ve got plans for lunch today?”
She beams at me with hopeful brown eyes.I don’t know too much about her yet, since she’s been on vacation since I started, but I know we’re about the same age and she’s engaged to her partner, Mo, short for Molly.
I return Anna’s smile with a mopey sad face.“Thank you so much for the offer, Anna.But I have lunch plans to meet up with… an old friend.”
This isn’t the first time I’ve been asked out to lunch or a happy hour by my new coworkers.Last week, I went out for a coffee break with Sanita, and was able to grab a drink with a few of our team members one evening while my dad was here.But sadly, going forward, I’m afraid I’ll be turning down more invites than I accept.My motherly duties require that I pick up Lenni from her daycare by 6:00 p.m.every night.
My boss, Trevor, has even graciously offered up the babysitting services of his nineteen-year-old daughter, Kelsie, who is earning money to go to New York next summer with a group of students from her school.I told him I’d consider it if needed.
