Geoff groaned, running a hand through the fur on his head. The gesture was endearing, somehow both human and distinctly not. “Fine. Remember that tournament last year? The one where I supposedly had internet issues during the finals?”
“Yeah, you dropped right in the middle of,” I stopped, realization dawning. “You didn’t have internet issues.”
“I panicked. Complete stage fright. Thousands of people were watching the livestream, and I froze. Closed the game and hid under my desk for twenty minutes.”
I stared at him. “You? Mister ‘Ice Cold Under Pressure’? You hid under your desk?”
“It seemed like a good idea at the time!”
I was laughing so hard I had to set my wineglass down before I spilled it. “Oh no. It’s all making sense. The forums were full of conspiracy theories. People thought you’d been DDoS’d.”
“I know. I felt terrible, but I couldn’t admit I had a panic attack.” He took a sip of his wine, ears twitching with embarrassment. “Your turn. Most embarrassing moment.”
I didn’t even have to think about what I was going to say. “I told you I loved you once.”
The words hung in the air between us. Geoff went still.
“I mean, not you specifically,” I said, my words coming out in a rush, heat flooding my face. “Or, well, yes, you specifically, but not. I mean, it was during that raid. The one where you saved me from the boss mechanic at the last second and I said, ‘oh my god I love you’ over voice chat.”
“I remember.” His voice remained neutral.
“Yeah, well. I played it off as a joke, but I was dying inside because I’d been having feelings for you for months at that point,and it just slipped out.” I was talking too fast now, nervous energy spilling over. “Tank messaged me after and asked if I was serious, and I panicked and said no, obviously not, we’re just friends, ha ha, but…”
“Maya.”
I looked at him. He’d moved closer somehow, or maybe I had, because there were only inches between us now.
“I knew,” he said softly. “Or at least I hoped.”
My breath hitched. “What?”
“I knew, or hoped, you weren’t entirely joking. I could hear it in your voice. Maybe it was the way you said it, or the pause after. And I wanted so badly to say it back, but I was terrified of making things weird between us.”
My heart pounded. “When was this?”
“A year and a half ago. The dragon raid.”
“You’ve known for a year and a half?”
“I’ve had feelings for longer than that.” He set his wineglass down, giving me his full attention. “Maya, I started falling for you about six months after we met. Maybe sooner. It crept up on me. I’d look forward to you logging on, how my day felt incomplete if we didn’t talk, and the way your laugh made everything better.”
I couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Same reason you didn’t. Fear.” His hand moved to rest on the blanket between us, close enough that I could feel his warmth. “What we had was precious. I didn’t want to risk it. And there were so many reasons it wouldn’t work, starting with the distance, the fact that you didn’t know what I was, the possibility that you’d never feel the same way.”
“But I did. I do.” The words tumbled out, wine-loosened and honest. “Feel the same way, I mean. I’ve been half in love with you for over a year, and the only thing stopping me from beingcompletely in love with you was the fear that you’d never feel the same way about me.”
“Maya.” Geoff’s eyes sparkled.
“And I know this is fast, and we just met in person yesterday, and there’s so much we need to figure out, but.” I broke off, emotions overwhelming me. “God, I've wanted to tell you for so long.”
Geoff’s hand covered mine, engulfing it completely. “Tell me now.”
“Tell you what?”
“Everything. All of it. No more hiding.”
I looked at our intertwined hands. His massive and fur-covered, mine small and pale against his, and felt the dam inside my chest break wide open. “Okay. Okay, yes. I can do this.” I took a shaky breath. “I love how you remember little things I mention in passing. How you send me memes online and text when you know I’m having a bad day. How you’re patient with new players even when they mess up mechanics we’ve explained ten times. I love your terrible puns and the way you laugh at my jokes even when they’re not that funny. I love that you live up here in the mountains doing your own thing and don’t apologize for it.”
