“You will, one day. But let’s stay on the topic at hand, please. I need some serious help.”
“Girl, bye. This is Brixton we’re talking about. Brixton is a saint in my eyes. He’s like the nicest man in Christenbury Hills, and you got him. He can’t be all that bad.”
“I don’thavehim. We’re separated.”
“Physically, yes, but guess what?” she asks as she stands. Walking over to me, she touches my chest and says, “But in here, are you separated?”
“Girl, if you don’t get your hand off of me…”
She laughs her way back to her barstool, sits down, and says, “Look–Brix is a nice guy. He wants to please everybody. I told you that before y’all got married, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing. It just needs to be checked.”
“I agree. That’s part of his problem.”
“What’s the other?”
“He’s so worried about what people think of him that he can’t live his life.”
“Mmm, hmm. That, too. What’s funny though is, if he’s into people-pleasing so much like you say, what happened to satisfying your needs and making sure he made himself available to spend time with you and all that?”
“That’s a question only he can answer.”
I bag up the carrots, put them in the fridge, and then wash the wooden cutting board.
Evie asks, “So, have you given it any thought?”
“I have.” I rinse off the cutting board and dry it with a towel. “I’ve been thinking about it all week. I think I’ma call him back tomorrow with my decision.”
“And what might that decision be?”
I hang up the towel and say, “I don’t want to do it, but I feel like if it’s going to keep a smile on his parents’ faces, then I suppose I need to. I don’t want to hurt them. They put a lot of pressure on Brixton to be this flawless person who didn’t make mistakes. It’s too much for anybody, honestly. I don’t know how he was able to live under so much expectation and scrutiny when he was growing up.”
“Girl, me either. I would’ve been done lost my mind.”
“Girl, you and me both!”
“But he’s grown now,” she says. “Mommy and Daddy shouldn’t have much influence over what he does.”
“He knows that. I just want to see him put his foot down for once and stop being so doggone nice. I want to see the alpha come out of him.”
She chuckles. “I hope I’m around for it!”
“Really, Evie.”
“Yeah!” She laughs some more and then asks, “Do you miss him, though? Be honest.”
I lean against the counter and cross my arms, thinking about her question for a moment. I want to be as honest as possible.
I say, “I miss being married. Miss having someone to share my life with. But, real talk, I missed him long before I left him.”
“Dang,” she says and shakes her head. “So, there’s no chance of y’all getting back together?”
“Ummm…” I drawl. “Unfortunately, I think that train has left the station, girl. That’s one of the reasons I don’t want to do this.Do you know how difficult it would be to pretend I have these intimate feelings for him? I’m not good at pretending or hiding the way I really feel about someone or something.”
“But surely you can do it for four days.”
I release an anxious breath and say, “I’ll definitely have to sleep on it.”
“Ain’t nothing wrong with that,” she advises. “You should sleep on it.And, look at it this way. If you do this for him, he owes you a favor too, right?”
