“Alright, out with it.”
She froze, her wide eyes darting to his. “Out with what?”
“What have you been wanting to say to me all night?”
“Nothing.”
“That’s not true.”
A flush crawled up her neck, visible in the candlelight, but she turned to face him, squaring her shoulders. “I have been giving this a lot of thought.”
His brows furrowed. “Of course.”
Her berry lips parted before she pulled her lower lip between her teeth. A shock of lust flew to Ben’s gut, and he battled the moan building in his chest. “This morning, you were telling me something when Abby interrupted us. I thought you were going to tell me you wanted nothing to do with me—”
“I wasn’t.” He wantedeverythingwith her, as foolish as it was to believe it was a possibility to have her. He stood deliberately, and Rose’s eyes followed him, locked in as he stepped towards her.
She swallowed. “What were you going to say, Ben?”
“I wanted to be clear that I won’t take advantage of you. If you feel any obligation towards me for having you stay here, I won’t touch you.”
Her lips parted further as she filled her lungs, then shook her head. “No, I—I’m grateful for your hospitality, of course, but…”
Her words died as he stepped forward again, unable to resist her pull. “What do you need to know, Rose?”
She clenched her jaw, then released it in a rush. “You could start by explaining how you feel about me, because I’m at a loss. First you told me you—” Her breath caught, and she blinked, stammering over her words. “You wouldn’t be able to stop at a mere kiss, but you would never touch me. You said I wasinconvenient.”
“I never said that.”
Her nostrils flared. “You bloody well did!”
An unwelcome chuckle burst past his pursed lips, and Rose’s forest-green eyes widened. “Are you—are youlaughingat me?”
Ben shrugged as he attempted to comport himself. His fingers itched to pull the coin from his pocket. “I’ve never actually heard someone use ‘bloody’ in conversation. It’s less intimidating than you Brits think it is.”
“Are we truly going to discuss linguistic differences at a time like this?”
“Rose.” His pulse raced wildly, and he shoved his hands in his pockets to hide their trembling. To keep from pulling her into his embrace. “I never said you were inconvenient, only the attraction between us.” He grit his teeth as jealousy flared in his gut. “You’re going to get married to a fucking marquess, whatever the hell that means. I can’t put my hands on you—”
“I don’t belong to Timothy. Our marriage will mean nothing outside of a legal contract. My body is still mine and mine alone.”
“But—”
“Ben, do you want me?” Her lower lip quivered the slightest bit, and he fought the urge to slide his tongue across its surface to calm the tremors.
He stared at her for a long moment. Talking too much had gotten him into this trouble, so he would keep his answer short. “Yes.”
“But you won’t act on it.” Her expression was guarded, the trepidation creeping through her brave façade. He was close enough to see each individual lash around her eyes, the tiny flecks of golden freckles across her cheeks that would be indistinguishable one step farther away. “Do you regret what happened between us the other night?” The uncertainty in her voice was palpable, and he despised himself for causing it.
“I can’t answer that.”
“Can’t or won’t?”
Christ, this woman. Yes, he regretted kissing her because now he had the curse of knowledge. He knew the passion between them would be explosive, and that he would crave her long after she was back in England.
He regretted far more than the kiss. The woman he had thought of as a vapid, shallow creature who belonged far away from him had a depth he had never expected. Shesawhim, waited patiently and slipped past his defenses, her only intent to understand him.
Rose couldn’t love halfway, that much was clear. When she explained how she felt attraction, he knew Rose would never see what happened between them as merely physical. But Ben could not let Rose love him, not when he wasn’t capable of giving her that in return.
