“Right.” Philip rolled his shoulders back, a boxer braced for the final blow. “I’m better now. I waited until I was certain I would be strong enough for her and I’d never succumb to that disgusting habit again.”
“How can you know that for certain?” Archie asked, skepticism lacing his words.
I don’t.He pushed the intrusive thought aside, locking it away with the rest of his doubts and fears. That Lily would reject him. That he’d give her a reason to send him away.
That he’d deserve to be exiled from her.
“I know. She will see nothing but strength from me from this moment forward.”
The men glanced at each other, and after a long, heavy pause, Callum gave a nearly imperceptible nod. “Fine,” he grumbled. “We believe ye.”
Philip felt lighter than he had in weeks. “You won’t toss me out into the snow?”
“There’s still a chance,” Archie said, “but you’ve convinced us to let you stay.”
“For now.” Callum swallowed a yelp as he stuck the needle in his thumb again, then threw the thread to the table as though it had personally offended him. “Ye need to convince Lily you’ve changed.”
Archie nodded. “You’re going to have to grovel.”
Philip cocked his head. “Do what now?”
Alex nudged Ben with his elbow. “Didn’t you cross the Atlantic to grovel?”
“And walked ten miles,” Ben said with a groan.
Archie snorted. “You could have at least put on a decent suit to propose to her.”
“He doesn’t own a decent suit,” Alex put in.
“Why would I need a suit—”
“Focus, lads.” Callum narrowed his gaze on Philip. “Get on yer knees and beg forgiveness.”
Archie chuckled. “And spend the next eight years with your head between her thighs.” The others hummed in agreement, but the hope blooming in Philip’s chest withered.
“She won’t let me near her, and I can’t blame her.”
Silence for a moment, then Ben spoke. “What is it she wants?”
I wish she wanted me.“A perfect Christmas for her mother and nephews.”
Archie’s lips drew into a wide smile. “Then give her the perfect Christmas.”
“Give her chocolate,” Ben said. “Flowers, anything she likes.”
“And orgasms,” Callum put in. “Lots of those.”
Ben swatted him on the arm while Archie chuckled.
“But she needs to know she can trust you.” Alex flattened his lips, turning the mood somber once more. “And you won’t leave her again.”
The vice around his heart tightened, familiar doubts creeping in and challenging his determination. “I won’t leave. I love her too much.”
Callum pressed his hand on the table—barely avoiding impaling himself with the needle yet again—and leaned towards him. “Then ye need to prove it.” He nodded towards the others. “And if we see ye truly mean it, we’ll help ye.”
Chapter 7
BythetimetheWaverly family carriage turned onto the long drive leading to Boar’s Hill, the snow was pulling at the wheels and slowed their progress to a crawl. Lily shifted, squished as she was between Violet and Rose on one side, and Marigold, Fern, and her mother on the other. The warmth of the confined space was a relief after the sharp chill in the air in Oxford, a fierce wind whipping down the cobblestoned streets and tugging mercilessly at the garlands hanging from streetlights and storefronts.
