"I want to. At least to the wards."
"Okay." I agreed, because despite everything, I didn't really want to leave him just yet.
We made our way back through the Quarter in uncomfortable silence. The air between us charged with everything we didn't say and what we almost did.
At the ward line, I paused. Dae stopped beside me, hands in his pockets again. Casual. Like he hadn't almost kissed me ten minutes ago.
"Thank you," I said. "For listening. For understanding."
"Any time, yeobo."
There was that endearment again. I should really establish some kind of boundary before this thing between us got more complicated.
Instead, I stood on my toes and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek.
His smooth skin was cool beneath my lips. He went completely still when I did it, like I'd surprised him.
And when I pulled back, something flickered in my peripheral vision. Gold. Bright and unmistakable.
No.
Not now.
I lowered my eyes before he could see them, my heart hammering against my ribs.
"Alice."
"Don't look at me," I gasped.
"Hey, hey." Dae's voice stayed calm. "It's okay."
"It's not okay!" The words came out strangled. "I don't know what's happening."
"You kissed me on the cheek. And you got excited. That's all."
His tone was teasing, but I couldn't stop the panic building inside of me. "No. That's not what happened?—"
"It's nothing to be ashamed of." He gently took my hands and turned me to face him. "Look at me."
I couldn't. I squeezed my eyes shut, refusing to let him see. Because I knew what was happening.
My brother had golden eyes…
"Alice." His thumb stroked my wrist. "Please."
Against my better judgment, I opened my eyes. "What color are my eyes?"
Dae studied my face carefully. "They're brown," he finally said.
"Are you sure?"
"Positive." He smiled, and there was no fear in it. No disgust. Just that same gentle understanding that'd been unraveling me all night.
"I really need to go," I whispered.
"Alice, wait." He caught my wrist gently. "What are you so afraid of?"
"Everything!" The word exploded out of me. "I'm afraid of everything, Dae. I'm afraid of what I'm becoming. I'm afraid of losing my brother, or my cousin who's trying to save him. I'm afraid of the book hidden under my floorboards that I can't read. I'm afraid?—"
