“Here,” Asher says, holding out two ibuprofen in one hand and a glass of water in the other, “this should help a little.”
“Thank you.” I swallow the pills and chase them with water.
“Oh, look.” He plucks my photo from the table and holds it out. “Is this the guy?”
It’s your typical early 2010s prom photos. I am standing with Roger in front of the same mantel, but this time my wide smile doesn’t meet my eyes. Roger has his black hair slicked back, with his brown eyes trained on the camera, his mouth downturned in a scowl. We had fought earlier that day, and junior prom was effectively our last-ditch effort to save the relationship.
“That’s him.” I nod at the photo, “And my awful bangs.”
Asher chuckles, “The bangs are cute.” He sets it back on the table in front of Violet’s photo. “What happened?”
“Well, my hair grows.”
He gives me a look.
“I didn’t want to be a house bunny. I wanted to go to college with Shae, but he didn’t like that. We all know how it ended up. I guess I’ve always been at odds with my future.”
“Sometimes things work out differently.” Asher turns and leans against the wall, “Are you happy?”
“In this moment, with the chaos and the headache?”
“Yes, at this moment, even with the chaos and the headache.” He reaches out and presses his thumb between my brows, smoothing out my scowl until I relax my features.
“Yes, I am.” Even though I’m unsure of where everything is going to go with Asher, and we both seem to keep dodging the elephant-sized feelings in the room. I’m happy to have him in my life in any capacity.
“Then perhaps you’re exactly where you are supposed to be.”
Our eyes meet, and for the second or third time today, time stops, and I want to exist in this moment for as long as I can. I trymy best to convey to him how much he means to me, how much all of this means to me.
Please don’t hold any of this holiday against me, I promise I will make this up to you. You deserve so much more than being my fake plus one. I want a do-over. I want this to be real.
I have half a mind to drag him into a hall closet and kiss him silly, away from the rest of the party where it will mean something. No pausing, no doubting, just us. Exactly how it should be.
The doorbell rings, and my mother’s voice echoes through the front of the house, “Roger! I’m so glad you could make it.”
I turn to Asher, and he pushes off of the wall, holding out his hand.
“C’mon,” he says as he laces his fingers through mine, leading me into the main room so we can disappear into the crowd.
As soon as we turn the corner, my mom is ushering Roger through the doorway, her eyes lighting up when she sees us. “And there’s Penny and her friend Asher.”
Friend. I can’t believe the word actually came out of her mouth. All of this was for her, and she doesn’t even want to acknowledge my relationship, fake or not. Here I am bending over backwards to appease her, but she keeps moving the goalposts.
“Her boyfriend, actually.” Asher releases my hand, being the bigger man, and offers his, “Pleasure to meet you.”
Roger looks stunned, but he still shakes Asher’s hand, “Oh, it’s nice to meet you.” He turns to me with a nod, “Penny.”
“Hey, Mom, can I talk to you in private?” I ask through my polite smile.
“Sure, sweetheart.” My mom turns to the others, “If you’ll both excuse us.”
As we walk back to the kitchen, I can tell by her body language that she’s frustrated to have to leave the party to talk to me. In her mind, she had done nothing wrong, and for a split second; I’ve lost my confidence. I am suddenly a little girl again, having to tell her I broke a glass and being reminded how rabbits should act.
The door barely closes before she turns to me, “That was kind of rude, Penny.”
“Rude? Rude is inviting my ex-boyfriend to the family Christmas party without even consulting me or asking me how I feel about it and then disrespecting my relationship in front of everyone.” I gesture to the other room.
“I’m only looking out for you, Penny. It’s what a mother is supposed to do.” She folds her arms across her chest.
