That she loved him.
Sun battered against Rusty’s eyelids, the warmth of it heating her face.
She didn’t open her eyes, couldn’t, not yet. There’d been some complications after Reid’s operation. He’d cracked his head hard when he’d hit the ground, and there’d been some swelling. They’d decided to keep him under for a few days.
The swelling had gone down the day before, but he hadn’t woken up yet. She was terrified. What if he didn’t wake up? What if she never got to look into those pale brown eyes and tell him that she loved him?
So no, she couldn’t open her eyes. She wasn’t ready. Couldn’t bear to look at him lying there, so still. Not yet.
Alex and Piper had stopped by with a change of clothes and some decent food. Not that she could eat anything.
Law had brought Reid’s mother to the hospital that first night, and they’d sat together in this room every day. But right now, she was alone. Carol had left hours ago, had gone home to get some sleep, grab a shower. And Rusty had curled up in the chair by the window, the one right by Reid’s bed, and had tried to catch a few minutes sleep. She’d obviously slept longer than she intended because now it was morning. She couldn’t just lie here, hiding. Reid needed her to be strong, no matter how hard, how painful it was.
Brushing her hair off her face, she dragged her eyes open and turned to his bed.
A pair of pale brown eyes stared back.
She blinked, couldn’t move, could barely breathe—just held his gaze, unable to look away.
“Rusty?”
That rough voice went through her, over her, caressing her. She blinked again, and a hot tear streaked down her face. Still she couldn’t move, throat too tight to speak.
“Baby…don’t cry.” He reached out and took her hand, bringing it to his lips, the same way she had his that first night. His lips were warm and dry. “Come here.”
“You’re awake.”
“Yeah, baby. Now come here.”
“You’re going to be okay.” She started shaking, not realizing until that moment how truly terrified she’d been, scared out of her mind that he might never wake up, that he might have suffered permanent damage. Her teeth started chattering and another tear fell, followed by another.
“Shit.” He tightened his grip on her hand. “Foxy, you gotta come here.” He started to struggle in his bed, trying to get up, and that managed to break through the shock, the paralyzing relief.
Scrambling off the chair, she went to him. The grip he had on her hand moved to her wrist, and he gently tugged her closer. “Get up here.”
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Now, Foxy. I need to feel you beside me.”
Still shaking, she climbed up beside him as careful as she could, and when she wriggled in close, one of his arms slid around her shoulders, and he pulled her in tight. That’s when she felt it.
He was shaking, too.
They lay there, wrapped around each other for a while, neither one speaking, just holding on. She’d had conversations with him in her head while she’d waited for him to wake up. But now, her tongue wouldn’t form the words. She was still too overwhelmed by everything that had happened, by the strength of her feelings for the wounded man in her arms. And those wounds weren’t just physical.
She tried to sit up. “Do you need anything? I should probably get a nurse or something. They’ll want to know you’re awake.”
“Stay right where you are.” His grip tightened. “They know I’m awake. I opened my eyes four hours ago. Law’s been in here as well.” His thumb moved against the bare skin of her arm. “He told me you haven’t left my side in four fuckin’ days, Foxy. You’ve barely left this room.” His mouth pressed against the top of her head, and he spoke against her hair. “Tell me. Why’d you do that? Why have you sat at my side, holding my hand, for four days?”
His voice was rough, full of need and anguish. It broke her heart all over again. “I…I couldn’t stay away. Reid…I…”
“Say it. I need to hear you say it, Rusty.”
He sucked in a breath, and she felt him hold it, chest stilling and staying that way, while his heart hammered against her hand. She tipped her face back and stared up at him, then, reaching up, cupped his jaw. His beard, thicker than usual, tickled her palm. Looking into his eyes, her mind cleared. All the speeches she’d practiced weren’t important anymore, none of it was.
She brushed her thumb over his whiskers, across his lips. “I didn’t leave because I love you, Reid Parker. More than I’ve ever loved anyone in my entire life. And from now on, I’m staying right here, by your side.” She turned her face into him and kissed his chest, then looked up into his eyes. “That a good enough reason for you?”
He released his breath on a whoosh and squeezed his eyes shut for several long seconds. “I won’t fuck it up again. I promise you that. I’m sorry, Rusty. I…”
