Page 67 of Dissipate


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THANKSGIVING DAY WAS here.

Pamela and I were in the kitchen cooking. Savory smells infiltrated the air. Peeling potatoes was a task I could do with my eyes closed, having peeled thousands of them at The Society. Aiden and Brooklyn had run to the store to get the right kind of cranberry sauce. Something about it needing to be jellied versus whole cranberries. I had no idea.

A sense of love filled the air, more so than the previous days here. It was amazing how a holiday brought people together.

“Are you sure that there isn’t a dish you want us to cook for dinner tonight?” Pamela was mixing what she called dressing. A light smattering of flour was on the front of her brown apron with a turkey on it.

Nearing the end of my pile, I kept peeling with efficiency. “I’m sure. My mom wasn’t big on tradition before she died.”

From the corner of my eye, I saw Pamela stop for a second and look my way. “Aiden told me your mom had died. I’m so sorry. Do you have any other family?”

This question was easy to answer. “I don’t. It’s just me.”

Until now, Pamela and I hadn’t been alone together. I’d imagine she probably had some questions for me. My mom had wanted to talk to Matthew when we’d first hung out.

We slipped back into our tasks. Thoughts wandered to Stacy. Honestly, I felt sorry for her. I knew what it was like to have your life turned upside down.

Yesterday, Pamela had been there while Stacy called Trent. Surprisingly enough, Trent drove up. Pamela, upon their request, went with them to tell Stacy’s parents.

From what Aiden had told me, Trent and Stacy both agreed they weren’t ready and wanted to put the baby up for adoption. Stacy’s parents didn’t care what she did as long as she didn’t bring the baby home or show anyone around here that she was pregnant.

How could someone really keep something like being pregnant a complete secret? How could parents turn their back on family? I could see why Stacy had come here for help first.

Pregnancy was definitely something I did not want to deal with.

The faucet turned on as I finished the last potato. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone peel that fast, Kenzie.”

“I’ve had practice. We ate potatoes growing up. It was one of my jobs to peel them when we cooked.” The memory warmed me. When we’d both got kitchen duty, Mom would bake the bread and I would peel the potatoes. It was fun when we were pared together on our tasks at The Society.

The faucet turned off and Pamela dried her hands. “I see why my son is so taken with you.” That was an abrupt subject change. Fiddling with the peeler, I looked anywhere but at Pamela. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you, Kenzie. It’s just that you have a purity about you, a rare sincerity. He’s an old soul, mature beyond his years. You’re the same and complement each other.”

It was good to hear something on a part I thought was getting darkened within me with all the lies I’d told. “Thank you. That means a lot.”

“I know you and Aiden are young, but I can see how much you love each other. You know, Kenneth and I met in college too.”

That had me setting the peeler aside in curiosity. “Really? I didn’t know that. You don’t think it’s too fast with how strong we feel for each other?”

I desperately needed a mom’s advice. Until I’d met Pamela, I hadn’t realized how much.

Placing her hand on my shoulder, she responded, “No, I don’t. I think when you fight the inevitable you cause yourself more heartache. You’re Aiden’s perfect match, I feel it.”

“Me, too.”

Going to hug Pamela, I caught myself, not knowing if it was too soon to hug her. As I was beginning to withdraw, Pamela brought me to her. Her warm loving arms came around me snugly. Tears stung the back of my eyes. A lump formed in my throat.

“Sweetie, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.” That was a mom’s voice full of love.

“Thank you. You don’t know what that means to me.”

She patted my back. “I do. I lost my mom when I was young.”

I blurted out, shocked, “How old?”

She ducked her head. “Fifteen. Sometimes it’s nice to have a safe place to talk.”

“Yes, it is.”

IF I TOOK one more bite, I was sure I would pop. Thanksgiving was a holiday I enjoyed very much. Turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, dressing, cranberry sauce, and more, laid before us.

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