We exchange a look full of meaning, and I clear my throat nervously.
‘So there’s this girl I like,’ Adam says, smiling directlyinto my eyes. ‘I mean, Ireallylike her. We’ve been friends for agesbut just recently I’ve started to think I’d like us to be more than that. Youknow?’
I nod eagerly, my heart beating fast. ‘I know exactly whatyou mean. And honestly, you should tell her. Don’t waste another minute. Justgo ahead and tell her how you feel.’
‘You think so?’
‘Definitely.’ I take his hand with a secret smile. ‘Youmight regret it forever if you don’t.’
He takes in a breath and blows it out slowly. ‘Okay. Well, Iwill, then.’ His broad smile envelops me in a feeling of warmth and happiness,almost entirely blocking out thoughts of today’s car chase.
Doug who?
‘Go on, then.’ I throw Adam a teasing look.
He laughs. ‘You want me to tell her how I feelnow?’
‘Well, there’s no time like the present.’ I smile at himexpectantly.
‘But she’ll be stock-taking.’
I look at him, confused. Then I realise it must be one ofhis jokes. ‘Taking stock of her life, you mean?’ I chuckle softly. ‘You’reright there. I think you must be psychic.’
‘No, I mean she’ll actually be stock-taking. She does it onthe same night every week.’
A thorn of doubt pierces my confidence.What on earth’she talking about?
He’s smiling now. ‘You must know who I’m talking about. Ithought you might twig when we were in the newsagents the other day.’
‘Twig? In the newsagents?’ I stare at him as the truthelbows its way forward.
A faint blush stains his cheeks. ‘I felt a bit awkward abouttelling you. But I’m glad I have now.’
The realisation, when it hits, feels like a slap across theface with a big wet fish.
‘Oh, my God.Amanda?’
CHAPTERTHIRTY-FOUR
It’s the morning after Ialmostmade thebiggest fool of myself ever by coming on to Adam. I’m feeling like a bag ofrubbish that’s been left out overnight and scavenged by nocturnal creatures, dampteabags everywhere.
After Adam’s confession about fancying Amanda, I put on theperformance of my life pretending to be pleased and excited for him. Honestly,I deserve a Bafta and an Oscar and every single award going. Because inside, Iwas feeling... well, plain jealous. Of Amanda. And utterlydeflated.
I’ve had a long time to think about my feelings for Adam,lying wide awake with him snoring in the next room. And I’ve realised that deepdown, I always had this feeling in the back of my head that we’d end uptogether. I knew Adam liked me – and possibly had feelings for me that weremore than platonic – and I liked it. Because I felt the same way. It was almostas if he was my safety net, and if all my other attempts at relationshipsfailed, it would be okay because Adam was there, waiting for me to discoverthat we were right for each other.
What a bloody deluded idiot!
OfcourseAdam hasn’t been waiting around for me tohave that ‘light bulb’ moment. We’re friends. Really good friends. Andactually, that’s something to be treasured. Not that it makes me feel anybetter right now, knowing Adam is likely to be all happy and loved up any daynow. I mean, I’m pleased for him. Of course I am. It’s just that his romanticjoy highlights how completely disastrous my own love life is...
Did Doug spend the night with Floaty Nightie Woman?
Seeing him at the door of that big fancy house in hisbattered old Peugeot just confirmed my suspicions that Doug is not to betrusted around money. It’s a little weird that he paid for our stay at TheBalmoral, but maybe that was all part of his plan – to lure me into a falsesense of security. Scammers are so devious. And like a fool, I fell for it,hook, line and sinker...
I make myself a coffee and sit on a stool at the island,staring out at the garden, feeling lost and alone. It’s been such a comfortwith the April situation having Adam’s company, but I definitely don’t want tocontinue living out here, in the middle of nowhere, with a man who has the hotsfor someone else and just bloody sheep for company apart from him, and owning apowerful car I’m scared to drive and can’t even park properly! Plus I’ve noidea who I can trust anymore because having allowed April and Doug into mylife, I’m clearly the worst judge of character ever.
I mean, obviously I can trust Carrie and my old workcolleagues and all my friends from the Little Duck Pond Café. But the problemis, I hardlyseeany of them these days, living out here. I see Carrie,but not as often because I can’t just phone up on a whim and nip over for acoffee when I feel like it. We have to plan in advance, which just isn’t thesame.
Sighing, I slide off the stool and stack my crockery in thedishwasher. I can’t expect Adam to stay here much longer – far away fromcivilisation and Amanda.
