I shake my head. I can’t go back in time, I can only move forward. I now find the courage to start packing. I don’t overthink it,don’t let myself second-guess I just pack. Because the truth is, I can’t function without Genevieve Brown.
My phone rings over on my bed and I’m tempted to ignore it, but it could be Genevieve so I grab it. When I look at the caller ID I’m immediately disappointed that it’s not her, it’s my mom. I still want to ignore it, but I don’t because I haven’t spoken to her in a while. She typically just calls me whenever she’s going on a new trip. It’s almost always with a different man, but I stopped caring after boy toy number three.
“Hey mom,” I say.
“Hey! Whatcha doing?” She asks.
“Just got off work,” I reply. I don’t need to tell her everything that’s going on in my life.
“Awesome, baby. I was just calling to let you know I’m going on a cruise tomorrow! Can you believe it?” She says. Of course I can believe it, she goes on vacation every other week at this point. But I lie to her and instead say, “no I can’t mom, that’s awesome!” Truth is, I really am happy for my mom. She deserves to be happy just as much as anyone. She’s been through hell and back with my father so if all she wants to do now is island hop with younger guys, so be it.
“Junior and I are going to the Bahamas, Jamaica and Haiti! Want me to bring you something back?” She asks.
Junior? That’s this kid’s new name, how ironic. My mom is known for being a cougar, but his name just makes it all even worse.
“No, it’s okay, you two kids have fun. Call me when you’re back! Love you!” I tell her in an attempt to end the call.
“Alright then baby. Love you!” She says then hangs up.
Now I can really get to packing.
***
The next day we get up bright and early and hit the road. It was a bit bittersweet leaving the apartment with Derek for the last timebecause we would no longer be roommates, but I might come back with a different roommate who I’m in love with.
Derek starts the drive with his mostly packed Jeep wrangler and we hit US-34 West in no time. It doesn’t take us long to reach the Nebraska border, and once we do I’m starting to grow nervous by the minute.
“How do you even know where she lives?” I ask Derek.
“I may or may not have texted Lana and told her we're coming. She gave me the address,” He says.
“Does Gen know?” I ask a little hesitantly.
“No, relax dipshit. She said she wouldn’t say anything. But she also said to not screw it up. So don’t screw it up dipshit,” he says.
“Alright alright,” I tell him. Now I’m even more nervous. I wouldn’t put it past Lana to secretly know how to fight and flip me on my back if I hurt Genevieve again. Not that I’m going to hurt her, I never would. I just want to love her and hold her the rest of my life.
That’s all.
“Okay good, so tell me your game plan,” Derek says.
“Game plan? I thought you were just gonna drop me off, I find her and tell her I’m sorry,” I admit.
“You were really just planning on winging it?”
“Well sort of.”
“Yeah no, this is exactly how you lost her in the first place, you winged it. No more of that shit. I like her and I like her for you, so you’re gonna go big or go home buddy,” he tells me.
“I guess I’m going big,” I tell him, holding my breath.
He pats me on the back, shaking me a little, keeping the other arm on the wheel. “Now that’s the spirit! Mission win Genevieve back is in motion!” He says.
Yup, I think to myself. Letting my breath out. Mission win Genevieve back is in motion.
I just can’t screw this up.
My thoughts pause when I get a notification on my phone. It’s a message from my bank saying my direct deposit from my savings to my checking of two hundred dollars went through successfully. Now I have the money in my account, ready to send to my dad.
