“How many times do I need to tell you to stop calling me that?” I ask and she laughs.
“Oh well, get over it big bro. Now let’s go build a snow man!” She cheers, spinning to swing the door open and as she does she slams into the legs of our father who has a murderous look on his face.
“Itold you both. No outside when no one is home. Alexandra, take off your snow things and get in the basement.” he orders and I cringe. I know what that means and I don’t like it one bit. She shakes her head furiously as tears stream down her face. She looks at me with fear in her eyes but there’s nothing I can do. Maddox told me to mind my own business. To act like I don’t know nothing. That I don’t see anything but when I told him I want to stab my father, he punched me in the face telling me I’m not strong enough. That I will be dead before the knife even pierces his skin. Ali’s screams take me out of my thoughts and I run out of the house with my father shouting after me. I can’t be in this house while this happens. So I run, until I can’t anymore…
Grabbing the bottle I take another long gulp and wipe the tears that fall from my eyes.I’m not weak. I am not weak.I bring the lighter to the joint sparking it up again. Taking a pull, I exhale and take another gulp, finally feeling the liquor flowing through my veins. My chest is so tight and all I feel is sadness. I growl, getting up from the bed and stumbling as I look around for my phone. I need a distraction. I don’t want to think of my childhood or anything else for tonight. Finally finding my cellular device, I seea million missed calls from Parker and Lucius but I ignore them, swiping through my contacts I see her name and I want to throw my phone across the room but I take a deep breath and another hit of the joint then exhale as I pull up a text thread.
Me:
You fucked up tonight!
Finishing off the J, I flick it out of the opened french doors and into the snow then take another swig from the bottle and place it down on my desk. Despite the doors being opened, it’s stifling in here, so I take off my shirt and throw it into the hamper. My phone pings and I smirk.
Liv:
Can I come talk to you? Where are you?
Me:
Where is my jersey?
The room spins a bit but all I keep seeing is her in that mother fuckers Jersey. I clench my jaw still pissed I lost the game over her. Luckily tomorrow night is Cemetery Man Hunt night. Boys versus girls.She better fucking be there.I plan on making her fucking payfor every minute that fucking jersey was on her back.Fuck, what is it about this fucking girl that has me so fucked up?She’s gorgeous, no doubt, but that can’t be it. The pull every time she’s near doesn’t help, but fuck, I need to just let it go. Taking another swig from the bottle, I walk back over to my bed and swipe out of the thread with Liv and scroll down the list of girls I can hit up. Fuck it. Might as well get black out drunk where I can’t see or think and fuck one of the many dumb sluts at this school.
Me:
Wanna fuck?
Tiffany:
God, yes. Can I bring a friend?
Me:
Absolutely. I’m in my room. See you soon.
Nothing like a two for one special.
The next night, I’m walking through the maze, heading for the cemetery gates. A few girls giggle ahead of me as they walk out of the maze and up the cobblestone path through the dense fog approaching the old iron doors. I step around them, digging in my pocket for the wrought iron key to unlock the gate. After doing so, I remove the lock and chain, hanging it on the lever as I push the heavy metal, swinging it open for everyone to enter. The cemetery is located at the highest point of the mountain overlooking the river. The cathedral is just beyond the cemetery with a mausoleum attached to the back of the building. Last night was a mistake. I should’ve never gotten that drunk and I shouldn’t have fucked those girls but I’m an impulsive son of a bitch and make poor choices. I did however, text Ivy to meet me here tonight. So now I’m in a bit of a pickle. I just couldn't get over being hurt by Liv. I thought that by writing her that poem, she was the one I needed— the one my soul spoke to with just one look and now I’m second guessing myself. She never answered me and I never wrote heragain. Hopefully tonight she will be here and I can give her a piece of my mind.
Walking to the far end of the cemetery, I sit on a concrete bench and wait until I spot one of the guys. They deserve an apology for my actions, but I needed to cool down or I was going to lose it. I’m sure they know how disappointed I am in myself but I still need to apologize. Buckman will be lucky if he even makes it through the night, he might stand a chance so long as he steers clear of me. I still haven’t faced the news my father dropped on me the other night about my brother. It doesn’t feel real and I’m not sure how to navigate all this alone. He didn’t really like me much because I didn’t want the life he had, so I was nothing but an immature little pissant to him. The only time we bonded was when he taught me to kill. Other than that, he kept his life private and had his own demons to deal with.
Footsteps crunching as they slowly approach in the snow has me lifting my head to see Liviana. My eyes trail up her legs, taking in the black fishnet stockings covering her thick thighs. I take my time; slowly raking over her short black leather skirt up to the white tank top she’s wearing under her black croppedzip-up hoodie, showing off her perfect fucking cleavage. Not wanting to look at her for another second, I stand before she crowds my space.
“I’ve been looking for you!” She shouts.
“Get the fuck away from me!” I spit walking away from her, but she shoves me and I stumble into a headstone. Spinning, I get in her face.
“If you don’t fucking walk away now, I’m going to fucking hurt you!” I growl, but she just rolls her eyes.
“I’m sick of this fucking game, Hayes. What are you so mad about?” She shouts, putting her hand on her hips.
“Mad is an understatement Liviana. You show up to my game, late, in another man's jersey after I specifically told you to wear mine. What fucking game are you playing with me?” I grit, raising a brow as she huffs.
“I’m not playing any fucking games, asshole. He forced me to wear it!” She fires back, and my vision blurs as she continues to speak. Whooshing sounds flow through my ears as I hear keywords that make me irate.“Forced. Made. Can’t. Hurt. Blood.”Her voice echoes in the distance, even if she’s standing in myspace. Memories flood for a split second but I push through not wanting to go there. Not now! Not in front of her!
Growling, I move to take off through the cemetery, but she grabs my wrist and I quickly wretch it out of her grip.
“Go enjoy the party. I have something to handle,” I spit, walking quickly through the cemetery, disappearing into the dense fog.“Forced. Made. Can’t. Hurt. Blood.” Those words keep whirling in my head as I search for the fucker I’m going to kill tonight. Weaving through a sea of people, I spot him talking to a few girls. Taking out my phone, I send him a text to meet me behind the cathedral.
