“What about the rest of the agreement?”
“That’s entirely up to you. If what has passed between us has made you uncomfortable, we’ll visit Beckwith tomorrow, see the agreement properly terminated and you paid. I’ll honor the yearly salary and the three-month achievement. With that and what you won last night, you should be able to set yourself up nicely, so you can be selective in choosing your lover.”
“I’d rather continue to teach the ladies.” She gave him a tentative smile. “I’ve determined an occupation for each of them that I think they’ll find very fulfilling. To be honest, I want to help them move beyond here. I would find satisfaction in it, fulfillment. And I should think I would be hard to replace.”
He almost confessed she’d be impossible to replace.
If he didn’t have to tutor her, he could put some distance between them, perhaps ignore this constant undercurrent of want and need. “No sitting on my lap in carriages, that sort of thing.”
She nodded. “You and I would simply strive not to tempt each other. Because you’re a natural temptress as well.”
His deep laughter echoed between them. “I can honestly say I’ve never been called that.”
She smiled. “But we can be friends, can’t we?”
“We can certainly try.”
Chapter 19
Before she’d left his study, he mentioned he’d be dining with his mum that night, so she didn’t expect him at dinner, yet still, she missed him. In her bedchamber, she thought about what he’d taught her that afternoon, what he probably hadn’t meant to teach her: he wanted her as much as she wanted him. But she understood his struggles with their attraction to each other, his need to be honorable. She admired him for them. She was going to strive very hard not to be a temptress, to develop a deep and abiding friendship with him. Perhaps when the ladies all left, things could go further between them.
As he was no longer giving her lessons, she had no reason to go to the library at ten, yet still she went, carrying his book with her. If he wasn’t there, she would read.
Only he was there, as was her glass of sherry.
As he came to his feet, she was relatively certain she saw a measure of relief cross over his features for the briefest of moments. Or perhaps it was simply a reflection of what she felt, the joy that spiraled through her because he was here, quite possibly anticipating her arrival if the offering was any indication. “You knew I’d come.”
“I’dhopedyou’d come.”
In this particular circumstance, she thoughthopingwasa good deal better thanknowing. Hope involved wishes, desires, and wants. In some cases, even dreams.
She wandered over to her chair, sat, took pleasure from watching him fold his large body into the cushioned chair. It was rather relaxing knowing there would be no lesson, not wondering when it might begin or what it would entail. “How was your visit with your mother?”
“Enjoyable, as always. Too much food.”
“Were your siblings there?”
“No. We all gather to be with her one Sunday a month and strive to ensure at least one of us has dinner with her during the week.”
“It’s good that you appreciate her, spend time with her. It’s hard when they’re no longer with us.”
“I’m sorry you lost your mother.”
She nodded, fought not to miss her, not to travel down a path of melancholy.
He shifted in his chair. “As I’ve been distracted of late, I’ve failed to let you know that Lady Jocelyn’s father will pay Beth for her work.”
“How did you manage that?”
He lifted a shoulder, tilted his head. “We had a little chat and he agreed it wouldn’t do for word to get around London that he didn’t honor his debts, especially as he’s interested in investing in one of Mick’s ventures.”
“I’m so glad to hear that. Thank you for ensuring Beth didn’t pay a price for her kindness.”
“It was a simple enough matter to take care of.”
She rather doubted that. She reached for her sherry. It was only then that she noticed the long, slender box secured with string resting beside it. Her gaze jumped to his.
“It’s for you.” His outstretched legs, his hands folded over his stomach, gave the impression he was relaxed, unconcerned. Yet, she also sensed a bit of tension in him, as though he feared her disappointment.
