She’d been right not to have gotten up from the chaise longue when he’d delivered the beginning of this kiss because her legs could barely support her now and were in danger of melting away completely. However, based on the tight hold he had on her, she’d probably remain upright—as long as his lips stayed on hers. She clung to him as though he was her salvation.
How was it possible for something so simple to be so breathtaking?
She had to believe that he was drawing out the kiss because he found it as rewarding. Low groans emanated from him, and each was music to her ears, that she had the ability to entice such glorious sounds from him. She wasn’t quite certain she’d find the strength to return to the ballroom when all she craved was to remain here and enjoy all the sensations he brought to life within her. She’d never imagined something without coils and springs could be so complex and complicated. Could fascinate her in so many various ways. Thathecould fascinate her so. She had the fanciful thought that she could stay here with him forever.
But, of course, she couldn’t, and he seemed to be drawing the kiss to a close because he went quiet and cupped her face before easing away from her.
“We’ve come to the end, haven’t we?” she asked. She was nothing if not inquisitive, needing to know all the answers. And the certainty of them.
“Yes.” He traced his thumb over her lower lip, and she wondered how he’d managed to unerringly find it within this blackened abyss. “How is it that you’d never been kissed? You’re certainly adventurous enough, going to the Elysium as you did, meeting me here in this alcove.”
Adventurous? She supposed worse descriptions could apply to her behavior: scandalous, naughty, sinful. Mama would toss all of those at her if she ever learned what Leonora had done. But Rook was no doubt striving to be tactful, just in case they became partners in the enterprise. “Not to mention that I’m an old maid with years to have done it?”
“You’re hardly old. But surely you had suitors.”
“No, I wasn’t really interested in any of the men in my life. Mother focused all her efforts on Sam, believed he’d be her entry into proper Society. He’s handsome, charming, certain to catch some lady’s eye. I, on the other hand, am too stubborn, not nearly obedient enough, too inquisitive about the wrong sort of things—”
“Like kissing?”
She laughed lightly, finding it difficult to believe that her curiosity about kissing was wrong. Truly where was the harm in what she’d done? No scarletKmarred her bodice. She wouldn’t get with child. She’d given away nothing of import. “I don’t care one whit about all the different embroidery stitches and how they can be used to create beautiful samplers. I care about mechanical things.”
She stopped, aware of the heat rushing to her cheeks because she was blathering on, found him so easy to blather to. She’d never shared with any other man the things she enjoyed.
“Such as,” he prodded.
“I’m on the cusp of boring you to tears.”
“I’m curious. Tell me.”
She knew what it was to be curious, to be constantly searching for the answers. She took a deep, fortifying breath. “When I was eight, I took my father’s pocket watch apart. Mama was furious when she discovered all the pieces laid out on the table. Sent me to bed without my supper. My father’s punishment was so much worse. The disappointment in his eyes nearly cleaved me in two. The next day he sat me in front of that table and simply said, ‘Put it back together so that it works.’ I remembered where each spring, gear, andwheel went. When I had completed the task, not only did it work but I understood how.”
“I haven’t a bloody clue.”
“I could explain it, but it’s not very titillating conversation without a demonstration of all the parts involved. Besides, taking a watch apart once in my life was more than enough.” In his will, her father had left the timepiece to her, not to Sam. That, too, had upset her mother. “Afterward, if I wanted to know how something worked, my father would take me to someone who could show me with diagrams or to a factory where I could observe the item being assembled. Trains, music boxes, anything with a part that moved. And if it was something he could purchase for me, I was allowed to take it apart. It all fascinated me. I found it so exciting. But... when a gentleman gives you attention, is dancing with you or taking you on a walk about the park, his eyes tend to glaze over when you’re explaining the various types of levers and how effectively they can be used. I suspect yours have glazed over by now but it’s too dark for me to see.”
“I promise you they haven’t. But you’ve yet to fully explain how it is that you avoided being kissed. Do continue.”
Avoided, as if it had been her choice. Although she suspected in a way it had been. “Over time, I developed a reputation for being a bit... strange. I once overheard—”
She stopped abruptly. She’d indulged in a glass of champagne earlier. It was loosening her tongue. Or maybe it was the intoxication of the kiss. Or perhaps it was merely the keen interest of the lord before her.
“What did you overhear?”
She shook her head. “It was nothing really.”
“If it was truly nothing, I don’t think you would have stopped. Whatever you overheard must have had a profound effect. You can trust me with your secrets.”
He already knew one of them: her visit to the Elysium. And she’d trusted him with her mouth. “It’s silly and I probably give it too much credence, but I heard a gentleman tell a group of his friends that I would probably explain the force behind a...”—she cleared her throat, giving herself a few seconds to find the courage to repeat exactly what he’d said or to find the proper metaphor that would convey the ugliness of it—“force behind a... a thrust... on my wedding night.”
Her cheeks scalding with embarrassment, she rushed on. “I’ll never forget how quickly the gentlemen agreed, even as they were laughing. I stopped going to balls, spent more time with my father because he didn’t seem to mind my curiosity. Now you know my whole life story.”
And she could scarcely believe she’d shared all that with a stranger who wasn’t truly a stranger. Or perhaps he was only partially a stranger. There was so much she didn’t know about him; wished he could be taken apart so she could understand every aspect of him. Because what she did know rather fascinated her.
“I very much doubt you’ve shared your entire life. You’re too complicated for such a simple story. And those other blokes were right fools. I consider myself fortunate to have provided your first kiss. I hope only that I haven’t set unrealistic expectations for any other gents who might come your way.”
She understood that he was hoping for the exact opposite. This man certainly didn’t lack confidence. He’d also gone unerringly still as if he’d been taken by surprise and was holding his breath in anticipationof something wondrous arriving. She wished for light with the same depth of greed that she wished for investors. She wanted to see his eyes, his face clearly, so she could determine what he was thinking because she had the sense that the teasing and ease with which he’d joked about unrealistic expectations was no longer with him. That something far more serious had taken hold of him. His thumb continued to slowly stroke her lip, and the sensations he was evoking were almost as erotic as those he’d brought to the fore with his kiss.
“If you’re absent from the ballroom much longer, you’ll be missed... if you haven’t been already. Should anyone ask, you can claim to have needed some time in the ladies’ retiring room. Just don’t close your eyes when you lie.”
