I’d spent my first two years of high school dreaming about being Leo’s girlfriend. I’d built some amazing fantasies about what that would look like.
None of those dreams even began to touch how wonderful it was.
Over that winter, after football ended, we fell into a routine. Leo picked me up for school each day. We ate lunch together, and if I didn’t always feel entirely comfortable with his football friends, that was a very small price to pay.
Nate wouldn’t eat with us, though. The first time I’d asked him, he’d looked at me like I’d sprouted a second head.
“You want me to eat with Mike Anders and Brent Collins? No, thanks.”
I’d felt that familiar tearing sensation, the one that hit me whenever Nate wanted me to do one thing and Leo asked me to do another. I hated having to choose between them.
But before I could say anything else, Nate had added, “Don’t worry about me. I’m going to start working in the computer lab over lunch anyway.”
I convinced myself that he would’ve done that, anyway. As much as I worried over Nate, it wasn’t unusual for him to do things without considering how they might affect me. He probably hadn’t even thought twice about letting me eat lunch alone.
After school, I hung out in the newspaper office while Leo lifted in the weight room. Even in the off-season, he had to keep in shape, and he’d told me the coach was working with him especially, because there had already been several colleges expressing interest in him.
My parents had laid down some rules about when we could and couldn’t go out during the school week. Leo was always welcome to join us for dinner, and he often did, although we ate with his family, too. Lisa didn’t cook very much anymore, so once or twice a week, I’d usually make dinner for the four of us.
And on weekends, we’d go out, either to the movies, to dinner or to a party. If there was any part of dating Leo that made me uneasy, it was the parties he liked. Sitting in a crowded house surrounded by drunk kids, while a cloud of smoke from the people puffing weed hung in the air, wasn’t my idea of fun. The closest thing we had to arguments were over those parties.
But even so, I was happy. Nate seemed to be recovering well from his last illness, and he and Leo had reached some sort of détente. Leo couldn’t have been a more loving or attentive boyfriend. We didn’t have many opportunities to be truly alone, so we did push a few boundaries; there were nights when Leo would sneak up to my bedroom after my parents had gone to bed. We’d turn on my TV or music to cover any noises, and then we’d make love on my bed. Afterwards, Leo held me in his arms, whispering into my ear.
“I hate that I can’t stay all night with you. I like waking up with you next to me.” He blew softly on the earlobe he’d just been nibbling.
“I know. Me, too.” I turned to face him. “But we just have another year of high school left. Then we go to college.”
Leo’s mouth tightened. “What if we end up across the country from each other? I don’t know where I’m going to go to school. It depends on who gives me the best deal.”
“So once you know, I’ll apply there, too.” I snuggled up against him, my eyes drifting shut. “Unless you don’t want me to.”
“Of course I do. But things don’t always work out. What if you don’t get in where I do? Or what if your parents want you to go somewhere else?”
I sighed. Both sets of our parents had begun making noises about us being together so much. Mine reminded me often that I was too young to base important decisions like college on my high school boyfriend and where he was going. My dad more than once brought up the appeal of making smart choices for my future.
I did a lot of nodding and smiling. But I wasn’t worried, because I knew Leo and I would work it all out. For now, life was too good to ruin it by obsessing over the future. The present was way too much fun.
“Look at us, going out on a date like real people.” Leo smiled at me from across the table. “At a restaurant, even. Not just the pizza place.”
“I’ve wanted to try this place forever.” I glanced around the dimly-lit room. “It’s supposed to be the best Italian restaurant around here.”
“Yeah, the food’s good. Coach had them cater one of our Twelfth Man dinners.”
I held up one finger. “No football talk on a date in the off-season. Remember? This is when I get you all to myself.”
Leo raised his eyebrows. “And you’ve been making good use of that time, too.” He reached for my hand. “Which reminds me. My dad and mom stayed in the city tonight, since Mom’s got an early doctor’s appointment. Guess who has the house to himself?”
I pretended to think. “Hmmm. Who could it be? Maybe Dylan or Beau?” Of all the football team, those two were the friendliest to me. They both had steady girlfriends, but Leo liked to tease me that he was jealous of the attention they paid me.
“Ha, ha, ha. I guess I won’t invite you to come have dessert ... up in my bedroom.” He leaned forward and lowered his voice. “I was going to get us canolis to go. And then paint you with the cream inside them.”
I swallowed hard. “Can we skip the entrée?”
It wasn’t surprising to me that our sexual chemistry was off the charts. Leo was a very physical guy, and he’d always been very tactile. And for someone who hadn’t really been interested in sex before now, I’d found that I loved being touched and held, as long as it was Leo making love to me.
But I was relieved, too, that we had so much else in common. We could talk football for hours—pro and college, as well as high school—and Leo had taken an interest in the newspaper, too. He’d sat in on a few layout and folding parties, making the younger girls on staff swoon when he smiled at them. He and Jake had found that they liked each other; sometimes they even played video games together, while I sat nearby reading.
Nate still wasn’t thrilled that we were dating, but slowly, he thawed enough that the three of us could hang out again. Leo and I were both careful not to make him feel like a third-wheel, and sometimes, it felt like the old days: the Trio back together again.
