Fucking idiot.
Those words echoed in my head as I watched Amanda’s car pull away from my house, from me. I heard them louder when I slowly walked back into the kitchen, into the loud stillness that reminded me I’d just chased away the only woman I’d ever loved.
“Jesus Christ!” I grabbed blindly at a glass on the counter and threw it against the wall, wincing when it shattered with a loud crash, exploding all over the floor.Great. Now I was not only miserable, I had a mess to clean up, and the action of throwing the damned glass hadn’t made me feel one bit better.
Above me, I heard the sharp click of a closing door, followed by the staccato sound of shoes coming down the stairs. A few seconds later, there was a sharp rap at my door.
“Vincent. Open this door and let me in.”
I heaved a sigh. This was what I needed. A lecture from Mrs. Literandi. Briefly, I considered the idea of ignoring her, but I knew it wouldn’t work. She was aware I was in here. There was no way she hadn’t heard Amanda and I yelling if she’d been upstairs in her own home, which apparently, she had been.
I dragged my feet to the door and opened it a crack. “Hey, Mrs. Literandi. Sorry about the noise. Everything’s okay. No need to worry.”
“Clearly that is not the case. I could hear the argument between you and that lovely young woman who’s been coming around. Now, mind you, I don’t approve of her staying the nights as I’ve noticed she has been, but still, better a nice girl like her than your typical parade of questionable females.”
Talk about digging in the knife and twisting it. “Okay, well, good talk, Mrs. Literandi. I’ll keep it down, I promise.”
“Like I said, I heard every word. And she was right, you know. The girl. You didn’t tell her about your interview because you wanted to—what is that phrase? Oh, yes—hedge your bets. If you’d told her, you would’ve felt forced into taking the job in the city or explaining to her why you didn’t. Now, from what I can tell, if you’d had a good reason for not taking it, seems to me this dear girl would’ve understood. Even if you’d told her you didn’t want to leave your family’s business—that’s a good reason. But you didn’t give her the chance to be supportive, did you?”
I shook my head mutely.
“And now, you’ve hurt her feelings.” She shook her head, clicking his tongue against her teeth. “Well, you’re going to have to grovel now, Vincent. That’s all there is to it. You’ve messed up, and now you must do your penance.”
I rubbed one hand over my hair. “I guess I do. I’m not sure I know how. I’ve never had to make up with a girl before now.”
“It’s something any man should be able to do. Believe me, you’ll have occasion to use this skill for the rest of your life. You simply admit you were wrong, apologize, and promise to try to do better in the future.” She glared at me over the top of her glasses. “And mean it. It’s worthless if you don’t mean what you say. Understand?”
I nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”
Mrs. Literandi peered over my shoulder. “Threw a glass, didn’t you? Well, we all act in anger at times. Now you clean that up and be careful doing it. You don’t want to cut your hand or your fingers. You have a broom and dust pan, don’t you?”
“Yes, I do. I can handle it.”
“All right then. I’ll let you get to it. While you sweep, you might consider offering up a prayer of confession to the Lord and ask for His forgiveness and guidance, too. It wouldn’t hurt you a bit.”
“Okay.”
My neighbor’s expression softened a bit. “Vincent, you’re not a bad boy. You just have some things to work out. My late husband, may God rest his soul—” At this, we both crossed ourselves. “He worked in his family’s business, too. Did you know that? Hardware. And it wasn’t easy. He felt as though he could never do enough to please his father. And he thought his sister was always the favorite. Of course, then he goes and married a nun, and that about capped it for him.” She chortled. “But you know, after my father-in-law passed away, my husband and his sister were talking, and they realized that they’d both had the same feelings. All that time, she’d been feeling Hal was the favored one. And their father had left them a letter, saying that he couldn’t be any prouder of them and their hard work. So don’t you be thinking you’re the only one who has to deal with this. Family is messy, and it’s painful, and it’s hard.”
I smiled a little. My mother and father had expressed this same sentiment before.
“But it’s also worth it. Listen, you clean up that glass, and you make it up with your girl, and you talk to your parents. Make it right now, Vincent. Don’t let it fester. Don’t drag it out.”
“I will. I promise.” I held my hand as though taking an oath.
“Good. You do that.”
She wheeled on one heel and began climbing the steps back upstairs, while I shut the door quietly behind her and went in search of my broom. I had a lot of cleaning up to do. And the glass was as good a place to start as any.
Vincent:Amanda, did you get home okay?
Vincent:Seriously, just answer me. One letter. Y for yes. N for no. I’m worried about
you.
Amanda:Y
Vincent:Thanks for that. I want to talk to you. Can I call? Or I can be there, at your
