For too long, I’d chosen safety and security and protecting my heart. I’d chosen work over everything else. I’d buried my passion in caring for my patients. I’d lost myself in the need to help others heal, even while I continued to hurt.
And then Emma came into my life. She never let me make the easy decisions. She challenged me at every turn, and when I thought there was no possible way for her to antagonize me more, she’d gone and made me fall in love with her.
I pushed back my chair and stood up. Suddenly, and with an urgency that awed me, I needed to see Emma. I had to hold her, to spill out to her everything I’d just realized. I wanted to stroke her hair and look into her eyes and tell her again and again how much I loved her. I wanted her to understand now, more than she ever had before, that she was everything to me, and that I was never going to leave her.
With hands that weren’t quite steady, I picked up my phone again and hit the button to call her. The phone rang and rang, but there wasn’t any answer. With a frown, I stood up, the phone still to my ear as I strode out into the hallway to see if Mira was around. Maybe Emma had told our head nurse when to expect her at the hospital—
And then I heard the sound of a song playing faintly somewhere nearby. It was vaguely familiar, something that I’d heard on pop stations or over the sound system at the grocery store. I was pretty sure Taylor Swift was the singer, and it was something about trouble.
Emma rounded the corner, fumbling in her purse, her forehead knit together as she dug round. The music was coming from that handbag.
I ended the call on my end, my grin blossoming over my face when she looked up and spotted me. “Oh—there you are. I couldn’t get to my phone to answer it, but I was looking for you anyway, so—”
“Is that the ringtone you have for me?” I wasn’t sure if I was amused or offended.
“Yup.” She was totally unrepentant. “Because it’s true. I knew you were going to be trouble the minute I saw you, and you have been.” She reached for my hand. “But the best kind of trouble, as it turns out.” Her face tipped toward mine, her eyes shining and her smile luminous.
I had so much I wanted to say, but the feelings those words conveyed were so huge that I was choking on them. Instead, I clung to her hand, staring down at her, trying to figure out where to start.
“I left Mom and Daddy with Darcy down at the nurses’ station. She’s showing them around. But I heard about what happened with Ted, so I wanted to come and find you.” She laid her hand alongside my cheek. “Are you all right?”
I gave a jerky nod. “Yeah. I’m okay. I called Gram, and it turns out he took a car out there to say good-bye to them, and then he’s going back out onto the road. Guess that’s where he wants to end it.”
“On his own terms,” Emma said, echoing Gram’s words. “I’m not surprised, but Deacon . . . I’m sorry. I suppose it was right of him to see his parents before he left, but he didn’t say good-bye to you.”
“I’m all right with that.” I squeezed her hand. “You know, as much as I’ve always known that Ted was my father, he’s never been much more than a stranger. To tell you the truth, as sad as it is to say, Miss Sissie’s passing grieved me more than Ted leaving. So did Angela’s. Ted’s just . . .” I shrugged. “A biological connection.”
“Well, you might know this already, but it’s his loss.” She tilted her head, her smile dimming slightly. “You look . . . shaken up. Did something else happen?”
I caught her wrist where it was still next to my face and turning my head, I pressed a kiss into her palm. “Yeah, something else did happen. I realized something, and I had to come find you right away. I couldn’t wait.”
“Okay.” Worry crept over her face. “What is it?”
I took a deep breath. “Emma, I love you.” I blurted out the first words, and the next ones tumbled from my mouth after them. “I love you, and I’m never going to leave you. I know that in some ways this is new between us, but it’s really not. I’ve loved you since our first argument. I’ve wanted to kiss you since the first time you told me I was wrong. No matter what happens, where we go, what we do . . . I want you to be my home. I don’t care how that works, if we live in your cabin or on the farm or wherever, but I’m not going to lose you again.” I drew her to me and framed her face with my hands. “I love you, Emma, and I want to belong to you forever.”
She blinked up at me. “Is this . . . are you proposing to me, Deacon?”
I gave a shaky laugh. “I don’t have a ring and I’m not down on one knee, and I didn’t talk to your father yet. But all that’s coming, babe. I guess right now, I’m proposing that we promise our lives to each other. Only you, only me. Come what may, for as long as we both shall live.” I kissed her softly. “I’ll make it official soon. This is even more important, though, because this is the promise. This is where we begin.”
Emma shook her head. “No, this isn’t our beginning. We began the first time we met, Deacon. This is our . . . deciding. Our choosing.” She clung to my hands, gazing at me steadily. “I’ve loved you even when I didn’t want to like you. I loved you when I told myself I had to stop. Thing is, though, I never could stop loving you, even when it felt hopeless. I couldn’t forget you, even when it hurt to remember.” She angled her head and rose up to kiss me again, her lips parting as she welcomed me. “If I didn’t stop then, I don’t think I ever will.”
The kiss we shared was the most beautiful moment I’d ever known, overflowing with promise and hope and love. So much love. I didn’t deserve it, but I was taking it all, anyway.
“I will be yours forever,” I murmured against her lips. “And you will be mine. Every moment, I’ll choose you. Can you trust me? Will you choose to be mine?”
Emma’s answering smile dazzled me, body and soul.
“With every heartbeat.”
The End
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