“Yes, absolutely. I’m all for it. I love talking about my feelings.”
Both Mom and Sadie laugh at that. The last thing I want or enjoy is talking about my feelings. I’ve always been a little lost in my own world, getting irritated quickly and getting over it even quicker. I keep the hurt and the frustrations to myself, unlike the rest of my family who just love talking about their feelings.
Maybe it’s because I’m the middle child and I always had emotions flowing over me through my sisters. There was always something happening that needed attention with them and I realized I hated any kind of attention so I just kept things to myself.
“Okay, we’re going for lunch after this. Harvey was just telling us about a Christmas market and I thought we could do that this evening?” Mom says.
“Sounds fun!” I agree, forcing all the cheer I didn’t feel into my words.
Sienna and Harvey exchange numbers in case anything goes wrong with the booking. I take a chance to really look at Harvey. She’s gorgeous, tall and statuesque, the kind of woman I thought Connor would prefer. Her eyeliner is perfect, the wing sharp, hair pulled back into a ponytail with some strands left to frame her face.
I love her immediately. She has the kind of vibe that makes me feel comfortable, that invites me to open up and be herfriend. I see it for the danger it is. I can’t open up to her if she’s Connor’s friend.
As we’re walking out of the lodge, she looks at me and grins.
I stop, letting my family go in front of me. “There wasn’t a mix up with the booking, was there?”
Harvey shrugs innocently. “I’m not at liberty to say.”
“I don’t know what he thinks he’s doing but my sister’s wedding is very important to me and if he does anything to mess it up, he’s going to regret it,” I say.
Harvey nods once. “I’ll pass that along to him.”
I open my mouth to say more but my words get stuck in my throat when Connor walks out the door behind the reception desk. He’s been running his hands through his hair because it’s that perfect, floppy mess. I hate that I still remember what it felt like to run my hands through his hair.
He freezes when he sees me and for a second, we’re locked in a stare-off. Looking at him makes my heart hurt, like someone has reached inside my chest and wrapped their hand around it.
He moves forward, opening his mouth.
I look away from him to Harvey. “Thank you for your help.”
And then I walk away without another word, just like he did.
SIX
CONNOR
“She hates you, Connor,” Harvey says, as we watch Scarlett walk out of the lodge.
“I wouldn’t have guessed by the way she refuses to talk to me,” I say. Something tugs inside my chest seeing Scarlett walk away. Some vicious part of me wants to kidnap her and lock her away until she forgives me.
“No, she, like,reallyhates you,” Harvey says. Her dark eyes look gleeful.
“Are you sure you’re my best friend, and not my worst enemy?” I raise an eyebrow at Harvey.
“No, that would be your brothers.”
Harvey turns and walks towards her office. I have other things to worry about than my brothers right now, but I also can’t let them do whatever they want because they’re either going to get themselves killed or get someone else killed.
“Tell me honestly, should I move on?”
I’m thirty-eight years old and the head of this fucked up family since my grandfather died. Scarlett was eleven years younger, and those eleven years felt like a chasm between us now like they never did before.
I sit down in the visitor’s chair across from Harvey’s desk and run a hand through my hair. I’ve regretted every day I’ve been back. Not only leaving Scarlett but also coming back here as my grandfather requested and taking over this family.
“Trying to get your brothers to act like humans?” Harvey asks. “Yes, that’s a lost cause. You’re better off focusing on yourself.”
“I meant, with Scarlett. Should I move on?”
