“That’s fine,” I reply, unable to keep the ironic laugh out of my voice. This is such a fucked up situation, but everything in my gut tells me it’s the right thing to dodespitemy shifter wolf hating it. “The less I have to see of you, the better for the both of us.”
“This is fuckin’ nuts.”
“Just think of the money.” I extend my hand to him. “Deal?”
“Deal.”
He still has a grip on my hand when it happens, faster than I anticipated, my wolves growling in warning as this young alpha takes the lead on a process I should be controlling. He accepts me as his alpha, though the moment his presence settles in my mind it is unequivocallyunsettled, a seething, violent anger aimed directly at me. I growl in warning and so does he, daring to step even closer, ignoring the fact that I have a couple of inches and at least fifty pounds on him as he gets up in my face, lips pulling back in a snarl. I catch his fist before he can land his punch and shove him backwards against the house, acting on instinct as I get my forearm across his throat.
“Don’tfuckingtry me!” I growl with the full weight of my alpha bark. “I am your alpha. Youwillobey me. Stand down!”
The yelp of pain from his wolf is loud enough to sense through the bond, the impact of my words draining the fight out of him instantly. I’ve still got him trapped by the throat, his breath rasping as I snarl in his face, my teeth bared in warning.Kill him,my wolf urges, stronger than I’ve ever felt before.Kill him now.
No. Now fuck off,I bite back.
“You willnotattack me,” I growl, every word still a barking command, and in my head I still hear the voice of my father saying the same damned thing, barking in my face, his hand around my neck as he pressed me against the wall in our home. I’d been sixteen at the time — angry, bitter, and close to his height — and had landed a punch to his face out of nowhere. “Not now, not ever. Your job is to protect the pack, including my mate. Your goal is to uphold the agreement we have, understand?”
“Yes, alpha,” he bites out through gritted teeth, playing tough despite the fact that I have his complete submission.
“Good.We both want to survive this,” I say with a final shove, echoing my father’s words. “We’re going to.”
I leave immediately, my hands shaking with adrenaline as I climb into my car. They’re still shaking five minutes later as I pull into the next bay along the coastline, hastily parking on the bank above the beach and throwing my door open so I can puke on the grass.
“Fuck,” I groan, spitting one final time before closing the door and leaning back in my seat, breathing heavily. My phone is blowing up with questions from the rest of the pack — they can sense when others join us — and I switch it to silent, ignoring all the notifications apart from Ellie’s quick,
You okay?
Fine, it’s done. Be home soon.
I should keep driving, but instead I stare out at the ocean — it’s a dreary autumn day and the sun is close to setting, making the water appear grey-green — and dial the number of the one person who understands. It’s late in California, but he picks up on the third ring.
“Evander.”
The back of my throat burns, and I fear it’s not just from throwing up. I open my mouth, but struggle to find the words.
“Evander? What’s wrong?”
“How did you do it?” I ask. “How did you not kill me in all that time?”
There’s a long pause before he answers. “Because you’re my son, and I still loved you, regardless of what my wolf said.”
“Wellfuck,” I say letting out a bitter laugh that sounds more like a sob, the view of the ocean blurring in front of me. “That’s no fucking help to me.”
“What happened? Has an alpha been born into your pack already?”
“No.” I hesitate, suddenly regretting my impulsive decision to call him. He’s never failed to criticise me, though in the past two years we’ve both been making an effort to fix things between us.
“What’s happened, Van?”
He hasn’t called me by my nickname since I was a child. That, combined with his gentler tone, is the straw that breaks the camel’s back. I swipe at the tears on my cheeks, taking a few moments to compose myself, knowing that he’ll be able to hear this all through the phone.
“You’re going to think I’m crazy,” I say once I have enough control over my voice. “But I have a good reason. I had Benji join the pack.”
“That alpha kid.”
“Yeah.”
“Why?” There’s that usual judgement I get from him. I don’t have the energy to even be triggered by it, this time. I close my eyes, my head tipped back against my seat’s headrest. I’m so sick of having to explain this.
