“Aye. I need you,” he repeated in a whisper. “I need you because you’re home, and you do anything—anything—to protect your home.”
I sighed, caressing his face, feeling his words deep in my heart. He held me for a bit longer, his fingers stroking up and down my spine.
“Why does Lacey know where you were today?” I ventured to ask.
“You’re the most important thing in the world to me, and I’d never forgive myself if something happened to you,” he said, not answering the question.
“More than the SINS?” I lifted myself up, so I could look him in the eyes.
“More than the SINS,” he admitted. “Which is why I can’t tell you where—which is why you can’t—”
I put a hand over his mouth to stop him from apologizing. He kissed my palm and then placed it on his heart. “We’re warriors, Barrett. Our mission for a free Scotland is supposed to come first before anything. Before our own wants, needs, or the women we love and the families and lives we build with them. But it’s easy to promise that Scotland comes first when you don’t have anyone or anything to lose. I could lose you. Dolinsky could…”
Placing my lips on his mouth, I kissed him and said nothing. Whatever I said would sound paltry after my husband just admitted that I was his everything.
Over the next few weeks, I fed Fred Winters information. A piece here, a piece there. Everything on the Dolinsky front was quiet. It was like the man had simply vanished. But Jason continued to shadow me, and I was grateful for his presence. Flynn spent many nights away from home, not returning until early morning.
I didn’t ask where he went, and he didn’t volunteer information.
One late autumn afternoon, the city was gray and rainy, and I was cooped up with Ash looking at bridal magazines. I was going stir crazy and I hated it. I tossed aside another magazine and said, “Okay, enough.”
“Enough what?” Ash asked, not looking up from a copy ofVogue.
“Enough of this planning nonsense. Let’s get dressed up and go watch the burlesque show.”
“That doesn’t happen for a few more hours,” she pointed out.
“So what. Let’s eat dinner and then go over there.”
Ash smiled. “I’m down.” She got up, and we headed into the bedroom. She walked into my closet and began sifting for something she could wear. Ash was a good few inches taller than me, so whatever she wore of mine would be short on her.
“I’m glad we’re doing this,” Ash said, finding a classic black dress with a tight bodice and a flared skirt. “I’ve missed you.”
I stopped looking at my dresses and gazed at her. “I’ve been kind of MIA, haven’t I?”
She shrugged but nodded. “I get it. I mean I was in Monaco when you started this thing with Flynn, and then I had to deal with John, but I just feel…”
“What?”
“I don’t know. Like you’re not telling me everything. And I get it, I do, because I didn’t tell you what had happened with John right away, so you’re entitled to your own secrets.”
My heart began to pound, but I had to force myself to stay calm. “What wouldn’t I tell you?”
“I don’t know. My brother is different, too. And all this started when you met Flynn Campbell. Don’t get me wrong, I like him, and I love how he treats you. But, I don’t know—”
“There are things I can’t tell you, Ash, no matter how much I may want to.” There were things I didn’t even know myself.
“So you’re admitting there are things you’re keeping from me.”
“Yes.”
She took a breath. “Okay.”
“Okay? That’s it?”
“You’re my best friend, and I know you’d tell me if you could. I appreciate you being honest about not being able to tell me things.”
“What does Jack say?”
