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“Vandal, this will never work. When she finds out, she’s going to freak the fuck out. You can’t lie to people like that.”
“I will tell her, just not today. I need more time.”
“Time to do what?” he questions, throwing his hands up in the air.
“To make her happy, and show her who I really am, so maybe she can forgive me.”
He shakes his head madly. “I don’t know, man. This is so fucking wrong. She’s a nice girl, and you’re fucking with her mind and her heart. Do you even love her?”
Grinding my teeth, I take my time answering him. “Yeah, I think I do.”
He runs his hand through his hair, just like I do when I’m distraught. “Okay, look. I want you to be happy. You know that. You’ve had a shit fucking life and I think you need someone like her to love you and fucking help you get your shit together, like Ivy has done for me. I know what that feels like. But you cannot hurt Tabitha, Vandal.” He grabs my shoulders and gives me a little shake, forcing me to meet his eyes. “Promise me you will tell her soon. If you really care about her and love her, you have to come clean. Sooner or later, she’s gonna find out. You can’t hide her here forever.”
“I know.” But I want to.
“You could tell her now, while we’re here,” he suggests. “It might help, make it easier to have us here as a buffer or whatever. And if she freaks out, I’ll take her home.”
Rage rises up in me again at the thought of him taking her away from me, and taking her home to a dark, lonely house that is just going to depress her. “No. Fuck no. Not today.”
He sighs with exasperation. “Fine. I’m not going to fight with you. We had a nice day today. I noticed you didn’t have one drink and I’m proud of you for that. I’d like to have some more days like this. Just think about what you’re doing, okay? Think about her. Lies lead to more lies. You will never dig yourself out. If she really loves you, she’ll be able to forgive you. Maybe not right away, but eventually. You have to let that be her choice, not yours.”
I rub my temples as my head starts to throb. “I know, I know. Please, no more.”
“Are you still getting headaches from the accident?” he asks, concerned.
“Sometimes, when I get stressed out.”
“You should see the doctor. Don’t fuck around with a head injury.”
I wave him away. “I’m fine. You should go. The girls are probably having fits about us hiding out here.”
“It would be good for Ivy and Tabitha to become friends. Ivy is really sweet and she lost a lot of friends after the split with her husband, because they’re married to friends of her husband and all that shit, and they don’t like me. She would be a good friend to Tabitha, especially if shit goes down and she needs someone to talk to.”
Shit goes down.
As in, when Tabi freaks out when she learns that I crashed my car into hers and killed the one man she loved more than anything.
***
I can’t get to Tabi fast enough after Lukas and Ivy leave. I pull her to me and kiss her roughly, raping her mouth with mine, my tongue twisting around hers as I pull her blouse off and tug the white tank top down to exposure her naked chest. I cup her breast in my hand and squeeze her hard, her nipple immediately hardening against my palm. Dipping my head down, I suck her into my mouth, swirling my tongue around her nipple before biting it between my teeth while my hands work on removing her belt and then her jeans. I tug them down with her panties and force her out of her shoes, pulling her pants off. Fisting her hair, I twist her around and bend her over the credenza next to the front door, kicking her legs apart with my foot. I lick my fingers and slide them across her pussy, moistening them before I plunge into her, slamming her head into the wall. I pull her head up by her hair and bend down over her body, turning her head to kiss her.
“Sorry, sweetness,” I growl in her ear.
“Don’t be,” she comes back, breathless and panting. “Don’t stop.”
A wave of carnal desire floods me hearing her words and I pound into her wet slit harder and deeper. I want to fuck her apart, and crawl inside of her, and own every single inch of her. I pull her up off the credenza and turn her around, lifting her up and shoving her against the wall. Her legs wrap tight around my waist and she whimpers like a kitten as my cock slides back into her swollen, waiting folds. Linking her hands in mine, I stretch them above her head against the wall and seek out her pouty baby-doll lips, kissing her long and deep, our teeth gnashing against each other
“Can I …” She gasps against my mouth.
“Can you what?” I let her body slide down a few inches, so I can stroke into her with more force.
“Can I come?” Her voice is sweet, an angel’s voice saying a whore’s words. I love it.
“Yes, darlin’. You should come right now.”
And she does, because she does everything I want and need and ask for. And all of that fuels me and drowns out Lukas’s accusations and visible disgust in my mind. She clenches and grips my shaft, her juices drenching me. Releasing her hands, I slide mine down her sinewy body to grip her ass, pulling her away from the wall and holding her tiny body up with my arms as I bounce her up and down on my rock-hard cock. Her hands grip my shoulders and she kisses and bites my neck as I shoot inside of her.
“Don’t stop biting me. I fucking love that.”
Of course she does as she’s told. I carry her to the couch and fall on top of her, spreading her legs and driving back in. I fuck her for hours and soon the sun is coming up, and she is raw and exhausted and almost incoherent from orgasm overload but I still don’t want to stop. I can keep going for hours more if I want to.
“Vandal … please …” she breathes, pushing me away. “I can’t anymore.”
“Do not push me away from you. Ever.” I pull her leg up, wrapping it around my waist as I roll onto my side next to her.
“You’ve been fucking me non-stop since your brother left. Are you okay? Did you have a fight or something?”
“No.”
“He asked me if I recognized him.”
My heart jumps into my fucking throat. “Do you?”
“No. I would remember him.”
“What do you mean by that exactly, Tabitha?”
She swallows nervously and I enjoy the glimmer of fear I see in her eyes. “He’s different looking, with the hair and all the tattoos. Like you. I would remember him.”
I stare down at her and run my hand slowly up her thigh. “You think
my little brother is hot?”
“Vandal he looks so much like you there is no way I can answer that without it coming out wrong. If I think you’re hot, then he would have to be hot, too.” Jealousy kicks in but I tamper it down. At least she’s being honest. If she had denied being attracted to him I would have known she was lying, and that would bother me even more.
“He’s nicer than I am. He doesn’t tie up Ivy and fuck her raw.”
Rubbing her foot slowly up my naked leg, she locks her gaze onto mine and takes a moment to answer me.
“Poor Ivy,” she says, her voice raspy. “She doesn’t know what she’s missing.” She pulls my head down to her and kisses me in that soft, teasing way that drives me wild.
***
My phone rings later that night, but I’m still awake. Thinking. I check the screen and see that it’s Sydni.
I slide my finger across the screen and answer. “Yeah?” I lean up a little, keeping my other arm around Tabi, who’s sleeping beside me.
“Hey, you sleeping?”
“No worries. You okay?”
“Yeah, just crazy busy and I figured if I didn’t call you now I’d keep forgetting.”
I laugh at her. “I get it. What’s going on?”
“Next Saturday night Sugar Kiss is playing at the Rabbit Hole. We want you to play some A&E songs with us, to get you back on stage a little bit. It’ll be fun, like old times.”
Excitement floods through my veins thinking about playing on stage again. “Shit, that would be cool.”
“So do it.”
“Yeah, Syd. That would be fucking great. Text me the details and I’ll be there.”
“Well that was easy. The girls will be stoked.”
“I’ll see ya there.”
I end the call and lay awake for a while thinking about how cool my life would be if I could play with Ashes & Embers again and have Tabitha in my life. Lukas is right; I can’t keep lying to her. Every day is another nail in the coffin. I make up my mind right there that I’m going to take Tabi to the gig next week, slowly get her introduced to my life and then tell her the truth.
